When she awoken again, Farhan was still sitting beside her, the car was parked and he was watching her intently, her head throbbed with a dull pain as she tried to sit up straight, she winched, he reached out to hold her hand. Instantly, she began to recall everything that happened.
Unable to stare into his eyes anymore, she looked away ashamed as tears began to fill her eyes once more, he didn’t speak, he just stared at her intently, his face devoid of any expression.
She thought and thought but no words came to her mind. What could she possibly say at a moment like that? finally, he spoke, his voice gentle and reassuring, “I didn’t want to wake you up, we will be staying here for the time being,” he gestured towards the house in front of them.
She looked towards the house; it didn’t look familiar.
“What place is this?” She managed to ask.
“My home” he answered, “this is where I grew up, all those stories I told you; this is the place they all happened.”
Her head jerked up as she digested that information. “But why have we come here” she asked.
“it’s the only place I know where you would be safe, no one would ever suspect you were here.”
She didn’t understand what he meant by that but he spoke before she could ask, “I will explain when we go in, can you walk?” He asked.
She nodded slowly, “your mum and siblings, they are inside?” She asked looking towards the house.
Taking a deep breath, he nodded.
“But Hanifah said you haven’t come here since…”
“Yes,” he said, “but it’s okay, I called mummy while you were asleep, she is waiting for us.”
Risha’s eyes filled with fear, “I can’t go in Farhan, not like this, I can’t face them.”
He exhaled deeply, closing his eyes, “it’s not easy for me either Risha, I am more ashamed than you, believe me, but I have to keep you safe and this is the only way I know how.”
“Safe from what?” She asked genuinely confused.
“I will explain,” he said opening the door.
“Farhan…” she started to argue but stopped as his hand squeezed hers gently.
“Please Risha, just do as I ask, ok?”
His touch sent tremors through her entire being, involuntarily, she found herself nodding at those magnetic eyes.
“Thank you” he whispered stepping out.
Slowly she stepped out also, her legs feeling very weak, she staggered and almost fell as dizziness overcame her, but he was beside her in a flash, his arms around her, steadying her, she felt warm as he touched her, his closeness giving her support and making her feel weak at the same time.
“Can you walk,” he asked patiently, “or should I carry you?”
“No, no I can manage” she answered shyly.
Slowly they walked up to the door, the security light was on, sending a beam of light over the front yard. Farhan’s face held the apprehension he was feeling inside. Obviously, he was as scared as she was maybe more. After such a long time, he was returning to mother, to his siblings, to his home, to the family he had abandoned, because of her, how would they react, she wondered, she didn’t understand why he had brought her here or what he meant by keeping her safe. However, she was too weak to argue and her mind was still in disarray.
When they reach the door, he raised his hands to knock but the door flew open before he even knocked, a graceful looking lady stood there, a broad smile on her face, “oh welcome, welcome” she said coming forward to hug a petrified Risha. “what took you guys so long” she asked stepping back and holding Risha’s hand, walking in with her, leaving Farhan no less shocked than Risha’s. This was never what he had expected, granted, mum was the most forgiving soul on earth, but this was just too much. He hesitated as he said a silent prayer before walking in.
Mrs Nazeer was all smiles, she motioned Risha to sit beside her on the sofa, hands in hands, “you look so beautiful daughter, so beautiful, it’s a shame we had to meet at such sad times. I am so sorry about your father, may his soul rest in peace.”
Risha didn’t know what to say to such kindness, she looked towards Farhan her eyes showing her confusion, he just shrugged his shoulders as if to say, “don’t ask me I am as surprised as you.”
Slowly, he walked up to them standing by the sofa, he didn’t know how to proceed, mum hadn’t even spared him a glance. “Assalamualaikum mummy” he whispered dropping beside her feet, his hands on her knee.
She ignored him totally, feigning ignorance as if she didn’t even hear him, after this, he kept quiet and just waited patiently, his eyes full of shame.
“Farida” Mrs Nazeer called, come take her to her room, you must be tired dear,” Mrs Nazeer said squeezing her hand affectionately. “Rest, we will get to know each other tomorrow. A graceful looking lady walked out from somewhere, she was a female version of Farhan, except for the height, “definitely his sister,” Risha thought. She smiled at Risha, then at Farhan before coming to take Risha’s hand in hers, gently, she motioned Risha to follow her, her voice soft and gentle. “I am so sorry for your loss, we heard the News on TV, may his soul rest in peace dear, I know how it feels to lose a father, do take heart” she whispered.
Risha just let herself to be led on, everything was too strange for her to understand occasionally, she looked at Farhan who still sat beside his mother’s feet, his face down in shame, evidently, Mrs Nazeer was bent on ignoring him.
