I cleared my throat as Luke tilted his head a little, his lips slightly parted.
"It is fine if you don't want to...it's just a childish whim anyway." He smiled at me and turned away, then left the kitchen.
But that was not what not what was on my mind. My husband...no, he is not my husband right now, but...I took in a deep sigh as I turned to the entrance. He was sitting on the couch, his head lowered, probably looking at something.
"Uhm...where do you want to go?"
This is a bad idea, Karla. The guy's dead. You have to go back. This is not your time.
He turned to me, his eyes serious. "I feel like you have already done so much for me and this could be a bit..."
"Just cut the crap and tell me where we are going." Oh yeah. I almost forgot the 18 years old me was so sharp mouthed.
He seemed fascinated by my response, then laughed. "Why don't you get ready and...we leave?"
"Right now?" My eyes widened.
"Uhmm..we will be there by evening..and.."
"But today is your birthday, right?"
"Yes, but a few hours is just fine."
I nodded. "Did you come packed?"
"Let's pack you up then...we can go to my place and get my stuff. I hadn't planned on going alone anyway. So, it's sudden for me too."
I smiled and turned to my room. I wasn't sure what I had as clothes now, but I looked around and found my travelling bag.
"How long are we staying?" I yelled out to him.
"Maybe a day or two. But you should take enough so you don't get any surprises."
I hummed an answer and packed five clothes and everything I needed. It was weird how I didn't feel weird doing this. By now, I was aware that I was doing something the past me hadn't. Something the future me hadn't dreamt of doing.
I changed into a baggy joggers and hoodie, and wore my sneakers. If he was going to drive, I figured that was the best thing to wear.
"You seem to like hoodies." He said immediately I came out, dragging my travelling box. He stood, rubbing his palms together. That was when I noticed the wrist watch he was wearing.
"Nice watch." I said as I got close.
"Thanks. It was my dad's."
His dad's.
I closed my eyes. He always kept it in a gold wrist watch box, and sometimes looked at it with so much love. With eyes that spoke of regrets.
'I know this is an arranged marriage...but please respect it.'
I closed my eyes to the memory. I had been so...
"Is something wrong, Karla?"
"No," I said then opened my eyes. I was starting to think I didn't even deserve this chance.
"If there is something wrong...I do hope you tell me. Please."
I smiled. "I swear, its nothing."
He stared for a while, then silently took my bag while I turned off everything in the house. I took my phone which I rarely even used, and my card and bag, then finally closed the door.
We went into his car and he held the door open for me, then circled around to the driver's seat.
He drove in silence, and I could feel him occasionally turn to me, maybe wondering if everything was fine.
We soon stopped at his place, but it wasn't the McGregor mansion. It was a smaller place, yet a very luxurious apartment on it's own.
"This is your place?"
He nodded. "I couldn't stand being home, especially not now." He opened the door slowly and I followed behind. "She got rid of everything of my father's. It doesn't feel like home anymore. This place was actually my dad's."
I nodded my understanding. "I am so sorry."
"You don't have to be. I hate throwing a pity party in front of you."
I laughed, just so he would laugh too. It satisfied me when he did.
"Sit here and I will pack up. I won't take long."
I sat on the couch and waited. It wasn't too hard to notice how clean the place was, like no one lived there. On the table was a picture of he and his father at his high school graduation.
They had looked so happy then, their smiles infectious, I would never have thought they went through what they did together.
He came back out, switching everything off as he went.
He came to the couch where I was sitting, holding his bag and another leather bag, and before I could stand up on my own, he held my hand and with a small smile led me out of the house.
He released my hand when we got to the car, and it suddenly felt like there was too much air outside here.
"Ready?"
"Ready." I echoed.
We talked about anything and everything on our way, and he seemed to always have something to say. The Luke he was then was taciturn and reserved. This Luke was free.
I watched as the different colours of the sun reflected in his jet black hair, in the sides of his eyes and the one sided dimple on his right cheek. The way the air knocked his hair out of place, and let his loose shirt fly around.
I swallowed as I caught myself and turned away. I shouldn't be having these kind of thoughts right now.
"Want to grab a snack?" He said just as he pulled over in front of a small roadside convenience store.
I got down and followed behind him, and he asked me to pick what I wanted. I wasn't feeling too hungry, which was weird since I hadn't eaten all day, but I grabbed a soda and some cookies, then went searching for Luke.
I found him searching for groceries.
"What do you intend to do with that?" I asked, coming behind him.
He only smiled and started walking down the aisle.
"You know...I didn't want to tell you this the first time I baked, but...baking and cooking isn't just..something I picked up because mum was absent."
He paused as we got to the counter and he dropped the items, including mine.
"It is a hobby?"
He nodded. "Yes. A hobby. And I guess I want to show off to my first friend."
The gaze he gave me however...said nothing of such.