TRISTAN POV
I sat at my desk, annoyed by stacks of papers that wouldn't disappear no matter how hard I wished.
"TJ, what's going on?!" I exclaimed, frustrated. "How much longer will these papers on my desk stay here? I'm the boss! Why am I stuck with all this paperwork? I hired you all to help run this business smoothly. Why are there so many papers left unchecked? What are you all doing here?
TJ, my loyal secretary, stood before me, his face filled with fear. He knew my temper from years of working together and hesitated to move, fearing my anger. Yet, he presented me with another pile of documents to sign, as if offering a peace offering to calm my frustration.
How long had I been stuck in this chair, tied to this desk by endless paperwork? It felt like weeks, though it might have only been days. Time seemed meaningless in the constant grind of running this company. And what frustrated me most was that I couldn't even have a drink to ease my stress. There was just too much to do, too many problems to solve since I'd been away.
All I wanted was to drown my sorrows in alcohol, especially since Sam and I had that argument in the elevator. How I wished I could take back those words, swallow them before they escaped. But pride stopped me, a stubborn barrier refuse to let me admit defeat.
"Well, sir, you're the one—" Tj began, his voice cautious, aware of the risk of interrupting my outburst.
"And now you're blaming me?" I interrupted, my frustration building. "What the heck, Tj?! I don't pay you just to blame me for everything that should be done by you guys. Where are the employees in this company, huh? I've been sitting here for what feels like forever, checking papers that aren't finished. Don't I deserve a break, at least? I'm really tired, and I need to relax, even just for fucking a minute!"
My words filled the room, bouncing off the walls like echoes of my frustration. Tj stood there, his expression a mix of understanding and acceptance, knowing there was nothing he could say to calm me.
The weight of the papers on my desk paled in comparison to the heaviness in my heart. It wasn't the company that bothered me, but the absence of Sam, a gap that seemed to widen with each passing day. Three months had gone by since I left, wishing she would come after me, hoping she would fight for us. But the silence I encountered was loud, a clear reminder of my own insignificance in her life.
As I sat there, buried in paperwork and regret, I couldn't shake the feeling that I was chasing after a ghost, a figment of my imagination that had long since vanished. I had thought that disappearing would be enough to make her see what she was missing, that she would return to me, begging for another chance. But as time passed, it became painfully clear that I was nothing more than an afterthought in her mind.
I sighed heavily, running a hand through my hair in frustration. How had it come to this? I had given her everything, poured my heart and soul into her, only to be met with accusations I don't know where she got them.
And yet, despite it all, a part of me still longed for her, still yearned for the warmth of her embrace and the sound of her laughter. It wasn't her body that I craved, but her heart, her love, the essence of who she was. But it seemed that she could not see beyond the surface, could not understand that my intentions were pure, that all I had ever wanted was to be with her.
I glanced at Tj, who stood there watching me with a mix of worry and fear. I waved him off, unable to find the words to express the depth of my sorrow. How could he possibly know the pain of loving someone who didn't love you back? How could anyone?
"I just don't get it," I muttered, to myself. "I thought we had something genuine, something worth fighting for. But she... she just let me walk away without even looking back."
"If I keep going like this," I thought aloud, "I'll just have to accept that we're never meant to be together. Maybe it's time to release, to move on with my life and find happiness elsewhere."
But even as the words left my lips, a part of me resisted the idea of letting her go, of giving in to the harsh reality of a life without her. Was it so wrong to still hope, to still hold onto the chance of a future together, however unlikely it may seem?
"I just wish she could understand," I continued, my voice tinged with bitterness. "I don't want her body, her beauty, her charm. I just wanted her heart, her love. But she accused me of... of something else entirely."
I sighed heavily, feeling the weight of unsaid words and unsettled emotions pressing down on me. I rubbed my face wearily, the tiredness of the day reflected in the tension between me and my secretary, who stood before me, clearly scared of my mood.
As I looked at him, the fear in his eyes matched the turmoil within me. I knew that my anger and frustration weren't aimed at him, but at the emotions I hadn't resolved. The silence in the room was heavy, a tense atmosphere that lingered between us, unspoken words filling the space.
"Go ahead, Tj," I finally said, my voice gentler than before. "I need some time alone to organize these papers. I'll call you when I need you."
Tj nodded, relief showing in his expression as he swiftly exited the office, leaving me to deal with the whirlwind of emotions inside me. The quiet of the room provided a brief break, an opportunity to face the jumble of feelings that had been ignored for too long.
My phone rang loudly. I paused for a second, looking at the caller ID. It was Mr. Gomez, the old boss of the woman I used to love deeply. With a heavy sigh, I cleared my throat and answered the phone, trying to sound friendly.
"Yes, Mr. Gomez, what can I do for you?" I said, keeping my voice steady even though I felt upset inside.
"I called you because I want to see you on our 45th anniversary with my wife tomorrow," Mr. Gomez's voice came through, clear and commanding. "I've sent an invitation card to your office. Can I count on you, Mr. Buenaventura?"
I rolled my eyes at his request, knowing full well that attending yet another dull party was the last thing I wanted to do. But what could I do? Mr. Gomez was not someone you could easily say no to, and I didn’t want to upset him.
"That's good to hear," he said quickly. "I have to go now; my board members are waiting for me. See you, Mr. Buenaventura."
"Yeah, see you," I muttered before hanging up, feeling very tired again. As soon as I closed my eyes, memories of Sam rushed into my mind, unwanted and unexpected.
I saw her lying on the big, soft bed, her hair spread out like a halo, her eyes full of passion and longing. I felt the warmth of her skin against mine, and heard the sound of our breaths mixing as we held each other close. 
"Damn it!" I shouted, sitting up quickly and running my hand through my hair, frustrated. Why couldn't I stop thinking about her? Why couldn't I forget her even for a moment?
With a heavy heart, I got up from my chair and left my office, feeling like my thoughts were dragging me down like heavy chains. I needed to escape, to forget my troubles with some drinks, even if it was just for a little while.
And that's exactly what I did. I walked into the nearest bar, relieved by its dim lighting compared to the bright outside world. I ordered drink after drink, each one trying to dull the pain in my heart, to quiet the constant voice of doubt and longing deep inside me.
But no matter how much I drank, no matter how drunk I got, she was always there, stuck in my thoughts like a ghost from the past. I could see her whenever I closed my eyes, and hear her laughter in my ears, reminding me of what I had lost.
Finally, the alcohol overwhelmed me, pulling me into a deep sleep where I couldn't think about her anymore. I fell into a dark, quiet sleep, the noise of the bar fading away as I drifted off completely.
But even in my dreams, she was there, a reminder of what used to be and what couldn’t happen again. And as I fell into sleep, I knew that no amount of drinking could make me forget her. She was a part of me, deep in my heart, and no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t completely let her go.