OLIVE
I don't know what Natasha had been telling Nolan before I came in but I heard her tell him to leave. I heard her tell him I wasn't going to leave my pack because of him. She was right. I wasn't going to make that decision before and I am not going to make it now. When I waited for him to come to stop me, I had thought of changing my mind. I had feared I might change my mind if he shows up. I had thought I will reject my pack for him. That was the only way I thought I could prove to him that I love him. That I am willing to sacrifice the things that make me happy, for him.
But having waited for a long time, hoping he would show up and he never did, I realized I was wrong. I shouldn't change my mind. I should not think of staying back because I will regret it. As I stepped my legs out of the fire pack gate, I made up my mind never to show up again at the fire pack. Never to think of seeing him again. I made up my mind to leave with the pain and never love anyone again.
Never to give my heart to anyone again. Never to trust anyone as trusted him. Never to think about him again. I wished I was pregnant. I wished that one night we shared will produce a fruit I can always look at to remember. I made up my mind to leave our territory and settle down in a place where no one will find us.
But seeing him now, I was afraid I might change my mind. "You should follow her advice and leave," I told him but I wouldn't listen.
He just wouldn't leave and let me carry out my plans. Instead, he kissed me and I couldn't resist. I wanted to slap myself for letting him kiss me and for kissing him back. I wanted to slap myself for letting him trail his hand around my body and for morning in pleasure. I wanted to slap myself for letting him lift me and drop me on the kitchen table. I wished I had stopped him when he made love to me for the second time, right in the kitchen. I wished someone had walked in before things got that far. I wished I had stopped him from the beginning.
I ran out of the kitchen having no destination. I must have run deep into the wood cause I have myself for letting him have me for the second. Why can't I resist him?. Why do I keep longing for him in a situation like this?. I changed into my wolf and ran deep into the wood. I wasn't sure where I was going but I know I wanted to go far away from him. I wanted to go to a place where I don't have to see him again.
I was abandoning my pack and him again. Just like I did when I found out he was the ruthless alpha. I was running away just like I always do. I just want to be far from him as much as I can and that is what I am doing right now.
**
I opened my eyes weakly. I had changed back to my human self and was very cold. There was no cloth to warm me cause my clothes got torn in an attempt to change. I wrapped myself, hoping someone would show hope to help me. "What if I get raped?" I thought. I shivered at the thought of that. I wasn't with any cloth and was prone to rape if anyone decided to. "You should mind-link our mate," my wolf said but I wasn't going to do that.
I had blocked him from mind-linking me. I needed time alone. I needed to be alone. I needed to be far from him.
Staying in my human self won't be safe so I changed back into my wolf. I was tempted to return home. To return into his arms and tell him I was sorry for running off. I wanted to tell him I missed him so much but I couldn't. I was ashamed I told him to go and yet I couldn't resist him.
I howled loudly, hoping someone will hear me. Luck was on my side. A woman showed up. She had come to get some woods and had noticed me. She moved closer to me. "Are you hurt?" She asked. I stared at her not knowing if I should trust her or not. "You can trust me. I want to help". I moved away from her and she sighed. She pulled off her coat. "You can change now and wear this. It's cold". She dropped the coat on the floor. "I will stand over there" she pointed at a tree close by.
I picked the coat up with my mouth and ran to a close-by tree to change. After changing I return to where she's been standing. "You're beautiful," she said. "You must be cold. Is your pack close by?"
"I don't want to go back. I don't want to return to my pack"
"Did something happen?"
I nodded. "C-can I stay with you, for a while?"
She smiled. "I need someone to talk to. Let me get some wood and then we will go home"
"Thanks" I cooed
We got to her house and she gave me some clothes to wear. She also gave me some food to eat and a place to sleep. Her daughter, Mira was kind to me. She sees me as the sister she never had. And I was thankful her mother did not ask any further questions, why I don't want to go back to my pack. "You can stay as long as you want," she told me and could only thank her.
I wasn't sure if the decision I made about running away was wrong or not but I know that is what I need right now.
**
I missed everyone but I couldn't go back. I could not go back because I don't know how to face them. I don't know what to tell them. I have no good reason for leaving in the first place. "How long will you run away?" Mira asked
"I can't go back" I replied
"Don't you think they will be worried about you?"
"I know, but this is the best option"
"To stay away from him?. How long will you be able to resist the pain you feel?"
"As long as I can"
"And your baby?. Do you want him to grow up without the love of his father?"
I sighed. Just a few days ago I realized I was pregnant. I was told I was five weeks gone. Five weeks since I ran away. It's five weeks since I last saw him. "I..."
