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Chapter 18 Mr Aaron
“ How do you know someone loves you? You don’t doubt it. ”
***
— Joel —
Stepping into the school compound that morning felt so surreal.
Though it’s been just three days since I have been here, it feels like forever.
Partly because I wasn’t someone who missed school.
“ I can make you lose your scholarship, Joel… ” My Aunt’s vicious words still rang in my mind like a bell.
My parents hadn’t left enough inheritance to scale me through high school and college, so my scholarship was one thing I depended on. That’s probably the reason why she finds it very easy to threaten me with it.
***
I had just stepped into the class when my eyes met with the ones I had been longing to see all along, I didn’t miss how her eyes widened in shock at the sight of me.
“ Cecile. ” The words tasted as beautiful as ever on my lips, but I resisted the urge to say it.
The partly empty class suddenly looked empty with only me and her as our gazes locked. “ Joel. ” I read my name on her lips, her eyes were filled with diverse emotions.
“ Cecile. ” My heart cried, as the ache in it became more pronounced and difficult to ignore.
What I wanted and wished for very badly was to take her in my arms and tell her just how much I had missed her, but I didn’t.
I walked straight to an empty seat at the back and took a seat. To avoid looking or thinking about her, I brought out my latest collection of Shakespeare’s poetry and began going through them.
I was so engrossed in them that I didn’t realize just how much time had passed until we had to head downstairs for the morning assembly.
***
“ Literature as we all know is a part of art. Art is what makes life beautiful and more interesting. ”
“ Think of the best books you’ve ever read, what made them unique? Was it because of the impeccable writing or the choice of words? No right. ”
“ What made it beautiful and unforgettable is your ability to connect and relate to it. It would have been just like any other book if you didn’t find yourself becoming so engrossed in it and unable to put it down for even a second. ”
“ Think about it, what makes a writer unique? It’s their unique style of writing that all readers of their works recognize at first glance. ”
As the class went on, I became so intrigued and it was then I figured just how much I had missed listening to Mr Aaron’s lectures.
Although I had spent the last three days studying. It still doesn’t feel the same as actually listening to a professional talk about what they’ve known and learned.
The class ended with a writing prompt which was.
“ If your life was a story, what would be the first and last line? ” Those words rang in my mind even as I walked on the field towards my favorite tree.
“ Life is a gift that should be treasured. ” My mom had always said.
But was it?
Would I dare to call my life a gift?
“ Son, life doesn’t give us what we want, we simply have to go after it. ” Dad added that very day.
I brought out my notepad and wrote down my first word; Pain.
The prompt was to be submitted before the closing period so I had better work on it now.
“ Regardless of what happens in life, Joel. We can’t deny that life is a gift. ”
‘ I thought life was a bed of roses until we moved to Alaska.
Those who spoke about how beautiful yet so odd the state was, didn’t do justice to how weird it was.
Dad was happy, but Mom wasn’t. How could she be when she had to leave everything she knew and was familiar with to go after Dad?
I’d thought moving to Alaska was the biggest pain of my life until I lost my security; my parents. ’
I proceeded to put down the last line I could think of.
‘ I loved, but it broke me. I am a broken man, I am probably not meant to know how to be loved and wanted. ’
My Aunt’s words rang in my head as the pen dropped. “ We are not saints, Joel. We are the worst of all creatures. There’s no hope of redemption for people like us. There isn’t. ”
I packed my stationeries in my bag and leaned on the tree, while I listened to the bed chirping.
“ Joel. ” I opened my eyes slowly, to see the duo crouching in front of me.
“ Hey. ” I faked a smile while acting as if everything was normal when it was far from being so.
“ You missed school for not only a day, but three days… ” Leave it to Essy, to always go straight to the point.
“ Yeah… ”
“ Are you okay? ” Stacy’s was softer and filled with more compassion than her sister’s.
“ Yeah. ”
“ You don’t. ” They took seats beside me and I was in their midst.
I froze in shock when Stacy rested her head on my shoulders. “ Jemmy always did that, didn’t she? ” Her simple words brought back so many memories and then I understood why I had always loved coming here out of all places.
That’s because it's where Jemmy and I met, sat, ate, and talked every day during leisure until we went on a holiday which she never came back from.
“ I love it here, Joe. ”
“ Why? ”
“ The peace and tranquility of this place can’t be compared with anything. ”
“ Yeah… ” It’s been months, yet our conversations remain vivid in my head like it was yesterday.
“ She would be very worried about you if you didn’t show up in school for three days only to come back looking so lost and sad. ”
“ Yeah, Just like Cecile is right now. ”
“ Cecile? ” I couldn’t stop myself from saying.
“ Yeah, she cares a lot about you, Joel. ” The look in her eyes earlier had said that much, but it still felt different hearing it from others.
“ She does. ”
“ I am not good at reading people, but I do know one thing, she’s really into you… ” Essy’s words rang in my head like a bell.
Cecile is into me?
I thought I wasn’t her type.
So what’s going on?
What changed?
“ No one will ever love you, Joel. You are nothing but a worthless piece of trash. ” My Aunt’s voice rang in my head, forcing me to close my eyes in an attempt to shut it all out.
The two words rang simultaneously in my head, making me confused.
Which was true?
I needed to know.
….
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