"LIAR!" All of their eyes widened when I left my seat with a bang while pointing the arnis at Marc. I pursed my lips to stop myself from crying but in the end, I started trembling in tears. Marc also stood up and came closer to me, but before he could, I hit his shoulder with the arnis.
Note: Arnis is the Philippine National Martial arts and combat sports that was developed by indigenous people for defense.
"Liar!" I hit him again on the other shoulder not minding how he groaned in pain. Marz stopped what they were doing and called me but had no intention of stopping me.
"I trusted you! You even said you love me but I'm starting to doubt my feelings for you... because you're keeping a secret from me? Why?! WHY?!" I paused to breathe the frustration of this trust issue repeated cycle which was the root of all the damage to me. I can't determine where the boiling heat in my blood is coming from. I hit him again and again but I only know one thing. I'm hurt because he's keeping secrets from me and I feel like... everyone I trust is keeping secrets from me.
"I haven't even recovered the last time and now I'm so scared to wake up for another revelation without having time to prepare myself. The hell give me a f*cking break!" I don't know anymore, I don't know what to do, who to trust. I am very tired. My eyes bawled with tears and I can feel my veins showing on my neck.
"Who else is hiding something from me? How about you Marz? Hazel? Jia? Are you hiding something from me too? Just tell me!" I pointed at them one by one with my arnis but they shook their heads at the same time and then stood up to stop me but before they could touch me, I faced Marc again and showered him with sharp stares.
I waited for him to say something, but he remained silent. I was disappointed when his eyes looked down at the ground. Because of that, I attacked him again using my arnis, but this time, he blocked it using his bare elbows. I keep on attacking him and he's just letting me do what I want. No one attempted to step in and stop me. I twirled my arnis and sped up my attack, releasing all the anger circulating my whole system then at the last blow I pivoted, then jumped to smash my arnis at his thighs making him kneel down, enduring the pain.
"Jess, you're drunk. Stop fighting and give me your arnis!" Eventually, Marz pulled me away from hurting Marc again, but I was not yet satisfied and I pushed him to the ground.
Under the moonlight, my tears were flowing like a forlorn river. He quickly pulled my vulnerable wrist as he stood and do the disarming maneuver that caused me to wince in pain and let go of the arnis on my right hand. To his advantage, he made me turn my back against him and locked me in his chest, his arms around my shoulders restraining me from attacking him.
"LET GO OF ME! AHH!" I screamed the remaining anger inside me. Using my elbow, I gave him a powerful strike to his side that left him no choice but to let go and staggered backward. I exhaled forcefully as soon as I got away and pointed the arnis at him who was groaning in pain on the ground, surrendering, defeated.
"Jess, please stop! Enough! Please!" He was down on his knees begging.
"What's going on with you guys? I told you Jia that we shouldn't give her that anymore." The twins were already restraining both of my shoulders while Marz grabbed the arnis that I was gripping tightly. When I got my breath back to normal, I realized what I have done.
I massaged my temples when I felt a stinging pain in my head and along with the weakening of my knees that gradually drained me, I suddenly found myself in a vague surrounding, spinning, and distorting images before my eyes as everything went black.
I was taken aback when I felt someone rub a warm towel on my forehead, my arms, and my neck. When I slightly opened my eyes, I saw an indistinguishable blur of him. Concern and remorse were written in his eyes and when scenes started to flash in my mind about earlier. I pushed myself to get up, but my body was too heavy leaving me no choice but to remain silent and wait for him to speak.
"I want to tell you. I really want to tell you... but I love you Jess, and I don't want to hurt you." I shut my eyes closed when I felt his palm caressing my cheeks then I slowly felt his breathing on my face. For the second time, I heard those words again correctly, clearly from him and a warm kiss landed on my forehead.
Why is he so good to me even though I hurt him badly? Why does he still take care of me? If I had met him earlier and we weren't in this situation, maybe we're both happy now and I wouldn't hesitate to let him go because he's not difficult to love.
"I'm sorry for hurting you," he whispered in my ears, and I felt his warm tears pricking my cheeks. I didn't move an inch when he lay beside me, my eyes were still closed, listening more from his side.
"The truth is, I can't bear to see you get hurt again when your Daddy tells you the truth because... I know you are struggling. I would like to ease your pain but I am not in a position to precede your father. I hope you will forgive me if I kept a secret from you. Please don't hate me the day you know everything." He squeezed my hand giving me comfort and in my blurred vision, sincerity was reflected in his eyes under the light of my tent. I felt his embrace from the side, and I still acted asleep.
My heart thudded uncontrollably when I felt his warm embrace, his warmth flowing through my body and suddenly, I felt his lips locked on mine that caused my eyelids to flutter. Someone tell me this isn't a dream.
"Good night," he whispered before leaving my tent.
The effect of alcohol confused my mind as if I was having a false awakening, but whispers were circulating around me that made me roll to the opposite side.
"It's okay. Look what happened, Jess overdid it. You know she's not a drunkard like you." I curled my toes when I heard the voice of Marz.
"I just gave her what she wants! Is that bad?" Jia defended and I can already visualize her arched brows almost floating up her hairline. Eventually, I decided to move and get up to disrupt their scorching argument.