"Olive. I understand you are afraid but don't you think it's time you go back home"
"I can't"
"Don't you worry about how he feels?"
"I do"
"And you do love him right?"
"I love him. I do"
"And he loves you too"
I nodded. "He loves me"
She held my hand. "You should return. They will be so worried about you. I will go with you if you want me to"
"Mira..."
"Please, stop hurting him and yourself. Don't deny your baby, his father"
"I..."
"Please"
"What if he doesn't love me anymore?"
She smiled. She placed her hand on my chest. "Your heart will tell you. It won't lie to you and you know that"
"What..."
"Everyone you told me about, Bella, Nigel, Ella. Every one of them, I can tell you they miss you so much"
I sighed. "I will go back"
She hugged me. "You will be fine. I promise"
**
We were standing at the gate of the fire pack. I had fone there straight base on Mira's advice. She said I should see Nolan first. The guards who saw me welcomed me. They were happy to see me and I regretted leaving them behind. "Is the alpha around?" I asked
"No. He's been at the mountain pack since you left" one of the guards answered.
I blinked away the tears threatening to fall. He stayed. He stayed because of me. He left his pack to stay in mine for me but I couldn't do the same for him.
I sniffed. "And Nigel, I mean the Beta?"
"He says at the mountain pack too but only comes around once in a while for the personal affairs of the pack"
"Who has been taking care of the pack?"
"Duncan has"
"I will go see him"
I went with Mira to see Duncan. He was happy to see me. I cried when I saw him and told him how sorry I am for causing so much trouble with my absence. He told me he was happy I came back that is all that matters. He told me to go back home. Nolan is waiting for me. He's been worried about me and had refused to leave saying he would only if I showed up. "Go bring our alpha back home," Duncan said patting me
**
Everyone was surprised to see me. I had thought they would resent me but they ran to hug me. We couldn't hold our tears. Bella and Ella. I was happy to see them again "I'm sorry" I cried. "I'm so sorry"
"I-it's good to see you again" Ella cooed.
"Good to see you, Olive," Bella said
I looked around for Nolan. "W-where is Nigel?" I asked instead
"You mean, Nolan?" Bella smiled
"You should go see him. He's been worried sick about you" Ella answered
"He hasn't left your room since you left," Bella said
"He kept blaming himself for letting you go" Ella added.
I felt bad hearing what Nolan has to pass through because of me. "I will go see him"
After introducing Mira to Bella and Ella, I left her with them and went to see Nolan. When I got to my room, I was reluctant to go in but summoned up the courage. I opened the door slowly. Nolan was sitting down. He stood up when he saw me. "I..."
He ran towards me. "I-I'm sorry" I cried
"Don't you ever think of leaving me again? I might die"
"I-i'm sorry. I am so sorry. I shouldn't have left you. I..."
He placed his finger on my lips. "I love you. That is all that matters. I am happy to see you again"
"I shouldn't have..."
"I understand your reason for leaving. I should have stopped you from leaving. I should have..."
"You passed through a lot. I should have understood better"
"You've put up with me for too long. I should have been there for you when you need me most" he said
"I'm sorry"
"I'm sorry too". He hugged me. "I've missed you"
"I've missed you too"
Nolan and I settled our differences. The ones we should have settled for a long time. I told him we were going to have a baby soon and he was happy about it. The rest accepted the good news with joy. I told the elders about it. There was no way I will stay in the mountain pack and have my baby even though Nolan was willing to compromise. I couldn't let him compromise for my sake again.
I was willing to let go of the pack for someone else if that will help me stay with Nolan. My pack members supported my decision. They were willing to let me go or so I thought. When I gathered my things to leave the packhouse, they stopped me. "You don't have to worry about us. We will be here and join hands with the fire pack we are willing to join them and become one"
I cried when I heard that. "Nigel can be in charge here since he is the Beta of the fire pack. We are not much we don't need a new alpha"
I couldn't stop thanking them for making such a decision. "We can build houses in the spaces between us to join the two packs together"
"Or maybe schools and industry" another added.
"Thank you, all" was the only words I could say.
**
It's been five months since I returned to the fire pack. My stomach is protruding already and my baby is fine. We have been able to start the building of new schools and companies to cover up the space between the two packs. Everything has returned to normal and I am happy things have turned out this way between us.
Bella and Nigel got married a few weeks after ours. Ella and jack will be getting married after I give birth. She wants me to be her maid of honor. Mira visit every time. Nolan and I decided to take a stroll. We walked down the street, holding hands. Nolan stopped walking and stared at me. "You know I love you, right?"
I nodded. "I love you, too"

THE END