“Don’t worry about him,” the Farida was saying in a gentle voice, “mum won’t stay angry at him much longer, she is only pretending, I bet she is dying to hug him right now, but he has to be taught a lesson,” she said smiling.
“I don’t understand,” Risha said when she could finally speak.
“Don’t worry Farida replied her smiling, “just try to get some rest now, you look very tired. I will bring you your dinner immediately, you have to eat something, you look really weak.”
Risha was taken to a room that had a big bed in it, Farida sat beside her, helping her to take off her shoes, “wait for me a while, I will be back with dinner, the bathroom is over there if you need it.” With that she smiled and walked out, leaving Risha to marvel at the hospitality of these strange people, it all made sense now, whey Farhan is such an angel, only angels could bring up an angel. Despite she had no appetite, she made a valiant effort of eating as much as she could.
Farida watched her as she ate, “you are so beautiful,” she commented in appreciation, “Farry is really lucky.”
Risha just stared at her dumb founded. “Lucky?” she thought.
When finally, she was alone, she tried to think about everything that had happened, nothing came to mind, she was blank like a clean slate, in less than a few minutes, she was asleep in the one place she never imagined she would ever be welcome.
Risha awoke to a delicious fragrance greeting her sense, her hair covering her face, her entire body felt relaxed as she stretched herself, rolling over, using her hand, she moved the lock away to observe her surroundings, at first, she didn’t recognise where she was, then it all started to come back to her, her father’s death, Farhan’s mother and sister, their kindness, everything slowly dawned on her.
“Good morning” she heard his voice close, startled she tuned to find him sitting on a chair beside the bed. He had only his short-sleeved singlet on and three-quarter trousers, “or more appropriately, Good afternoon,” he smiled checking the time. “welcome to my humble home.”
She observed him, he looked fresh and relaxed, his gentle face devoid of tiredness of the day before. Then she remembered, what she had tried to do, how he had risked his life to save her, instantly, her face creased as shame enveloped her, she looked at him and was about to speak, but he cut her off.
“Don’t say it Risha, I know what you will say, there is no need to apologise, I have to admit though you gave me a fright I never want to experience again.”
“I am sorry” she whispered meekly.
“What did I just say” he asked scolding softly, coming forward, he sat beside her on the bed, his hand went hers, “you will be alright Risha”
Despite his gentle touch and the assuring tone of his voice, she couldn’t help it, the tears poured unchecked. “My father” she whispered, “I have lost him forever, I am now alone Farhan, I have no one else,” she sobbed.
“Is that why you did it, is that why you tried to take you own life?” He asked truly disappointed.
In response, she just lowered her gaze too ashamed to face him.
“You are not alone Risha, you have me and you always will.” he said reassuringly, “I understand how you must feel, but what you did was wrong and you know it yourself, you didn’t even think about the consequences, about the destination of your soul.”
At his words, she sobbed even more, bringing his hand to her chin, he raised her face to face his, “you once said you will do anything to make up for the past right? That you will do anything to make me happy right?”
She nodded.
“Then how will you do that if you are dead? Hmmn?” he asked affectionately, “I want you to promise me here and now, that you will never try such a reckless thing again, I will never forgive if you do, do you understand me?”
Avoiding his piecing gaze, she nodded, “I promise” she replied in a weak voice, the tears running free. “Farhan?”
“Hmmn?”
“Don’t leave me alone, please, just stay with me a little longer, I can’t bear to be alone even for a second, just stay close to me like this” she pleaded.
He nodded getting close, he lay himself on the bed besides her, her body beside his, touching his, her head resting on his chest, she cried silently and he just let, his arms around her soothing.
She didn’t know how long it would last, all she knew was that being there like that with him felt safe and warm, maybe it was all a dream, she didn’t care, he was near, that was all that mattered, she held him closer as her sobs subsided, they stayed like that for about an hour, she wanted to speak, to tell him how much she loved him, how much she appreciated him, how safe it felt being in his arms like this, but she was scared that if she moved, she would wake up from this dream.
“Farhan?” she barely whispered it.
He didn’t speak, he just pulled her closer to indicate he was listening.
“Is this really happening?” she asked, “could it be possible that I am in your home, in your arms? With your family in the same house? Isn’t all this incredible?” She whispered.
“I was thinking the same thing,” he replied in a dreamy voice, “but since we both haven’t woken up from this dream, then it has to be real, don’t you think?”
“I love you Farhan, no matter what, you know that right?” She whispered nudging in closer.
I know that, you silly girl,” he smiled, planting a kiss on the top of her head.
“Farhan?”
“Yes?”
“I am sorry.”
"I know"
"Will you forgive me?” she whispered her voice trembling a little.
“On one condition”
“Anything” she whispered.
“You must forgive yourself also”
“I will try.”
“Promise?”
