"Why don't you just ask your father?" I asked him angrily. I was just surprised to see her here when I dropped off Auntie. He was here in the morning. I haven't even been home yet.

I don't want to talk to him anymore. Especially now I know why mother asked me to stay away from him. Too much going on I don't want to add more to my thoughts. I also know that when he finds out the truth, he will be the one who will go away.

"He doesn't want to tell me what and he also doesn't want mommy to know that I saw him here. I don't even know why he was there yesterday." he said desperately.

"I don't know anything either. So can you just leave?” I pushed him until we got to the parking lot so he wouldn't refuse to leave.

"What are you doing here Katarina?" There were cars blocking it so I couldn't see who was talking.

I looked at Travis. Suddenly, his forehead furrowed as if he was thinking deeply. He ran closer to the person that we’re bickering. I tried to stop him but the woman's scream made him stop.

"I should be the one asking you that question! What are you doing here? You're here for your mistress, right?! Leila deserves that accident!" she responded loudly to the person she was talking to as if she was shouting. And here I confirmed who were these people.

"What did you say, Mom?" Travis asked.

"W-what did you just say?" I stepped closer to him. I really wanted to hurt him but his son quickly stopped me. “Repeat what you said! How dare you to say that on my mother?!”

"Ah so you're the fucking daughter of her." he laughed, grinning from ear to ear. “Your mother deserves it! Because she's so desperate to have my husband."

"Katarina! That's not true." her husband stopped her.

“Oh really? When in fact you’re very excited when you first met her again, didn’t you?” she mocked her own husband.

“We don’t even have a proper conversation! She still has a grudge against me and I think it will never be gone.”

“I don’t care about how she feels but you should consider your wife’s feelings.”

“Why it is hard for you to understand that I always consider you. I always here to understand you! I even the woman that I truly loved. It isn’t enough the I choose you over her?”

“What I need is your love!”
"But I am already loving you." he said dramatically. Are they making a flop movie?

“What do you mean dad, that you chose mom?”

“You’re pathetic! Whatever you’re reason you don’t have the right to say that she deserves it!" I shouted at her. How dare her to say that my mother deserves it? No one deserves to be in that state.

"I don't care about her!" she furiously looks at her son, "And you! don't you think I won't know about your little crush, is this her?" she laughed out loud.

I don't care what she says. I had nothing else in mind but to hurt her. But she suddenly got my attention with what she said next.

"Don't you dare fall in love with this kind of girl. She will be just like her mother, a club stripper.”

"Stop it, Katarina. Stop talking nonsense.”

"Oh, it seems like her daughter doesn't know the dirty work of her mother. I bet you don't know about how you were born. Wanna know?”

"Come on, let's go home."

“No! let me tell this girl a story.”

“Your mother was heartbroken when my husband left her and as a club stripper, she slept with everyone.”

"You're lying..." I got out of Travis's grip and rushed to his mother. "Aren't you telling enough stories?!"

“Alexa!”

"You'll just like you mother." After she said that, she just laughed like she was losing her mind.

"Please stop, Alexa." She picked me up and took me away from his mother.

"Katarina get up!"

I screamed because I couldn't handle my feelings anymore. My tears didn't stop as if there was no plan to stop. My mind is a mess. I don't know what will happen to mother after what I found out today. Which I don't even know if it's a truth or a lie.

"Let go of me!" I got out of his grip and pushed. "Get away from me!"

“Alexa…”

“Travis, let’s go.”

“But dad.”

“Help me take your mom home first.”


___
I do not know what to do. I feel like I'm going crazy. Why do I have to experience this?

Who should I believe? Is there no one sensible enough to tell me the truth? There is only one person who can tell the truth. But I will only know that if she is willing to tell me. But for now, she needs to recover first.

"Alexa, someone is looking for you outside." Auntie said after she arrived.

I was sitting next to mom's bed. She was sleeping soundly. When she was brought here, I chose to hide from her. It was night when the surgery was over. Auntie called me to say that mother is in the recovery room. I just waited for her to fall asleep again so that I could watch over her when auntie got home. She said she would take mother's things. I'll just go home when she comes back because I have to work too. I found a another job offer in a restaurant. I hope they will hire me.

We are in a room with other patients. Only curtains serve as barriers to each patient's bed. This is the room we chose to reduce our hospital bill. Tomorrow, I have to work for mother's recovery. Even though I didn't want to, I agreed to auntie's decision to accept help from that man. Good thing I have savings since I started working. I really tried to save but it wasn't that big either because there were unexpected expenses. Especially since mother only give me allowance when she's in the mood. But that will also help to buy medicine.

