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Chapter 17 The Shadow
It's been for days since the accident and So Eun didn't get in contact with Hyuk Soo for a while. She knows that the model keep trying to approached her, but somehow she doesn't want to talk with him for now. Hyuk Soo can't do a lot for that. No matter how much he wants to run and come to her right away, he can't do that due to his massive schedule.
Since the end of the drama web, he keep getting lots of offers to do some commercials, photoshot and even another drama. His popularity increase rapidly since the scandal that happened with Kim Min Hee.
He does confirm that they didn't have any romantic relationship but netizen still assumed that he merely covering their real romance. Every times Hyuk Soo get invitation to join the show, people keep asking him about her even though he keep denying the rumors.
In contrast of his increasing fame, So Eun's life is not much different from before the drama. She doesn't get any new offers of drama or anything like her boyfriend. Her insecurity keep haunting her everytime she find Hyuk Soo's face on the TV screen or some commercials product on the street. If feels that their distance gradually become even bigger.
That night, after she finished her day of doing some audition, she was walking slumply toward her house. She feels like she was lost her value and pride. She feels like nothing. From a distances she catchs the figure of tall man is waiting in front of her house. He is leaning on his side car. So Eun instantly stop and freeze on her place.
Hyuk Soo recognize her appearance from his corner eyes. He stand straightly and looking at the girl in silence. How much he miss her. But So Eun doesn't show any expression when she looks at him. He can't read her mind nor her expression. But one thing that he knows, she doesn't show any trace of her sweet smile nor welcoming him at all. Instead the girl sigh deeply before walks toward her boyfriend.
"So Eun-ah... Why didn't you answer my call at all? I miss you so much" Hyuk Soo trying to talk in a soft tone and not going to offend her at all.
He can feel that lately she has been drawing a line between them. She has been avoiding him and it kinda make the model feel nervous. The posibility of their relationship development toward its end fear him. He doesn't want to lose her.
"I know you are so busy with schedule so I don't want you to be troubled by my exsistance, and also I am busy on doing some audition every here and then" she answer him in a flat tone. Didn't show any interest of the conversation, well... To be exact, she doesn't show any interest of the man in front of her.
"So Eun.... Did I upset you so much?" ask Hyuk Soo carefully. He takes her hand and hold it tightly. The girl just fell silence without giving him any respond.
"Oppa...." she call him quietly.
"Ah that's right! I heard that there is a new interesting site to visit at Hongdae. Do you want to go there together?" Hyuk Soo ask her with a wide smile.
He is trying so hard to divert their conversation toward another direction, somehow he is afraid to listen on anything that she will continue after she call him with a cold flat tone like that.
" I don't think it's working" she mumbles in a low voice. Hyuk Soo instantly gulping down his saliva and feeling so nervous.
"what.. Do you mean?" there is a crack in his voice. So Eun sighs deeply and looking toward another direction.
"I don't think that our relationship is working oppa... So, rather then we waste our time on holding into this romance I think it might be better for us to end it now...." So Eun finally can speak out what's on her mind for some times now.
"No... No... We are good, we can work it out. We might only need to put more effort, please So Eun, we can't just let go like this... We are fine...." Hyuk Soo trying his best to convince his girlfriend. His heart is pounding hardly. He takes both of her hand and desperately holding on to its.
" No... We are not fine.... Let's Break up oppa... " So Eun actually really said it. Hyuk Soo can't believe her. She seems so cold and distants. Why is everything turn into the wrong direction? What did he do wrong?
" So Eun-ah... Please... I know I am at fault. I know you must be frustrated and fed up of me... I shouldn't have leave you alone that day to bring Min Hee with me... I know you might feel terrible about every scandal I created over it. But you do know that you're the only one for me right? What I have with her is all in the past... " He is trying to explain everything to make her stay. He really doesn't want to end their relationship just like this. He loves her.
" No oppa... That's not what's matter here...." she is speaking with a pressed tone and looking directly into his eyes.
"Then what is this? Let's fix this together, okay?" He is pleading her.
"No.... We can't fix this oppa.... We can't... Being with you make me feels like I have been lost my own value... People are saying that I was use your fame to climb on the social ladder... And I don't want to do that. I don't want to take you for granted!" So Eun speaking with a heavy heart. Acknowledging it directly like this make she feels like a loser. It feels so suffocating and crumbling her pride.
" what do you mean So Eun? Did you forget? You are the one who makes me who I am today, you are the reason why I dare to take a step and come backs to this life. Without you, I wouldn't be able to reach my dream anymore. Saying that you are using my fame to climb the social ladder is a nonsense! You are talented, that's why you get the chance!" Hyuk Soo argue her right away. Her reason of breaking up with him feel like a total bulshit for him.
" I am not! Look at me, I am... Just me! And you.... You are a big star here. We are coming from a total different world oppa" So Eun mentioning how he get a lot of offers after the drama but not like her, she get nothing. It's just a prove that she is not talented as how he describe it. All his word feels like a total lie for her right now.
"just by staying with you and being in relationship with you was suffocated me, the more shining you are the more I become a worthless dust. You make me feel so small oppa. You... You make me lost my pride and value... And It hurt me so much..." The girl can't hold on her tears anymore. She feel misserable. She is sobbing silently and trying her best to control her emotion, but she can't.
" So Eun.... " Hyuk Soo reach out for her and touching her shoulder but she takes a step back to avoid his touch.
Her action of rejection makes he feel so broken. He watch her with a sad and awful expression. The girl looks really pathetic and miserable. Where does the prideful So Eun gone? Where does her beautiful and cheerful smile gone?
Is he really become the reason who hurt and crushed her like this? Was being with him really a mistake for her. He feel the urge to hug her tightly but he can't when he think that he is the reason which make the girl sad. Hyuk Soo pull out his hand weakly.
"Alrigth.... If the separation with me would make you feel happier, Then do as you like... I... Would accept that" Hyuk Soo talks in a low voice. He keep staring at her in a hope that she would forbid him to go. But no, she keep avoiding his eyes like she really doesn't want to see him anymore. The man sigh deeply.
"Goodbye So Eun..." He bid her a farewall and walk toward his car with a limp feet.
Once he enter his car and turn on the machine, he does a double check on her through the side rear mirror. He keep hoping that she would stop him to go, but no... She is still standing there without looking at his direction.
"I love you So Eun..." He tell her reflection before drive his car away. They are really break up now.
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