"The task was easier said than done."
"You see, Nusaiba was a very healthy child, plump and active so she was  always hungry and playful.10 minutes away from her and she might end up toppling over her cot.
One time, I went to bath after putting her to sleep, I purposely kept her in the living room so that others can watch her. When I got to the room, the fatigue my body was suppressing suddenly overwhelmed me and I couldn't help but lay down on the bed hoping to stand up in a few minutes, what I meant to be a few minutes became about an hour as I drifted into what was a very peaceful sleep compared to the chaos going on in reality.
Soon, a very angry scream of my name and an equally painful slap on the back jolted me  to my feet, confusion clouding my brain as I saw my mother in law holding a heavily breathing, crying Amal, her eyes were red and her breathing laboured ndicating just how much she had cried, her tear stained eyes gave no room for doubt about what the commotion was all about.
Quickly, I collected her from my mother in-law and started pacifying her,
"Your job was to make sure she doesn't even cry at all, not pacify her when she have cried her eyes out. How hard is taking care of your own child?
What is deemed a blessing is what you abandoned to come and comfortably sleep? Even the mother of a healthy child does not abandon her child talk less of the mother of a......." My mother in-law was enraged, but not enough to call her own Nusaiba a sickle cell. Then, I had thought of her as harsh inconsiderate, Amal was always awake in the night and when she wasn't awake I was up either fulfilling her father's needs or praying for her health. She was already 3 month old, really fast approaching the fifth month, the doctor had said the 5th month is the time the disease starts to manifest. He had said in children it mostly starts with painful swellings in the hand and legs, jaundice,joints pain and so on. So I thought why not present her case to the All-hearing and All-knowing, let him be her healer and her protector, due to this, i had lots of sleepless nights so any opportunity I got to rest my eyes I scrambled for it as it became rarer by the day."
" Of course you were not wrong at all, It's normal for anybody to want to rest, in fact sometimes the mind doesn't want to rest but the body screams for rest.
You being the mother doesn't make you the only person entitled to taking care of the child.
what about her father?
what about her grand mother for goodness sake?" Humairah interrupted, she was obviously fuming,her nose flaring, the whole thing was bizarre.
Which law stated that taking care of a child was solely his mother's responsibility?
Nur just smiled and shook her head.
"There might not be a written law  but here in Africa, the mother is held accountable for whatever goes wrong, the father works for the financial stability then why can't the mother take care of the home? "
"Amar was busy, he did what he could when he was around and he wasn't tired from work which was mostly Saturday and Sundays and even then his Mum always told me to be there.
"He is a man, and this is his first child, he doesn't know how to even hold a Baby, that was always what she said."
"Bullshit, did you tell her you had experience,or did she give you another Baby?
He is even older than you so what's all the fuss about?" Humairah interrupted again, she was on her feet pacing the room, her voice had gone octaves higher, her anger was getting the best of her.
No matter how much Nur wanted to feel annoyed by her sister's interruptions, she couldn't help but feel a bit relieved, anytime she allowed her mind to wander to the past, she felt ashamed of her thoughts and incapabilities, there were so many things she wished she could change but hearing her sister's outburst, supporting her, if not anything, it made her feel normal.
'It is what a normal person would have done.' That served as her consolation, it was able to argue with the guilt in her mind a bit and she felt it was a worthy reward for allowing herself to reminisce such memories. So instead of cautioning her sister, she simply watched her rant about how unfair they were to her and unknowingly, a small smile made its way to her face si when Humairah finally took notice of her sister, she stopped,then shyly looked up to her making Nur let out a laugh shaking her head, a teasing smile still plastered on her face said
" Do you want to continue or can I humbly ascend the podium?"
Mairah huffed then poked her sister's arm taking her seat beside her, she leaned her head on her sister's arm and whispered.
"You deserved better, I want you to believe that."
Nur smiled and patted her head
"You don't know the full story yet." She replied.
Before Humairah could reply her, she continued her story
"Since that day, I never left Amal alone and if I did, I minimized the time we were apart, I grew so close to her that she didn't allow anybody to hold her if it is not me,. She only smiled when I was around and if for some reason I wasn't with her, upon my arrival, her excitement knew no bounds. She would almost topple her cot to reach me, her hands outstretched signalling me to pick her up. We were each other's half, I no longer got  tired, her smile was rewarding, her cheerful chattering was enough motivation, so I pushed myself to do better and hope better. My Amal will live, I won't let my "Hope" die.