“Are you going to stay at the door all day?” Neriah asks, turning from the TV and glancing at Cainan, who’s been at the door since he came to visit her about ten minutes ago.
Shawn had to leave last night and told her he wouldn’t be able to visit in the morning because of work, but will definitely come over to spend more time with her once he closed. Cainan comes to visit every day as usual, but there was a difference between him and him as much as possible. He tries to stay off mentally and hopes that somehow helps emotionally.
“Not really, what’s on?” He asks, walking into the room. Neriah sees a black shopping bag in his hands and as much as she tries to ignore it and focus on the TV, she can’t and she wonders what is inside it.
“Black Panther,” she answers, looking at the TV before turning to stare at him again. “What’s in your hand?” She asks, her curiosity getting the best of hers.
His eyes drop to the bag in his hands and his hands tighten around the handle as though trying to keep it secure, but he speaks up. “Well, you know how you always said if this cancer didn’t return, you’d be out chasing your dream of being a fashion designer?”
That was a discussion they had last week where she explained basic things about herself to him, including her dreams and aspirations.
“Yeah,” she trails off, not knowing what he’s driving at and isn’t sure she can wait for the revelation of what he’s holding.
“I got you a journal. I want you to sketch out the designs you hope to work on and name what you need and I’ll get it for you.”
She stretches her hand out, and he hands her the bag. She opens the bag and there is a journal and a pencil inside. For a moment she had thought he was pulling her legs and didn’t think he had taken her sad, sappy and boring story into consideration. That he listened means he cared, that he cares means the bad blood between them is less. She loves his company even more than she’d like to admit out loud, and his new attitude makes it hard for her to have a wall around her every time he is near.
She smiles and her hands curl around the pencil, “Thank you, it means a lot to me.”
“You’re welcome.” he sits beside her and watches as she does her work sketching out unique designs for glamorous gowns first then proceedings to skirts tops, blouses and sundresses.
“You’re great at this,” Cainan compliments, speaking for the first time in the past fourteen minutes he’s been watching her sketch. Her expert use of the pencil to make strokes on the journal to bring the drawing of the designs to reality.
It baffles him and leaves him in awe.
“Thanks, it’s always been a dream of mine, to own something big in the name of fashion, and that was why I moved to the city. The city just wasn’t what we thought it would be or what I dreamed it was.” her eyes drop and she places the pencil inside the journal before closing it.
“I’m sorry,” he apologises, feeling the guilt wash over him once more.
She turns to look at him and their faces come incredibly close to each other to the point he can feel her breath on his skin. A part of him wants him to lean in and feel her lips on his and, though it feels wrong, he can’t help it.
“You’re really beautiful,” he gushes unintentionally as his hand lift to stroke her face when the door opens and Shawn walks in.
He pauses a little at the picture his eyes meet, which is the picture of Neriah and Cainan in an intimately close space. He also notices the looks on both their faces; Neriah looks like she’s confused at what is happening, while the one on Cainan's face breaks Shawn’s heart because he has seen it and because he seems to know well what the look is.
Neriah might be oblivious to it, but Shawn knows Cainan probably has developed a strong, uncontrollable feeling for her and although he had suspected it for a while, it seems so obvious now and for the first time Shawn feels insecurities washing all over him. He’s never doubted his love for Neriah, nor has he had reason to doubt hers, but Cainan just seems to make him do that for a moment and it isn’t something he’s proud of.
He doesn’t hope to contend or fight about who’s got Neriah's heart, which he knows is him, but he wonders if Cainan would be the right person to give her all she ever desired, something he might not do. That thought makes his blood boil, and he knows he can’t take it anymore.
“What are you doing?” Neriah asks in a whisper.
“Nothing, there was something on your face,” Cainan lies, and he withdraws his hands from her face when they hear the clearing of the throat and when they both turn to look at the door, they see Shawn standing there, having a pensive look on his face.
Shawn awkwardly stuffs his hands into his pocket and walks further into the room. “Did I interrupt something?”
“No, no,” Neriah says, shaking her head, “Cainan is just being nice and helping me take something off my face.” She repeats the lie Cainan has just told her.
Shawn’s scoff is very low, but Cainan hears it and he gets down from the bed and straightens his T-shirt. The feeling in the air doesn’t seem pleasant anymore. He could tell Shawn was angry under his melancholic mood and his anger appeared to be directed at him.
“I should go,” he blurts.
“Why?” Shawn asks, shooting daggers Cainan’s way with his eyes, “she wants you here, it’s obvious.”
Cainan looks down at Neriah who looks a little devastated about his leaving and he wants to reach out and hold her and tell her he wouldn’t leave her, but he knows he can’t, so instead, he turns to Shawn who seems to be in the mood for a throw down even before his girlfriend. “We should talk outside,” he said and walks out of the ward.
Shawn follows him and as soon as he gets to the corner where Cainan is, he punches Cainan in the face. Cainan stumbles backwards, taken by surprise and he sustains himself from falling by holding on to the wall.
“What’s your problem?” Cainan exclaims, holding onto his jaw, which had taken the hit.
Rage and the venom of hatred lace Shawn’s voice as he speaks. “You’re really asking me that? You Cainan Inferno, you are asking me that? Is this the price she pays for your generosity? The price I pay?”
Cainan frown as Shawn talking in parables isn’t helping the problem or anyone. “What are you talking about?”
“I saw the way you were looking at her,” he explodes.
“I don’t know what you’re talking a—” Cainan doesn’t get to finish, and he’s glad because there was no truth to what he’s saying.
“You can’t deny it because I know you love her and now you want to make her yours.” Shawn accuses.
Cainan continues to rub his jaw to ease the pain, and he tightens it as well before shrugging, “Yeah, maybe I do. What’s wrong with that?” There is boldness in his voice and honesty in his eyes. “Neriah is a beautiful, sweet, and wonderful lady. Any man in their right senses wouldn’t have a hard time falling for her.” He pauses and his brows drop. “what? You think you’re the only one that’s supposed to have feelings for her?”
Shawn surges towards Cainan, but Cainan grabs him by his collar and slams him hard against the wall. Cainan has always been the stronger man. They both knew that, or at least he knew it, and the rage going through Shawn couldn’t supersede Cainan's strength. Age, skill and experience make him the better fighter and if beating Shawn would make him hear what he has to say, he’d gladly do it.
They are in a corner, so no one would notice what is happening unless they decide to make a sound or a heavy brawl.
“Son of a bitch! This was your plan all along. Hire me back so you can do whatever and I wouldn’t be able to say anything or do anything even if you hurt me.”
Cainan pushes him harder against the wall, sneering into his ears, “Even if I didn’t hire you back, you wouldn’t still be able to say or do anything.” He lets go of his shirt and Shawn quickly straightens it and glares murderously at him.
He takes a step back, “You’re right, I am a son of a bitch and I definitely can’t be trusted around your girlfriend because I have developed genuine feelings for her and that is understandable, but what isn’t is you trying to put the blame on her and think she can’t be trusted. She’s sick and delicate and the last thing she needs is some insecure man around her.”
“Then stay away from her, from us, Cainan. Leave and don’t come back.”
“You can’t tell me what to do, Shawn.” He points out the obvious.
“I can’t, but Neriah loves me and leaving is out of the picture for me, so why not be the better man for once in our goddamn life and go away!”
He points his finger at Shawn, “Listen to me, young man-“
“No, you listen, old man. I think it’s high time you stop running after women that’ll never be yours. That lady in there isn’t Clara, and I am not Hugo. We love each other and I won’t let you ruin that for us, so leave.”