Deanara Samaniego’s POV
Am I right to trust him again?
Am I right about giving my heart to him again?
Well, it’s not like he left my heart. He never left my heart. He was there even though he wasn’t physically with me, he’s in my heart. And, even though a lot of things had happened between us…still was still with me. I can never really never forget him. How could I forget him when I have Sae…and now we are having another baby.
At first, it was something I never liked because everything is in such a mess that I felt like it would never work again. But, it might work, right? I was the one who ended it because of the fact that I misunderstood something. If I only talked to him we would not have wasted a lot of time, but he couldn’t blame me.
Okay, I no longer want to talk about the past. We are here for the future. I need to focus on the present. Now, we have clear everything about it. What’s left is for Sae and for our family. We also need to fix everything. It will be easy…but I know, right now…I have Gray…so it will be okay. I promise to listen to him again…and not be over with my reactions and emotions.
I need to trust him if I need this to work.
“You shouldn’t go to work?” He kept on telling me since yesterday, and I kept on telling him that it’s okay since I am only weeks pregnant. My baby bump is not yet visible and it’s not like this is my first pregnancy. I had Sae before and I am aware of what to do.
“Listen to me!” He pleaded. “Please? I want to take care of you.”
“You can take care of me while I am at work,” I told him. “That still makes sense, okay? We are together at work, so what is your problem?”
He hugged me from behind and I chuckled as he blew some air on my neck. “Come on! I wasn’t able to take care of you with Sae, now let me take care of you. Listen to me, just take a rest and let me do all the work.”
“I am resting,” I smiled at him. “It’s okay. I still have a lot of sketches to do and I will just get bored here.” I explained. “I promise to take my leave when I am already on my third month. How about you let me finish my work then I’ll do whatever you want to do?”
He sighed. “Okay, just don’t get tired and you will be with me…” He looked at me and kissed my forehead. “Every minute of every day. I don’t want you to get out of my sight. Understood?”
“You are being clingy…” I raised my brow. “Uh, huh…” I teased him.
“Yeah…a lot of years have been wasted between us…so I want to make it up to you.” He sadly smiled as he traced my face with his fingers…then his smile slowly turned into a smile. “I will not let go of your hand again, Deanara.”
It was unexpected, or maybe I did expect it but I forgot about it because I was too overwhelmed with the moment. Now that it’s here…who am I to say no?
“I’ll marry you.” I answered. He put the ring on my finger and kissed it. “So, don’t ever leave me after this day.”
I smiled a little. It must have put a trauma on him, after I left him.
“I am not going to leave you again if you will not make me…” I kissed him back.
“Let’s schedule our wedding, then, because you gave birth to our child. I am so excited!” I could really feel the excitement in his face. I am also happy to finally have a family with him. It’s all  ever wanted and there is no I’ll let anyone stop us again.
We are going to make it work.
“Yeah, but first, let me talk to Sae, to your family…and my family. We need to clear things, okay?” I pinched his cheeks. “And, we are going to do it when we go back.”
He nodded. We still have weeks here in the city, then after that we are going back home, then we are just going to visit the site every week. Gray also needs to focus on his airline, so it will be Ethan that will oversee it. He’s on an overseas trip right now with Sae who really enjoys traveling with Ethan. He likes Ethan that much that I am afraid there is no longer any space for Gray. But, of course, we are going to make this right.
“You don’t have to worry about my family.” He smiled at me. “They somehow knew the truth and my grandfather likes you, so you don’t have anything to worry about.” He assured me.
“I worry about the people around us.” I honestly told him. “It’s just that…”
“Babe…” He stared right in front of my eyes. “You don’t need to worry about them. Okay? We don’t live for them.”
“Sae…he’s the one I worry about.” I said sadly. “He hears a lot of things from other people and it’s not that good…” I sighed.
“Don’t stress yourself, okay?” He hugged me. “We are going to deal with it, one by one, for now…you have to continue eating. Okay?” He handed me the food and we continued eating.
