Danielle still continues to vent. I've been listening to it and my neck is starting to hurt. Even though there were many things I wasn't supposed to know, it turned out they all just came closer as if there was a magnet that kept attracting me. I started to empathize a little with Danielle's story. At this time I also had time to say that many things are not important. For me everything will just go away without saying goodbye. On the other hand, I was very surprised by everything. The seconds ticked by and it even felt very cheating. I always cry for my poor self in the silence of the night. This is very embarrassing indeed. Until I realized that no one is perfect. Even though I'm at the peak of my happiness, that doesn't mean I can avoid any more problems. The reality kept hitting me until I was fed up with this life. I felt the pain was extraordinary and even felt that the world was truly unfair. Once I tried standing on stage like I did when I was little, it turns out that now the sensation is very different. This time I felt like I wasn't myself. Until I also couldn't believe what I just saw. Danielle seemed to make me realize that I wasn't the only one in the dark zone. But other people also apparently feel the same way. But, still I blame everything. My body felt shaking. Danielle slowly looked at me sharply as if she had just been shocked. I didn't say anything at all and just kept quiet. Strangely my mind started to fall apart. Danielle then handed me a tissue which probably looked like I wanted to shed my tears. I feel this is outrageous. Not many people know that I am very sensitive now. But this person actually saw me starting to suck like this. Surprisingly, Danielle's face didn't look like she was laughing or insulting me. I felt like I was in a vacuum and didn't know how to get out. Everything seemed to just stop. Frozen under the dark sky. Suddenly I remembered an old story. When a princess who wants freedom and all that cannot be achieved just because she is in a tower. I feel that the story is not much different from me now. My feet felt like they were tied to chains and even wanting to see the smiles of my fans in front of the opera stage felt very difficult. All I saw was a dark shadow and an empty room with no one but me. The reality is not beautiful. Danielle then showed something. I was shocked by what I was currently showing. This person probably intended to show off in front of me and I felt like that was true.
"You showed all this on purpose?" I asked Danielle.
"Yes. I did it on purpose. But that doesn't mean it's meant to show off. I just want you to know that there are still things you need to do.”
"What? Why do you think that? What should I do?"
“You have to get up and excel again. What happened to make you lazy like this? Someone hurt you?”
"No. It's worse than that.”
"What? Why are you silent? You should tell me. But who?"
“It's not a matter of who or how. This only concerns myself.”
"Are you serious?"
"Of course. There are no conflicts with other people. Maybe you won't believe what I just said."
Actually, I still don't want to accept this reality. It's so strange that I feel like this is true. On the one hand, there is also something strange about me. To the point where I feel like the world is just moving in the opposite direction. I have no problems to go through and I am even the happiest person in the world. I don't know why it's all just in my imagination. When I set myself on stage, at that moment I was impressed by the reactions of people who liked my performance. Until now, I'm still curious whether they will give me the same relationship or vice versa. I haven't dared to stand on a big stage for a long time. Until I remembered the last time I stood there. Now I understand the situation. When the sun starts to set or even rises, people like me usually spend their time practicing non-stop. I have to do something like that myself. For now I'm just getting started. But strangely I feel that now my legs are very heavy even if I just take a step to go to the training ground. What I feel is very different from before. This is strange and happens often. Danielle then said something to me. This time I felt that my mind was starting to become clear again. Looks like I was right.
"What are you going to do after this?" I asked Danielle.
“I should rest.”
"What?"
"Yes. It's already evening, there's nothing to do after this. I just need to go home and then sleep. What are you going to do?"
“I think I should go back to the practice room.”
“This late? Don't be kidding me."
"I am not kidding. I should have been in that room and continued practicing for a long time.”
“Where does that theory come from? If you train too hard, you will only get sick.”
“I don't care about pain anymore. "At most, we'll just take him to the hospital to just rest."
“Wow, are you a masochist? Why is it like that? Listen, maybe you feel bad about yourself, but you shouldn't do something like that. It's not like I'm worried about you. I just don't want you to have a hard time like I did."
"What? Have you ever experienced something like that?"
"Unlucky. I shouldn't have said it."
“If you don't want to say it, that's fine. You can keep it forever. Don't worry."
"No. I mean it's really embarrassing.”
"Hmm?"
"Yes. I trained so hard that I fainted and was then taken by an ambulance. At that time I was abroad. I can't control myself. I am too ambitious to continue to develop.”
“I see.”
Danielle is an honest person. I could see all the truth shining through Danielle's eyes. Now I understand why this person is targeted by many other musicians. Honesty and extraordinary talent are not obtained easily. There are many things that are sacrificed, one of which is health. It's so funny that I also do the same thing. But, I don't know why suddenly my footsteps and the anger inside me started to die down. I can't believe this happened to me. It was getting late too. Maybe I can find the answer the next day. Until where I am. All of this continues to make me very curious.
“Then, see you later Danielle. I have to go home," I said to Danielle.
"Okay."