Luna is the type of girl where people don’t dare to mess with because of her bold, I don’t give a damn personality. Lower years looked up to her, especially freshmen, because most freshmen were people new in town. And don’t argue with me when I say being the new kid in town sucks. But Luna, with her bold yet caring sisterly personality, she always welcomes those kids and always keeps the lower years safe from students who find leisure on picking other students who are lower than them.
Her personality earned her the most trusted student in our school. She became the person who tours fresh students. The school also offered her to become a student council. But she denied it because she wanted the students to feel like their co-students can also protect and secure them from bullies, and that everyone can be a leader in their own, good and just way rather than to have a position where students expect them to lead and for them to follow. Luna wants everyone to have their own name based on their good and moral actions and not doing the same actions based on the positions they have in school.
She is like a warrior who fights for what is right, moral, and deserving of people. She never let her weapon down when people at the lower ladder get mistreated. I sometimes think she fits most about being a politician or government leader rather than a fashion designer. But Luna is a girl of creativity, who knows maybe in the future her art could be a means of an instrument in advocating such salient things.
I have known Luna like this my whole high school just by observing and having small talks with her. A fighter, a warrior. I always thought that no one has time to get away with her courageousness, but people were not perfect. They may be the strongest person you know your entire life, but they will never be who they are right now if they didn’t fall down or got destructed before. They may be strong as a concrete wall, but they have soft spots in their personality where most people take advantage of it. Luna’s soft spot is to fall in love.
Luna let out a low groan of frustration. “I’m a sucker with this kind of feeling, you know? I hate it,” she fiddled with her fingers before continuing, “I was in junior year and I met this guy at a local coffee shop. He was good looking, seemed like a decent guy. He joined my table, had a small talk, turned out he was two years older than me and was new in town for college studying film. Then he asked for my number telling me he might need a friend to tour him throughout California, so I explained my situation about the business thing about our family making it impossible for me to be his companion in touring, he insisted anyway,” she then took a deep breath and propped her elbows above the picnic table.
“Long story short, we had a relationship. It was cool and fun and I thought he was the best. But things slowly got bumpy. He was always pissed and saying mean things to me for just asking how was his day. It sucks. I feel invalidated by someone I value the most and dumbass me kept coming back to him. He still lets me stay, though. But it was never the same, yet I kept on trying to mend things but you know it’s pointless when you are the only one trying to work things out until one day it just went off. No call, no reply, no signs. And I was left there wondering what went wrong.” Luna flattened her palms on the table and laid her cheek on them.
I didn’t utter any words. I am not an expert with love relationships because I, too, lack those. But maybe this is the reason Luna was so eager to fight for those students in our school who get treated unfairly. Because she knows how it feels to get invalidated and to get treated in a way where no one ever deserves, especially when all you ever do is give love, care, and importance to a person who doesn’t hold the same value as you do.
“What happened after that was worst. Crying every night, barely eating, and tons of wondering what went wrong, or am I not enough? I lost my worth, but I was glad William was there. He supported me, cared for me, and was patient. Eventually, I learned my lesson, and maybe at this moment you are thinking: Luna, what a fragile girl you are.” she let out a small laugh, probably to lighten the mood.
“There’s nothing wrong with being fragile. I guess everyone has a fragile side. And maybe our fragile sides are the ones that will tell who’s the right person for us. Because the right person will never take your fragileness as an advantage and break it into a million pieces. Instead, that person will take good care to that side of yours for they know your fragileness can cause you to hurt and no right person would want their loved ones to get hurt. That guy is an asshole, Luna. A fearless, beautiful, and exceptional girl like don’t deserve that kind of treatment.” I saw her smile faintly as her eyes wrinkled a little.
“And now that you have mentioned that you learned your lesson, I am pretty sure if you get to know Kayden, you’ll know if he deserves you or not. Because you already know what’s your worth and I know it too. You deserved to be loved, cared, respected, and treated with validation. And if Kayden ever breaks your heart, I swear to God I’ll break his balls.” I slammed my fisted hands lightly to the picnic table.
Luna let out a low laugh. “Thank you, Ellie. I am so glad I’ve become friends with you.” I returned a smile.
Our heartfelt conversation was preceded by just sitting there in silence with the crickets chirring in the background and William still strumming his guitar with the sound of the rushing riverbed. I landed my eyes on him and he was looking at me, probably already knew about Luna and I’s conversation. He gave me a nod, and I looked back at Luna, who was now drifting to sleep, her eyes closing slowly.
I remembered what Luna said about falling in love. She said such a thing is destructive and I agree. Love is a battlefield. And when you’re on a battlefield, destructions are always bound to happen, because I told you, nothing is perfect.
People are not perfect, life is not perfect and love is not perfect. There will always be problems, obstacles, and destructions along the process of those things.
And in terms of love, the critical part is that sometimes you fight that battlefield alone because instead of the two of you versus the destruction, it becomes you versus the destruction and the destruction was the person you thought who would be with by your side fighting for the love you have with each other. And that will cause you to get destructed just like how Luna lost her worth.
But that is not a reason for you to stop believing and trying to love. As what they say, experience is the best teacher, hence by the time you will come to love again you will recognize who is the one deserving of your love that will fight side by side with you to the ends of the battlefield they called love.
