Ain’t Nothin’ But a Mistake
Hanni’s words stuck. It both inspired and bothered me. It was nice to know she believed I was capable of good things. I wracked my brains what it was that I’ve shown her that made her think so. There was the time in the place underground where I thought how cool it was to show and overexplain to her just how advanced the people who built it were, but she was unimpressed by it. The only thing that she wondered about was the lack of bugs. Other than the bullshit story about how the late monarch’s died and the hastily put-together scheme that brought on this predicament, I haven’t really done anything to impress her.
What does she even think I’m capable of?
The threat, which she didn’t hide or sugarcoat, occupied my mind longer than I wanted it to. Facing the heaps of scribbles and maps in the table in our room proved too boring a sight as I ruminated on just what she was trying to tell me so I took a walk and ended back up at the ramparts where dusk found me.
Hanni’s statements all seemed contradictory to me. On one hand she appeared to care about people but metaphorically shrugged at the fact that one side will suffer the consequences of their kingdom failing. She didn’t care which option I chose, with each one leading to their own unique consequences. She only cared that I decided on it for the right reasons. She would come with me either way, she said, but didn’t commit a timeframe. Hanni, without saying so directly, stated that she will leave at one point.
Then there’s the matter of the actual threat. It was not like her to use words that implied uncertainty, but she did so in this conversation. Of all those times she did, I had the feeling she wanted to be convinced. When it came to the possibility of me getting way over my head, however, she was quite certain what she would do. That was scary enough. I will always find you.
The hell does that even mean?
As the first stars appeared in the sky, my thoughts drifted to the options laid out before me. I did not care about the people. Spend enough time with any group of them and they became insufferable to be with. I only cared about the children and how we would fare if the wind blew one way or the other. I also found out that I cared about Hanni. Her company. A lot. I began to question myself why I was thinking the way I was thinking and when I started thinking as such.
On the one hand, we could go to back to Osea, reward or no reward. Get things in order and find Bira a gartutri as a mentor. Being that the kingdom was aggressive in acquiring them, and they were supposedly rare, that whole venture could take eight months to a year. I still wasn’t sold in the idea that Bira, or Jibel for that matter, were somehow divinely tinged but, selfishly, I leaned towards spending more time with Hanni. If that is what it took to lengthen it, so be it.
On the other hand, there was the prince’s offer. That would take at least a year. Three at the most if it goes slow but smoothly. If everything went right, I would come back set for life. Free to do whatever I wanted to do and the children assured of the best possible choices in everything. If it didn’t work out, I would be in a unique position to see things as they happen and react accordingly. All of those upsides paled in comparison to what I, apparently, wanted the most.
Minutes before I heard footsteps heading in my direction, my mind was already made up.
“I’s told I’d find ye ‘ere.” Litoc said, handing me a bowl.
“What’s that?”
“Trano.”
“Trano? You could command the kitchen to cook you up a feast and you chose trano?” I said, accepting the bowl and a wooden spoon.
“I wasn’t very fond o’ it, ta be ‘onest, but it took a flavor o’ its own when we started sellin’ it.”
“You mean when you started exploiting my ideas for your benefit? Is this poisoned?”
“What do ye mean poisoned? Why would I do that? Not much exploitin’ ta be done if yer dead!” He chuckled as he blew on his spoon.
At least one of us is in a good mood.
“Glad to know you admit it.”
“Ye made it too easy. Everythin’ was yer idea. Can’t blame a man fer takin’ advantage o’ that! So, anyway, ye done plottin’ the downfall o’ Silaron?”
The question caught me off-guard. I eyed him suspiciously, but he paid me no mind, choosing to stare at his bowl instead.
“Just about. Not that it needs any help. It was bound to fall regardless, especially with your idea of rightful vengeance.”
“I could’ve pulled it off cleanly, I know I could ‘ave.”
“You didn’t have a solid plan. You were just going to go there and raise havoc. That’s why you readily accepted what I put forth.”
“Ha. Yers was just much better. I could ‘ave done it but yers was better. Just the possibility o’ Amreth losin’ sleep fer months ‘fore ‘e falls is enough fer yer plan ta be better than killing ‘im outright.”
“Was?”
“Is. Jakeli an’ I ‘ave been runnin’ the numbers an’ timelines all afternoon. Listen Jorj, I appreciate ye, I really do. Well, we do. First ye gave us time, then ye gave us a fightin’ chance. We overstepped askin’ ye ta go.”
“That you did.”
“I apologize, that was too much. I’m just stayin’ ta see we go through each detail meticulously, choose the correct people ta send an’ we’ll ‘ead back to Osea.”
“You’re coming?”
“Ha. If ye’ll still ‘ave me. An’ if ye can wait. If not, I can arrange wagonfuls o’ goods an’ soldiers ta guard ye on yer way come sunup.”
“Guess I’m not getting that inn then, huh?”
“If it were up ta me, I’d build ye two Jorj. Jak needs no convincin’ but ‘e’s a little tied up at the moment so ‘e probably won’t be able ta see ta it personally anytime soon.”
“All he needs is to raise his hands.”
“That is true but Jak, see, e’s really grateful ta ye, ‘e is. An’ ‘ed want ta do that ‘imself, if I still remember ‘ow he is.”
“What’s keeping him busy then? You’re here.”
“The soldiers we’ll be sendin’. Mine’ll be ‘ere tomorrow. ‘es wantin’ ta do the same so we can send them out soon.”
“Well, go and tell him not to do it until I’ve looked your preparations over.”
Litoc’s spoon hung in the air as he stopped to regard me with knotted brows.
“What are ye sayin’ Jorj?”
“I’m saying don’t do anything until I’ve revisited every aspect of the plan.”
“Don’t be sayin’ thin’s yer not meanin’, Jorj. ‘snot a jokin’ matter.”
I let the silence hang as I considered what I was about to say, reviewing my motives and the probable outcomes. Not that there was much to review. I did anyway and only succeeded in sowing more doubts in my head.
Aaah, fuck it.
“See Litoc,” I spoke facing him, looking into his expectant eyes, “I really, really want an inn.”