Can't believe it's already Sunday. Instantly I felt myself in an abyss that had no end. Now I feel short of breath. Not long ago I was a little unwell. There was a lot going on and the longer it went on the more I felt depressed. At first I was just in a normal zone before finally I was in a very uncertain point. If there's something strange about all of that, my mind suddenly becomes confused. I also don't understand why all this is happening before my eyes. I'm very surprised. This morning I started with a little yoga before continuing with several other activities. Slowly I started to calm down again. The beginning was so scary that I couldn't stop thinking. It's just that right now I can't understand myself and I don't know how long it will be like this. Yesterday I tidied up the old room which I now see is much more comfortable. I also tidied up some things until I felt like I was in a different room. Not long after, I heard my cell phone ring and it turned out someone was calling me. When I saw it, apparently it was from someone I had known for a long time. I feel bad because I haven't seen each other for so long. Because of this, I feel even more guilty about why I never met him.
'Jesus Christ, what should I do?' I said to myself
Right now I'm also surprised that this person doesn't usually call me. I slowly picked up the call and started chatting with an old friend. I also thought that maybe something was going on and when I heard all the words that came out of my friend's mouth, I started to feel relieved. Coming to contact me actually just asked about news and the schedule for the reunion. In an instant I also felt better. I agreed to this guy's request and we planned to meet this weekend in the summer. I almost forgot that it will be summer soon.
"How? You really agreed to meet me this summer?”
"Yes. I agree. It just so happens that I feel like going outside just to enjoy the sunny weather.”
“Wow, what have you been doing all this time? Don't tell me you just stay in your house and don't go out?”
"Ah, to be honest, I just went to campus then to the minimarket and then went home."
"Just like that? Aren't you on holiday?"
"No. I don't have time for that.”
"Good grief. Your life is very busy. Keep the spirit alive, my friend."
"Yes. I think this has become my daily food. You're busy too, right?"
“I'm not that busy. There are a few free hours. Fun is not it?"
I'm also curious about the life of my friend who I haven't seen for a long time. Even though I myself don't believe it, that person actually came to me and asked about me. The world is very strange indeed. There are many things that are very difficult to predict. Even though the bond has long been lost, in reality everyone will meet again if the universe wants it. Is this a miracle that happened or is it something even more difficult to understand? Instantly all of this haunted me until I couldn't forget it myself. Time continues to pass. It doesn't feel like it's already daytime. Now I got up from my seat and then intended to cook my lunch.
'Wow, I almost forgot,' I muttered to myself.
Right now I'm almost not just myself. Once I realized there was something else going on, I didn't think it was time for me to just keep quiet. There are some things I should have done. Previously I felt uncomfortable with everything that happened. At the same time I almost ran out of ideas for myself. I was almost in a dark shadow that I didn't even want to be in. Pretty scary start for me. All of this just started like that. When I was confused about how to deal with everything, it felt like my head was going to explode. There were times when I felt like it all started from a really scary world like this. Until I couldn't control myself, which was getting more and more chaotic. When I see some works that I think are quite impressive, I also hope that they are not just for healing. I can't stop looking at what's in this place. I also personally still can't believe what I saw. As if this wasn't a reality. As soon as I sat down and in front of me there was a very charming sweet dish, it also made me feel like I was in a different world from me. My feelings are getting crazier because I have never been in such a different atmosphere before. Today I came to visit a place I haven't been to for a long time. When I arrived here, it turned out the atmosphere was still the same as before. My mind is focused on calm. And as soon as I entered this place, it felt like all my anxiety suddenly disappeared. I felt a comfort that I will never forget in my life. So far that's what's happened. Warm tea and sweet food certainly make you in a good mood. In front of me there was also someone I hadn't seen for a long time. It felt awkward and I tried to stay close to my old friend. Although a little clunky.
"It's been a long time since I saw you, Mariana," I said, breaking the silence between us.
“Ah, it's true that it's been a long time, Aria. By the way, how are you there? You're okay, right?”
"Yes. Of course I'm fine. How about you?"
“As you can now see, I am also very good. There are many things I have seen and all of them really make me more confident about life."
“Is that what makes you who you are today?”
"You are right. So far I've only been around here and have never gone to places as far away as you. So I guess my life just grew here. No other."
I feel like this is a different version of me. Even though Mariana said what she felt all this time, I was still too focused on what Mariana had done all this time which still hadn't changed. However, I feel like that's not a good thing. Immediately we told about several things that had been experienced. There are even some that are different. I almost felt like this was a pretty scary reunion but it wasn't that bad either. This cafe is still a legend. The atmosphere is also more authentic with its first presence. When I was in a bad mood, it seemed like coming here was indeed a much better decision than I had previously thought.
"Yes. That's what I've been doing all this time," I said.
"Is it true? So you have become a professional?"
“Actually, I still don't believe in myself. There are many things I still need to improve.”
“Why are you like this? You are usually a confident person and will do whatever you want. Why suddenly it seems like you are someone else? Is it really that hard to be a violinist?”
"Yes. I admit it.”
“How difficult is it?”
"Who knows. I can't explain it in detail. I also don't know why I am like this. How annoying isn't it?"
“What are you talking about? There is no such thing. You just need to take a vacation and calm down. For now."
Mariana continued to cheer me up. Even so I don't feel much better than before. What I see now is like I'm in a zone that I can't escape from. I felt like the world had stopped. Time doesn't feel any longer. This kind of me seems to be trapped in a vortex of horror that I can't get out of. I hope someday it will end. Surprisingly, such hopes did not come true. Mariana still says that she has had many experiences so far. I also felt moved by Mariana's story. Like telling a fairy tale that I never even understood. Now I'm still here in the same zone.
“Then what are you going to do next?” Mariana asked me.
“I guess I should return to the world where I belong.”
"You mean continuing your profession?"
"Yes. You are right. Besides, it can't be helped, this is my choice. Wouldn't it be cowardly if I ran away just because I experienced some uncomfortable things?”
“Wow, this is the new Aria I know.”
"Oh yeah, you manage this cafe in place of your parents?"
"Correct. I took this place. Because they are already busy with the restaurant that recently opened. I feel so tired from working all day that it doesn't even end."
“I see. How about your college?"
“I'm doing it too.”
“Wow. It was incredible."
"Come on. Do not praise tooo much. You're also amazing. I look forward to your solo performance. When are you going to the concert?"
"Who knows. I haven't thought about that yet."
"What? How come?"
“I think performing with an orchestra is much better. As for solo, I still don't dare. Maybe it will be two or three years before I think about going there."
"Okay, I understand. Just so you know, people are really looking forward to your event. Do you believe that you have a lot of fans?"
“Ah, I'm still not sure. "In this day and age, don't young people prefer modern music to classical music?"
"That's right. But that doesn't mean there aren't any."
Mariana kept assuring me that there were lots of fans waiting for me. After I noticed Mariana's facial expression, it was clear that this person was telling the truth. After that I felt more confident than before. I don't know why I don't feel like I regret my decision. Even coming to this place wasn't as bad as I had previously imagined. Mariana talked more and more and I also felt relieved that this person had never forgotten me all this time. Our friendship is like something out of a fictional story. Now I understand all this. My thoughts also started to clear again.