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Chapter 33 Regrets
As the handmaiden continues to envelop the Princess in her arms with her entire body slightly rocking back and forth over and over again to soothe her crying… until the younger girl’s trembling faintly stills, she knows.
(As Eden hears the young girl sobbing and crying her heart out so hard that her voice practically breaks off and eventually dies down into the tiny whimpers, hiccupping here and there with the barest traces of sniffles…
The sound was breaking her heart too, bit by bit, and Eden thinks she might be crumbling alongside her mistress as well.
There were silent tears and dripping blood still streaking down her highness’ pale face as she coughs and hiccups so badly, which Eden shushes and wipes away with her hands, gently brushing her fingers through the girl’s long hair in an attempt to calm her down, she knows.
She knows.)
“I’ll protect you,” Eden swears to the top of her head, a solemn vow that was already broken long before they were even thought to be said, voice lost and muffled in the girl’s hair as she gently rubbed the still-trembling girl’s arms to ground her, “… I p-promise…”
Eden has never felt more of a hypocrite than she did in this one moment because she knows… she understands now that she has already failed.
The Princess was right.
The Princess was right because Eden can’t fix this. No one can fix this. How many days has it been since it happened? She was too late and she–
She… failed.
She failed her promise to Jin.
She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed. She failed, oh god this is all my fault, I should have been watching over you, I should have protected you, please, forgive me–
Suddenly, Eden felt so angry.
Because how dare she?
The tears finally falling down on the handmaiden’s face was one that of rage and grief as the girl wheeze and cough in her arms because this wasn’t supposed to happen.
The girl wasn’t supposed to cry in the first place, wasn’t supposed to break because this child was strong, was cold, was smart and dignified and Eden would rather have the Princess smirking and playing not-so-subtle stupid pranks that nearly brought Eden to multiple-near heart attacks.
Eden would rather have any of that and… and that blasted witch of a woman that sorry excuse of a queen who deserved to be burn on a stake, on the fiery pits of hell because how dare she that twisted bitch dared. She dared to do this to HER OWN CHILD?!
She needs to fix this, she has to try. She has to do something. She needs to tell this to the King, the King needs to know what his wife had done to the Princess, to his little girl, his only child.
He has to have that goddamned woman flayed inch by bloody inch before being thrown to a pack of starving dogs alive. A quick death is far too good, far too merciful for the likes of that godforsaken bitch–
“Eden,” the Princess whimpered, “Eden…”
“I’m here, I’m here,”
“You have to promise me... p-please promise me that no one will know about this,” the Princess mumbles against her, voice impossibly soft and Eden’s entire body stiffens at such a request, “Please. Don’t tell anyone, especially my father. Not even my friend.”
“What?” Eden tried to lean back to see the girl’s face, to know what is she even thinking, suggesting such a thing, “N-no! That woman can’t just get away with this!”
“Promise me.”
Eden exhales noisily, “I’m sorry, I… I can’t…”
The grip around her tightens, constricting and borderline painful, “If you ever tell anyone… I will never forgive you.”
Eden bit her lip, “…I can live with that.”
“Who says you’d still be alive?”
And Eden… doesn't know what to say to that.
At least that sounds like the girl she knows.
And Eden… doesn't know what to say to that.
At least that sounds like the girl she knows.
The handmaiden looks down at the Princess and sees her highness is no longer shaking in her embrace. Those wretched sobs have finally quieted down, with only sniffles here and there.
It seems like she's exhausted herself to complete fatigue, the poor thing, she looks like she's about to pass out on Eden’s arms any moment now with the way those eyes of red struggled to meet her’s with an attempt of a glare (but here, it simply made Eden’s heart burn with remorse) the threat in those unnatural eyes lost to the visible traces of tears.
“Shall we get you to rest now, milady?” Eden doesn’t wait for an answer as she holds the Princess by the waist securely and hooks her other arm under the knees to carry the girl up before slowly daring to stand up on her own two legs that had grown slightly numb.
Well, it is now officially past bedtime and...
Her highness did cry for a long time.
Thank God the west wing is far from the other rooms to be alerted with what had taken place here. Eden knows her highness would be furious for anyone else to hear her break down.
It was almost surreal that a servant like her was cradling her highness so close to her heart too… like an infant. And Eden bit her lip at how easy she was able to do so, at how light the girl feels in her arms. It honestly feels like she was carrying a young child instead of a young teen.
Had this happened in any other time, carrying her highness in this position would probably make the Princess snap at her in irritation and sheer embarrassment since the girl is far too older to be carried like this but they both know the Princess is far too tired–far too drained–to say anything to properly protest.
The walk to her chambers wasn’t that far, anyway.
When Eden finally managed to nudge the door open, she places the girl underneath her thick covers, taking care to tuck her snugly in, she turned away, intending to grab the girl’s brush–
The Princess’ hand suddenly wrapped around her wrist, fingers digging in almost painfully to her skin and Eden very nearly jumped as she whirled around to look at the girl with wide, startled eyes, “Milady, what’s the m–?”
“Please. Please stay,” she mumbled, “…until I fall asleep.”Download Novelah App
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