"What time is it?" I broke the tension between them, and their attention turned to me.
"It's early 5 am." Hazel simply checked her watch and twitched her lips side by side.
"Jess? Are you okay? You're not in pain or something?" I immediately opened my eyes to Marz's voice and looked around inside the tent, trying to remember if what happened earlier was real or not. I cupped my head when I felt that stinging pain again, then they helped me lie down.
Marz's frustrated face almost broke another catfight record if it was not for Hazel whose cold stares created a blizzard in between the two. It's a good thing they didn't continue arguing because my headache would probably get worse.
"Jess, are you okay? Don't let the bodyguard and driver report what happened oh. Please, Tito will be really mad, maybe he won't let us go out like this next time." Marz was scratching his head, getting nervous on going home tomorrow.
"Where is he?" All their eyes turned to me, tilting their heads wearing a goofy grin. I frowned when they shared meaningful eye contact with each other before turning their eyes back to me.
"He's outside," Hazel answered then they all went closer to me and helped me to get back up.
"Jess, do you want to share something with us?" Marz's brows moved up and down and I forced my brain cells to retrieve all the scenes I have to remember but all of them were unresolved images in my head.
"I really didn't mean it, Marz. Is he mad?" My eyes were restless when I held Marz's hand. I was worried and... guilty.
"I don't know, Jess, but when you see the marks of your good beating, I'm sure you'll feel sorry for him. And why would you hurt someone you love right guys?" Marz angrily swat my hand and crossed them on his chest.
"What is that secret anyway? We were all clueless last night. You are so mad and talking insane stuffs that we don't understand." Jia raised her eyebrows and anticipated my response.
"And by the way, he said he loves you right and you like him too so… what's up?" Hazel asked me confused then adjusted the zipper of the tent after inspecting that there was no one outside.
"I don't know." I let out a heavy sigh because I'm confused as well.
"The question is, are you ready to jump into a relationship again? After all that happened?" All eyes darted at me waiting for my answer but before I could, Marc called us to go outside for breakfast.
"Let's talk later," I assured them before we went out of the tent, and everyone enjoyed their breakfast except for me who can't even look at all the bruises he had because of me.
The breakfast was filled with deafening silence and everyone was not even looking at each other. After a sped-up eating session, we prepared the things and the tent because we were going down the mountain with the painful sores of our bodies from yesterday. Marz supported me on the way down and I'm really stuck with him because I'm not ready to talk to Marc. I feel more guilty as the miles went far.
"Why did I almost finish the tuba last night? That was so stupid!" I didn't notice I was mumbling like an idiot.
"Hey! Are you saying I'm stupid?! I just want a happy crush when we go back to Cebu." Marz almost became upset when I was just speaking to myself.
"No Marz, I was stupid last night... that's what I was saying." I clarified.
I poured out my anger after all he did for me. I look like an ungrateful b*tch when he helped me with my revenge plot, he offered his time just for me to forget all my problems, he took me to places to escape and run away for a while, and in the end, I doubted him, and I even hurt him.
What kind of friend am I?
I'm so despicable.
We went down much faster than we went up yesterday and when we got to the bottom our driver and bodyguard were waiting. We sent them back to the house first so that when they come back here they can help us with the other things. As we were hiking back home, Marz was laughing while recording a video for his vlog.
While Marc and I didn't say a word, he just carried the things silently until we got home. Even though we all fell asleep last night, we still collapsed on the bed after paying our respects to the elders.
"Best, are you asleep?" I elbowed Marz because I really couldn't bear not asking him.
"Why bestie?" He rolled to the other side and gave me that unruly face.
"Last night, were you the one who took care of me?"
"No," he quickly gave me that disgusting face as if I really went wild last night. Did I?
"Marc volunteered. Besides, I don't want you to beat me with your arnis. You were so mad last night! You looked possessed, we thought you really lost it." He showed me goosebumps covering his arms then rubbed it to put it back to normal.
Suddenly, I smiled unconsciously when I remembered that kiss last night, at least it was not a dream. On the other hand, I'm afraid to know the truth.
"My ghad, you looked possessed again. Can you stop that?" His horrified now and changed the topic.
"I'm curious, what's the real reason why you're like that by the way?" Marz pulled my wrist and lowered his voice signing me to whisper the secret but after looking around to confirm that no other person was listening to what I was about to tell him, Jia and Hazel got up immediately like popcorn.
"Yes! Tell us!" Jia whispered excitedly then all their ears came close to me. I whispered it to Marz and he also passed it to Jia and then Jia to Hazel like crazy kids being wary not to spill any relayed message. Their reaction was remarkable. It was written on their faces that they couldn't believe what they found out and I think we have the same interpretation, but we're not yet sure.
"Anyway Jess, answer the question. You do like him, yes or yes? I'll support you promise," Hazel asked teasingly. I hesitate to nod because I still have a lot to deal with those feelings.
"Same. You guys look good together." Jia pushed me a little and Hazel also did, now I look like a bouncing ping-pong ball.
"But." I heaved a deep sigh and they repeated what I said in unison loudly and I hushed them because someone might hear us.