After preparing we went to the office and started dealing with the things we needed to finish. I hope Ethan will be back, so that Gray and I will not handle these things. I also need to oversee our company, so I have to be back. My mother will definitely kill me. Oh, gosh! I need to tell her…okay, I have to think how to do it now.
“What is it? Do we have a problem? Why is your face like that?” He asked, concerned, at the sudden change of my mood. “What? Tell me.”
“I am thinking of my mother,” I sighed. “I need to tell her things and I really don’t know how to tell her about this. She’s a bit mad at me.” I chuckled a bit.
“Let me go with you, then, how about that?” He offered. “I want to formally ask her for your hand.”
I looked at Gray. Should I tell him? Well, he might get hurt. But, yeah…I should tell him before things get worse.
“She doesn’t like you,” I honestly told him, which wasn’t a shock to him. “She did investigate you before and she doesn’t like the result. She was also the one who told me about you and Vivian…so you will have to do something better or perhaps you will have a hard time convincing her that you are clean.”
Gray kissed me. “Don’t worry, I’ll do it.” He smiled at me. “You don’t have anything to worry about. I will do my best and prove to your mother that I am indeed worth it, so let me do it, okay?”
“Thank you!” I hugged him. “It would mean a lot if you will get her best side.”
But, I told him that it will not be easy like it won’t be easy to tell Sae about everything. Oh, my gosh! This is really my fault, and I don’t know what to do. I mean, I have a plan, but I am not sure if it will work because there’s a lot of variables that I have to think of.
“Architect Samaniego, this will be the last design.” One of the team members told me.
I nodded and smiled at her. “Thank you.”
I continued doing it inside the office, just then, Gray arrived with a bunch of flowers on his hand.
“Hi.” He greeted me.
“What’s with the flowers?” I giggled. He never failed to give me butterflies in the stomach even before. I am glad that I am able to feel this kind of feeling again. This is really making me feel alive compared to those times where I don’t feel like myself.
“Hi?” I laughed a little. “What’s that for?”
“Just because…” He winked. “I love you.”
“I love you, too, Gray.” I kissed him.
“Are you busy?” He looked at my table and checked what I was doing while I smelled the flowers that he gave me. “I prepared a special lunch, so can you spare me an hour? I want to be with you.”
“Sure, if it’s you that’s asking.” I held his hand. “Let’s go?”
He nodded.
He treated me to a special lunch like he said because he really did make me special by renting the whole place. They decorated it and made it like a candle light dinner with some flowers and lantern between us, making me giggle. There was also a live band to sing for us.
We talked about a lot of things and took a lot of selfies for remembrance. After that, we went back to work again. But, that didn’t end there. I guess Gray is really making it up for our lost time because he had prepared a lot of things for me. Those were actually simple ones but we usually eat outside and he gave me something special like some flowers, letters, and even material things that he shouldn’t be doing, but it’s okay…I mean, I want to feel special and feel his love again…because that’s what keeping me from trusting him again.
He loves me. I have to believe in that and everything else will follow.
“Do you think Sae will like this?” He asked me while we are picking some things for Sae before we go back to the city. He wanted to buy him a lot of things, but I already told him that Sae doesn't like material things, what he likes is actually exploring and traveling just like Gray, so it’s no wonder that soon he will also be a pilot.
“I want to buy things for him because I wasn’t there when he was growing up so…” He sighed. “I am not blaming you because it was my fault, but then again…I am jealous of Ethan who saw him…and he was even treating Sae like his father.” He bowed his head.
“I am really sorry, Gray.” I brushed his hair as I honestly told him. “Honestly, I never want to come home again, so I never thought about it. I no longer want to come back, Gray, and I am so sorry because I don’t have any intention of coming back in your life.”
“I’m sorry,” he apologized. “I am really sorry. It’s my fault.”
“I planned on staying at Finland, but you know I can’t…I need to take care of my parent’s business, so yeah…maybe deep inside I know I am coming back, but I never thought about it coming back to your life, Gray."
"I'm sorry for giving you so much pain, Deanara."
"Let's just move on, Gray." I smiled at him. "What's important right now is the future. So, let's not hang on to the past."