I bid my goodbye to aunt and left the room. I also really need to go out because I don't want to hear the cries of other patients or their guardians here. Everyone is having problems with where to get money to pay the hospital bill.

"Alexa..." My eyes widened when I heard that voice.

I didn't hear that for a few days. Even though I've been avoiding her for a long time, I've gotten used to her being silly. I've gotten used to her presence so on days when I don't see and talk to her, I also feel sad and worried.

I stood up to face her when she suddenly ran towards me and hugged me tightly, I just managed to keep us from falling. Suddenly she cried while hugging me.

"Are you done?" I have nothing else to say. She was hugging me while crying. I don't know what I should say. I don't know how to comfort people's feelings.

"Umm...sorry." She separated from me and looked away.

"Can we talk somewhere?" she asked shyly.

It's like a different person is in front of me now. She is shy to talk to me as if she is very careful about what she says.

"Sure." I said sparingly.

I'm not mad at her. But first I want to wait for what she has to say. Even though mother said to avoid her. In fact, she should be angry with me because of what happened. But in such situations, who has the right to be angry? Everyone is entitled to be angry.

She followed me until we reached the rooftop of the hospital. It's better for us to talk here than with many people. Because I think she has a lot to say today.

"How are you?" she initially asked me.

"I'm exhausted. There's a lot of things that happened." I smiled bitterly and looked outside. It's good that these people don't seem to have any problems in life.
It is easy to say those words because I am only seeing them. But I don't know what's really going on with their lives. They may be tough, put a smile on their faces, laugh with everyone but we never know if it's what they really feel. Each one of us has a problem that we are always keeping in ourselves.

"Yeah right. How is your mother?” she asked still gently. I'm not really used to seeing her like this.

"The surgery was successful. She's now recovering." I looked into her eyes, "You know my mother, right?

"I guess there's no point of hiding it right?" she laughed softly. "Yeah, I know her. My mom was the one who introduced who's your mother is. I remember it when I was only five years old. My mom invited me to somewhere, I don't know that place but I saw your mother from afar. Mama told me something about her that I don't quite understand at that time."

I frowned because of what he said. Is this what Travis' mommy is saying? What is mother's job?

"She told me that she's my next mom. That my dream to have a baby sister will come true once she becomes my mom. I was stupidly happy at that time because finally I will have a sister but I didn't know what she meant that time. She also said that papa has a big sin against your mother, so what I need to do for my papa to be forgiven is to take care of you." Her tears gradually fell. I just looked at her. I don't know what to do and I don't understand what she is saying.

"Ever since that day I always caught mama crying every night but she always said that it was nothing to worry about. I don't understand what was happening before. I also caught them fighting but they tried to hide it from me because whenever I'm with them they're always happy and we look like a perfect family. She always said that I shouldn't be angry with you. Times have passed as she keeps saying it. And when I was in 7th grade, I accidentally heard their conversation. My mom was furious that time she was yelling at my dad. She said...she said my...my papa forced your mother to make love with him. You know what's funny? You were born when I was only two months old. I want to hate my father when I learn about it, when I already understand what it means. But I can't. My mom always tells me not to hate my dad." she just continues to talk while tears are flowing out of her eyes.

"She said she wanted to hurt your mother, she wanted to rebuke her but she couldn't because my father was the one to blame. And every time she sees you sad and your mother is shouting at you, she wants to hug you and make you her own child because you are innocent Alexa. We're always watching you from afar. She couldn't be angry with you for another reason…”

"I didn't know at that time that my mother was suffering from cancer. She wanted to be happy in her remaining days. Even in her last breath she mentioned you and your mother. She said that I need to protect you and don't ever feel any hatred from both of you and soon I will understand what she was saying. She's dying, that's why she chose to live in peace."

"I think my mother is disappointed in me. Because the moment you talked to my dad all the memories of the past came back to me. I feel furious and annoyed at you. It's like...hasn't mom been nice enough? Haven't I tried to be your friend enough? Are you really going to snatch papa? Or maybe...you might sue papa once you know the truth. I don't want to lose another parent Alexa. I know how heavy his sin but he is all I have. I'm sorry.”

"I don't know what to say, sorry. I'm so confused right now." That's all I can say at the moment.

"That's okay. I understand, things are happening too much at once. And I'm glad that you talked to me."