And maybe that is the reason everything in the world is imperfect, it’s because we have to find the right people that will make the imperfect perfect. And I hope every human being in the world will find that right person who will make them feel how perfect feels like and will give them all the love, care, and importance they deserve.
~~~
We woke up very early the next day for according to the other hikers we were with at the campsite, the trail back is more challenging because you have to hike up instead of down. Meaning we have to exert much force in our legs and limbs to get back to Kayden’s beloved VW Type 2 Bus.
The thought of Kayden’s car made me miss the soft white carpet where we always lay at the back of the car, which immediately sent me yearning for my bed in our house.
I wonder if my mom frequently peeks through my bedroom or taking her free time to fix my bed, hoping that when she wakes up the next day, I will be there sleeping in my bedroom. I wonder if she misses me.
“Hey, Blythe,” I looked behind me, and though I couldn’t see the face of the person who called my attention because of the four am midnight blue sky above, I knew it was Nico just by the mention of my second name.
I loved how Nico still calls me Blythe. In Sunnyvale, people often call me by my second name because they say I am literally the living meaning of the name Blythe. Happy, carefree, and cheery and Nico calling me by my second name reminds me I can still be Blythe, and just like what Rita said, I should be more of a Blythe these days.
But after my dad died, I became just Ellie and I don’t even know if Ellie even fits me too because it means shining light and for as long as I know that light had died two years ago.
Yet, I hope at the end of this trip I could be both again. Ellie and Blythe. Or maybe I can be right now since the people I am with today call me by both names. I’ll never know. But I wish I could be both again someday.
“Can you wake Erin up? We need to get moving now,” Nico continued.
I walked inside the tent and saw Erin snoring peacefully, and as if the tables have turned I tapped her cheeks lightly just like how she woke me up in Malibu and said, “Hey, wake up! We’ve got places to go.”
We packed everything up just as the sky gave a faint light and the chirring of the crickets turned to birds chirping. And right away we hiked back to Hualapai Hilltop with our co-campers.
The hike back was indeed more difficult, but I thank God that throughout the hike Kayden or William didn’t utter any complaint.
Maybe because everyone is still sleepy, and they don’t have time to complain. And was just eager to get back to the car and get some sleep again or in Kayden’s case. Maybe he was still thinking about how he can make Luna talk to her again.
By seven in the morning, we were already halfway through our hike, and the sun was already up, hitting the canyons with its ray of sunlight as we gradually felt the scorching heat through our bodies.
Not long after that, we already reached the parking lot, and rapidly we stuff our things in the compartment at the back, and William slammed his body into the carpet to sleep again.
“Where’s our next itinerary?” Kayden asked, before starting the engine.
I rummaged through the pocket at the back of the driver’s seat to where I last placed the travel bucket list. “Uh... it says here Standin’ on the Corner?” I read with confusion.
“Where the hell is that?” Damien asked at the back as his head popped out between Luna and me. “Everywhere has a corner with someone standing on it.”
Kayden started the engine, and the car made its roaring sound, a sign that it was getting ready for another run of adventure. “I know that. That’s in Winslow. It’s a park that commemorates one of Eagles’ songs.” He turned the steering wheel and drove away from the parking lot.
At the mention of the band, I already knew what’s so essential to that place. My dad was a big fan of the Eagles.
Mom, he and I used to sing along with the songs of Eagles whenever both of them don’t have work.
There was one time where I got home from my first day of school in California and I was sulking and feeling down because of the change of environment. So, to keep me up, they played the Hotel California, and both sang the song to me until a grin formed on my lips.
The drive to Winslow is a three-hour drive, so we filled our stomachs first at Delgadillo’s Snow Cap in Seligman.
The place wasn’t so hard to find because aside from being in the small town of Seligman; the restaurant was easy to catch sight of because of the big chocolate ice cream cone displayed on its roof.
Delgadillo’s Snow Cap is a small restaurant. By small, it means the inside of it is just literally the cashier where you pay for your food and you get to eat outside.
The outside is filled with tables and chairs of different radiant colors. We took a seat at the table where there is a big Coca-Cola umbrella above that is shielding us from the heat of the sun.
Luna and I were the ones to order our food, so we went inside as the others waited. The space inside is tiny, with stickers and old plate numbers related to Route 66 filling its entire walls. Banners were hanging above the cashier register with letters on each of its triangles that spell out the word Snow Cap.
As Luna paid for our meal with her credit card, I looked around me and it reminded me of my mom’s office, where its walls were filled with sticky notes that had quotes and excerpts written on it from the books she read.
And I wondered if she sometimes pictures me there walking around, looking for inspiration for some essays I have to write. Then again, I pondered if she misses me and maybe I miss her too. That’s why I kept on thinking if she misses me.
And speaking of missing, it’s been a few days since we ran away on this trip and I have heard no news about any of us being reportedly missing. That’s odd.
The cashier finished her work with Luna’s credit card and the door of the restaurant creaked open to reveal a disturbed William.
“Luna, we have a problem,” he whispered. “James, our driver, is outside. Our parents probably already sent out some people to look for us because we have been missing for days.”
Oh, well shit. That’s not odd at all.