"Yeah. Thank you for giving us another chance." He looks so happy and sincere right now. So, am I. He’s really the person I want to be with for the rest of my life...that I am willing to trust again.
“Please, don’t break my trust again.” I warned him. “I am not giving you another chance again even if we will be having a child again.”
He kissed me. “I promise, Deanara. I am here with you...and I am not going to go anywhere this time.”
I smiled at him. “I promise to listen to whatever you are about to say...so, you don’t have to worry about me. Okay?”
Promises are meant to be broken, I just hope that this time we really can keep our promises.
So far, we did. After all, Vivian is no longer in the picture. She apologized to me and told me whatever I wanted to hear but of course, she didn’t just tell it to me since she showed me some proof that she really did everything to ruin me and Gray. And, I was a fool to believe that.
I did settle my issues with her and Gray’s family already cut ties with their company, so I guess that would be the start of everything now. She’s really out in our life, after so many years. Now, all I have to do is to fix everything which includes Sae and my mother.
My mother who is now calling me after so many years.
Should I answer her? Well, yes…that’s the only thing I can do right now. Answer her, maybe she’s probably calling me because she needed something from me in relation to work.
“What’s taking you so long to answer me?” She raised her brow, I was sure of that even though I couldn’t see her face. “This is the first time I am calling again, so you should answer the phone!” She raised her voice, so I am definitely sure that she’s mad about something that perhaps includes my lovelife.
“What’s the score between you and Gray?”
There you go. Yes, she knew. Of course, how could she not know that? She’s my mother and she knew everything. She must have sent someone to follow me, now I have to actually see who the hell is it that she sent for me.
“Mom…” I tried to find words, but I couldn’t as of the moment.
“I am not a fool, Deanara…” She warned me. “I am pretty sure you know that I have eyes and ears for you, don’t you think about it?”
I sighed. Of course, I know all of that. How can I not know about it? She’s my mother and I am her only child. I am aware she’s going to do whatever is in her hands just to watch me, not that I am close to Gray. Like I said, she never liked Gray after everything she’d discovered about him. She would agree with Ethan, but with Gray…I am not sure. She also doesn’t like the fact that Sae’s father is Gray. She hated me for that, like for a year…she never talked to me and was also so close to actually forgetting that I am indeed her daughter. Nevertheless, what can I do?
Now, she’s going to hate me again because I am carrying Gray’s child again…and again. And, honestly, I’m looking forward to being Gray's wife, so I have to settle this now.
“What do you think you are doing?”
“Mom, I am old enough now.” I said, calmly, but with conviction since she might not believe in me. I want her to know that I am capable of my decisions. I have regretted a lot of decisions in my life, but I am sure I will regret if the time comes that I will not spend the rest of my life with Gray knowing that we already settled things between us.
“I already agreed with you marrying Ethan,” she started, now she’s getting impatient with everything and sooner she might tell me that she’s now going to the Philippines to slap me in the face.
“But, with Gray…do you really think I am going to agree?” She was already mad at me and I could feel it from the other line. I bit my lower lip and sighed. Yeah, I know…she’s going to get mad at me, and still mad at me.
“Sae…Sae is his child, but I never said that I am going to allow my grandson to meet his father…his father who fucking hurt you and…”
“It’s a misunderstanding, mother.” I honestly told her though I am not sure if she’s going to believe in me. It’s really hard to know that now that she’s really pissed at me. How can I make her believe?
“What did you say?”
“Mom…” I counted one to three before I finally spoke again. “Mom…calm down. You have eyes for me, right? Then, how about you clarify all the issues you knew about Gray? Please…he’s really innocent.”
There was silence between us, just a minute, until I heard her hissed. “Fine! I’ll see it for myself.”
“What do you mean by that, mother?” I blinked. My gosh! Am I thinking the right thing?
“Are you in Cebu?” She asked. I didn’t answer. “I am on my way, my daughter.” I am pretty sure she’s smiling right now. “I’ll see you soon.”
Fuck! Now, I have to go back home.