*****************//PRESENT//********************
"Brown guilty eyes and little white lies
Yeah, I played dumb but I always knew
That you'd talk to her, maybe did even worse
I kept quiet so I could keep you~"
Those lyrics keeps on ringin in my ears as I walk in the dark entrance of beverly.
Gosh. I love that song. I get my phone in my pocket to listen to this song.
I don't want to look so bitter but this song reminds me of our love story...Can I even call it 'love story'?
"And ain't it funny
How you ran to her
The second that we called it quits?
And ain't it funny
How you said you were friends?
Now it sure as hell don't look like it~"
I will not lie about my feelings. We ended our relationship six months ago but I'm still stuck with his memories.
But he lied to me. Saying that the girl I keep on stalking is nothing then one day I will see a post where they are together and it's their third monthsarry.
Oh, fuck that shit.
"You betrayed me
And I know that you'll never feel sorry
For the way I hurt, yeah
You'd talk to her
When we were together
Loved you at your worst
But that didn't matter
It took you two weeks
To go off and date her
Guess you didn't cheat
But you're still a traitor~"
I felt a pang of pain in my chest. Shit. This song is getting in my nerves as I walk this dark alley.
"Ooh-ooh-ooh
God, I wish that you had thought this through
Before I went and fell in love with you~"
A message suddenly pop out of my phone that is why I immediately read it.
The message is from Niña.
From Niña:
Kkkkkkkkkk!
From Niña:
Ily.
From Niña:
HOOOOOY!!
From Niña:
Are yoy alright?
From Niña:
ANSWER ME!
From Niña:
I'M STILL TALKING TO YOU BISH!
I just shake my head. Is this one of the effect of having a boyfriend?
To Niña:
Ngii? Why saying "I love you" today?
To Niña:
Are you into drugs?
This is new to me. Her saying this words and filling my messenger with her message.
From Niña:
Because there are people who loves you.
A smile crept into my face.
From Niña:
L doesn't love you.
From Niña:
That why I will be the one who will say I love you to you.
My smile suddenly drop when I read her message. I just give her a finger fuck emoji.
"I think this girl is under a drug label by the name of love."
From Niña:
HOYYY! ANSWER ME!
I just shake my head before typing...
To Niña:
I already moved on Ninaxx. He can't affect me now:)
Maybe I'm lying to myself. But I gotta believe that I already moved on in order to move on completely.
From Niña:
You said that you'd already moved on but look at the emoji that you user.
Our conversation makes me laugh. I can't believe that moved on words too.
Yeah. That words is not convincing after all.
I'm still walking when I suddenly got a call from Niña.
"Believe it if you don't want me to disown you." Niña said.
This is making me confuse. Why all of the sudden she's being like this?
I laugh before answering her. "Why?"
I hear her sigh. "So are you okay?" She asks.
I'm confuse because of her questions. Maybe because of our topic earlier?
Ugh! Who said to bring the past back?!
"Physically or emotionally?" I asks while walking. I'm still kilometers away from our house but I always want to walk in this dark road.
"I'm not gonna ask you spiritually, You are a demon remember? Hahahaha joke." Niña laughs like a mad woman. Her laughter makes me laugh too.
I just ended the call. She's like a drunk woman who keeps on messing with me because she's drunk.
I just don't know what to say so I ended up the call. They know me anyways.
I'm too deep... that is why they think they can easily hurt me.
I'm too sensitive... that is why they think a tiny thing can makes me cry.
But they don't know that I'm too cold hearted to believe their shits.
I abruptly stop walking when I unexpectedly saw a person that I keep on ignoring.
Our eyes met as I continue walking. I was having a self conflict for a moment.
My heart scream to stop and greet him. Longing for him. But my mind angrily shout to keep on walking and never stop.
With my heart and my brain fighting, I listen to my grumbling stomach. Pass by him. Ignore him and eat.
I smile as I fasten my walking a little. I never look back. I dare not to even though my heart ache. Even though my brain starts screaming the same words with my heart.
Look back and tell him how you really feel.
But no. I will not. Not now. I undriend him in fbook so I can moved on.
And that's how my night walk goes by... I passed by him and never look back...
.
.
.
.
.
"Girl! Finally! The crown is finally out of your head!" Karyll exclaimed when I finish telling her my encounter with Luigi last week.
I just stare at the shining sky. We are currently eating Chawfan. I have a stressful week so I unleash all the stress by eating with her.
I put my hand under my chin and wonder... "Should I atleast say hello and ask him how was the new girl?"
I heard Karyll chock so I look at her and laugh a little. "Gaga ka! I praise you for ingnoring him and now you're gonna tell me that this is how you think about that freaking encounter?! Ay pota ka! I thought you're not marupok then---- Ugh!!!"
I just laugh at her stress reaction. If she can pull my hair out of frustration, I think she will.
"Chill. I'm just wondering. And I know that I'm too expensive to be handle by him." I smirk at her and she roll her eyes.
"What if Luigi decided to go back to you? Will you let him in again?" She ask in a serious voice.
I pout and think. Will I let him again? I raise my brow. "Girl, It's on the mood right now. The comeback of two souls who decided to call it quits long time ago."
I flick my finger. "Yes! I saw that on my news feed. Everyone is getting back together. Ugh! Those pips just want to hurt. Themselves again."
Karyll laugh. "How about you?" She smirk at me while giving me a knowing look.
I smirk back. "Who knows?"