"BUT?!"
"I hurt him, and I have one last thing to do."
"Then apologize to him, so easy!" Jia bragged like a 0-failure-expert and then gestured us to stand.
"Wait, I thought your revenge plot was over. Best, there's nothing wrong with letting yourself be happy again." Marz hugged me and the twins also did, locking me in their bone-cracking hugs. Predictably, it made me cry because, after everything that happened, they're here to support me.
"And whatever else you do in the future. We're not going home until that's over because we'll be flying back to Cebu together and get drunk before college." Marz pretended that he's holding a glass of mojito celebrating. I sobbed more when the twins also cried with me. Then I realized that I was not yet thanking them for everything they have done for me.
"I'm really sorry last night for being intoxicated. Thank you because you didn't leave me behind and you chose to accompany me here even though I know you should be bonding with your family." I removed the hair that was blocking my face and the twins wiped my tears then we sat again on the floor with a mat, the four of us were crying and we were in a circle like a group discussion.
"We're family since we were kids." Hazel wiped her tears and we hugged by pair.
"You know what I learned from your revenge mission with Marc?" Marz carefully wiped away his tears so as not to ruin his mascara.
FLASHBACK
We are all here in the room where Kuya Marc and I checked in, the four of us are sitting on the bed. Marz is next to me, and behind us are the twins. Kuya Marc is standing in front like a professor who will explain what we should do. I intentionally disturbed their morning sleep since we don't have any more time to discuss. That explains why they're wearing their comfortable PJs, messy hair, and oily faces.
"Hey, your roommate is so gwapo. It's a good thing you didn't take advantage of him last night because if I-" Hazel quickly covered Jia's mouth because she was too loud and Kuya Marc just smirked.
Note: Gwapo means handsome.
"Yes, even me." Marz supported and I cringed at their statue reaction which is the #drooling/daydreaming pose.
"Don't mind my twin, Captain, she just lacks sleep," Hazel said shyly then arranged the two because I was ashamed of them. I cupped my forehead because they are shipping us even though Kuya is just really a big brother to me.
After 30 minutes of explaining to us the setup, the sequence, designating who will do this for the plan to work, Marz and Jia automatically grasped my wrist from opposite sides and looked at me waiting for my explanation for all this fuss.
"I'm going to steal a cellphone? Is there no other way?" Jia reacted still can't absorb what she was going to do. I nodded then she pointed at herself, looked down unbelievably, then back to me.
"I'm going to do a magic trick just so you can be together in the horror booth?!" Marz exaggerated and placed his palm on his face with big eyes shocked then rolled himself with a blanket.
"We can't do this." Hazel stood frustrated.
"Let's have a trip to Bukidnon as your reward" Marc smiled and Jia and Marz automatically jumped in excitement and hugged Marc as if they won the lotto.
END OF FLASHBACK
"I was very nervous when I took the phone after the crew poured orange juice on Ivy's swimsuit just to put a tracker on it. My gosh, do you know that I even prayed 'Our Father' in the bathroom before I returned the phone to her? I don't even pray the rosary my gosh yet I did. I even bribed the crew just to have him do that." Jia narrated nervously as she remembered everything just for the sake of getting Ivy's location. I tried not to laugh while she was telling the story, but still I did. The nervousness never left her body, how much she panicked that time even though we were just here in the room.
"You know when I pulled out the rolled paper and then Marlo was supposed to be with Jess in the horror booth, that was the most nerve-racking moment of my life. I thought I will die in that moment because I don't know how to exchange papers that fast and no one will notice. I'm really lucky that Captain rescued me." I frowned at what Marz said because I didn't notice that at the reunion. Well, it was late night and everything happened so fast.
"How did that happen?" I asked Marz with a frown and he squealed again.
"Oh! She's curious about her future boyfriend and how fast he is. Anyway, it was like this, while he was serving drinks, he didn't know the timing when I was about to draw the paper. He put a piece of paper with Jacob's name written next to my drinks so when Ivy reacted, that was the paper I showed. Oh, isn't it amazing?" Marz narrated like an electric shock ran to his my body while the three of us nodded because it was so good, and even though I knew everything about the plan, I didn't really notice it. It ran smoothly.
"Hey! It's 12 pm, let's go out. It's time to go because we still have remaining goals in the checklist." Hazel interrupted and we all got up frantically to change our clothes for the horseback riding without getting any sleep.
The last goal of our stay here is... we're going to join in harvesting vegetables on the farm before we go home tomorrow early in the morning. We each got dressed and wore the best clothes for Marz's vlog and after getting ready we went out to the highway together where the horses we rented were waiting then my friends first choose a horse. Marz was disappointed with his first choice of color white because Marc didn't allow him no matter how much he begged.
"It's unfair, is that for Jess?" Marz seemed sullen but he just stole a kiss from Marc on the cheek and then chose another horse lining up on the road.
Marc came to me wearing a lively smile unlike before who was quiet then he extended his hand to me. I stared at his face and his smile made me feel so relieved but when I looked down at his hand with a wound, I immediately covered it with a band-aid.
"I'm sorry."