"Promise."
“Then we are good,” he said simply as his chin came to rest on her head, he pulled her closer to him still.
“After everything, how could you still love me?” She asked him seriously, “how could you love someone like me?”
He smiled in a weird way, kept silent for a while as if thinking of a reply. “because I have come to love you more than you hate yourself.”
She gasped sweetly in the beauty of his thoughtful words; “how do you do that” she asked in a dreamy voice.
“Hmmn?”
“You know exactly what to say at all times.” She smiled, her fingers playing with his.
He chuckled, “I had to learn, I have a crazy wife”.
She laughed now pinching him playfully. “I was wondering something though” she said.
“Hmmn, what’s that?”
“Your family, your mum and sister, they were so nice to me, I don’t understand, I didn’t expect that after…you know…everything.”
“Oh that?” he laughed softly, “they know everything.”
“Really? How?”
“Luna, she told them.”
"Oh" was all she could manage.
“I was as shocked as you yesterday” he said smiling. “I didn’t expect such kindness, not after everything I did.”
“Did mother forgive you?” She asked.
He chuckled softly, “not yet, nothing I have done so far seems to have worked. She is really angry at me and rightly so, I didn’t even call, can you imagine? I can’t believe how stupid I was, no matter what, mummy would have understood. I deserve what I am getting.”
"She seems to like me though" she said shyly.
“Yes, you tend to have that effect on people, as it is, she is not the only one that likes you these days Farida wouldn’t stop taking about you, it seems you are their new star, to tell you the truth, I am a little jealous, I am the son of this house who has returned after a long time, yet everyone is falling head over heels for the daughter in law.”
"You can cry if you want, I won’t judge or tell anyone, I can be just like your dairy" she teased.
He was quiet, for a while.
"Don’t be shy", she continued to tease.
Still nothing
Then he busted out laughing, "this is so embarrassing, whatever was I thinking getting a dairy?"
"I think it's really sweet" she whispered. "It brought me to my senses"
He smiled and pulled her closer.
After a while of silence, she said, “I will speak to mummy, I will explain everything to her, she won’t be so upset with you then, right?”
“Don’t worry Risha, they won’t stay angry at me for long, they are not angry I did what I did, they understand why I had to do it. This cold silent treatment is customary, just in case I am stupid enough to try it again.”
She laughed softly, “then I guess you have to endure it patiently.”
He laughed also.
They were silent for a while, then he spoke, his voice serious, “Risha,” he said sitting her up beside him, “there is something I need to tell you about Alhaji and the reality of the situation we are in.”
At the mention of her father, she cringed and recoiled as the pain gripped her.
“I am sorry for bringing this up now” he said “but you have to understand.”
Slowly, she nodded composing herself, “when we came here, you said I was in danger. Does that have anything to do with what happened to daddy?”
He nodded, “Risha Alhaji came to see me, just some hours before the accident, he was worried for his safety and yours, he gave me his final will and made me promise to take care of you if anything happened to him, I didn’t realise it then, but it seems like he knew for certain what was coming, I think Alhaji’s accident wasn’t an accident.”
“Subhnallah” she whispered her hands pressed against her mouth to stop her from crying.
“He mentioned something about a conspiracy being plotted by his brothers. Risha, how much do you know about your uncles?”
Trying her best to control her emotions, she said, “not much, I have two uncles from daddy’s side uncle Saleem and Abbas. I don’t know much about them because daddy hardly ever spoke about them, they visited a few times when mummy was alive, I know they were never in good terms with daddy, he never told me why, and I never asked.”
Farhan nodded taking that information in, “I need to find out exactly what happened Risha, if what happened to Alhaji wasn’t an accident, then you are not safe. You will stay here until I can figure out everything” he said getting to his feet. “I need to go out now, you will be safe here I promise.”
“What about daddy?” She asked with difficultly, “has his janazah (funeral) been performed?”
“Yes,” he whispered, “I attended it this morning when you were asleep, I didn’t want to disturb you.”
She nodded her expression pained, “I was really a bad daughter.”
“On the contrary, you were the light of his life, he really loved and appreciated you. Now all you have to offer him is your earnest prayers, that is the only thing that can benefit him now.”
She nodded.
He turned to leave but her hand held his affectionately, slowly, her fingers intertwined with his intimately. “Farhan, please be careful, don’t put yourself in any danger, if anything happens to you, I won’t survive it,” she said in matter of fact way, if its daddy’s wealth they want, just let them have it.”
He nodded and gently squeezed her hand affectionately; “I will be careful” he promised. Before he walked out, he smiled at her and said, “you are not alone here Risha, you are home.”
Managing a sad smile, she nodded. As he walked out, she felt her heart beat in worry for him. “Please Allah, keep him safe please.”