Chapter 27
The time is exactly 6:45 am. Jia is exhausted beyond her thoughts. The sweat is dipping to her temples. She feels like exercising when all she does is walk upstairs. The members look at Jia with awe. Surprise is evident on their faces and Juno furrows his brows while Yejun gives her a handkerchief. Jia accepted it without any thoughts. She is tired and nothing would prevent her from accepting help.
Penelope asked Jia if she's alright. Jia nodded her head while catching her breath.
"What happened to you?" Hyuk asked as he stared intently at Jia.
"I commute and walk here from the gate," Jia said. Her eyes are gleaming with pride but her expression is complicated. She looks about to pass out.
"Yumi will make a fuss if she sees you like that." Hyuk continued only to earn an agreeing nod from Penelope.
"Hehe, I feel that my body became stiff. I tried to exercise but my stamina is humiliating enough." Jia wiped her sweat with Yejun's handkerchief. He studied Jia as she carefully used it and fanned herself.
"Use this Jia, you're pale." Penelope handed her a mini fan and Jia accepted it with gratitude. She laughs afterward, accomplishing simple tasks she would never have done in the past.
--
Yumi arrived at exactly 7:00 am and looked worn out like Jia. The members look at them with amusement. Jia explained it after Yumi asked Jia about the distinct reaction from the members.
"The mini-concert will start at 3:00 pm sharp. I talked to our advisor and she said that there are visitor-sponsors that will attend the concert. They created the event because of the orphanage request, thanking the people. There is also a feeding program but the main event is to attract couples in adopting children. Well, our club's only concern is to perform. Don't get pressured and act like usual." Hyuk explains everything in detail. He handed them papers with a schedule written on them.
"So, the unit will be the Penelope-Yejun pair. Hyuk, Juno, and Yejun as the background playing instruments. Penelope and I are performing solo." Yumi leveled her eye to Hyuk asking for confirmation while Jia nodded satisfied with the schedule.
"But how about Jia?" Penelope asked, furrowing her brows but still looking pretty.
"I hope that she could perform solo like the two of you but... It's her first time." Hyuk's eyes are glued to the paper while speaking his thoughts. He purposely cut off his words
"It's fine. Jia could sing." Yejun's stare is so intense that Jia swallows her voice. She frowned but Yejun didn't break his gaze. Gawking at the uncomfortable Jia.
"I agree. Jia has a nice voice." Yumi mutters. Everyone is agreeing but Jia has no confidence to perform in this kind of event.
"I don't think..." Jia grumbled but the club members are already deciding for her stead.
"Well, I will do my best. But I will play the piano." Jia never intended to sound demanding and she hesitated to speak. Hyuk nodded without a glitch. Take notes as usual. Juno is awfully quiet. Jia never pressed any conversation with him, giving him time as long as she could. Jia only wishes that Juno will not tell any single soul about her secret and of course, to talk to her like before.
--
Practices are hard as the days pass. Every morning Jia walks intending to fix her stamina. She attends classes like usual, studies at the library, and proceeds to practice for their mini-concert.
Tomorrow is their class's rest day. They were excused from classes to prepare for the event. Juno is tasked to visit the church, organizing and mostly verifying everything before the event starts.
Jia is well adjusted to her new schedules while living differently from the past. She put her things in her bag. Yejun isn't around anymore because of other activities. Penelope quickly gets home to see her younger brother that is about to depart from the hospital. Yumi has things on her shoulder. Hyuk is busy typing to his usual working table. The door opens and Juno shows up with heavy breathing.
Jia greeted him with a small smile and got ready to come out. Juno nodded his head then went straight to Hyuk. Jia closes the door not hearing their further conversation.
Jia managed to walk to the gate without getting weary. She could feel her legs get tough and Jia is convinced that her days of struggling are eventually fruity. Her stamina is not the best but she achieved her goal. It is a challenge for Jia to execute her objective. Walking every day for the past days was pure hell on her part.
"Pfft Pfft..." Jia jumps up when she hears the car horn. She glared at the black SUV behind her. Her evil thoughts circulate like venom after she noted the plate number inside her brain. Jia realizes how horrible her mind could be. She shook her head, governing her irritation. Jia is lost in her head battle when the window opens in slow motion.
"Juno?" Jia grimaces at the boy staring at her with a smile on his lips.
"Hello. Wanna hop in?" Jia's eyes broadened from surprise. Her sentiments disappeared like a fog, clouding her mind to think of anything far from rejecting Juno.
Jia is not thinking upright when she hops inside Juno's car. She sat at the back and leaned over, relaxing her muscles because of overusing them. Jia can't blame her body for acting on its own because she wields them to the limits.
"Where are we heading?" Jia finally asked. She was prepared for confrontation. Jia is determined to talk with Juno and fix things between them. She won't run away because she only has limited time to waste thinking of her own emotions. Juno is the one who will decide and Jia will accept it no matter what.
"To that place," Juno answered vaguely. His eyes are fixed outside while the driver is quiet as gravel. Jia wants to have a conversation with him but she feels the heaviness of the atmosphere inside the car.
--
"This place is..." Jia wandered her eyes, recalling the last time she visited this place.
"Yup. I decided to tell you my own story. After you heard mine, I think that's the only thing we could do to settle our faith." Juno's angst is so obvious that Jia feels through her skin.
It's the same place she went after being lost fighting with Haru. There's a church above the hill and the extension of an orphanage. Jia was bewildered but she knows that this chit-chat isn't ordinary.
"This place is special to me." Juno started with his deep hoarse voice. "I met Hyuk here too, his cheeks are chubby but it doesn't cease his arrogance. He bullied me for an hour but when I cried while glaring at him... He apologized quickly." Juno chuckles without humor. Jia doesn't speak. She listened to him seriously.
"We became friends because his parents are also attending the church. At that time I didn't know that my parents wanted to adopt a kid. I felt betrayed at first but eventually, I learned to love the orphans. They were sweet children not broken as much as I am but their only mischief is not having parents..." Juno stopped talking. He set his gaze above the hill where the church is residing.
"I-I met a girl... I liked her the first time I saw her. She's pretty and strong. That girl was more mature than her age and many of the kids like her too." Juno shifted his gaze not meeting Jia's eye zone. "Hyuk is weird, he said that I can't like her because my parents would adopt her eventually." Juno paused anguish written in his eyes.
"Hyuk was right. My parents adopted that girl but because I like her so much... I denied her. I refused to accept her as my sister Jia... My parents love me so much that they listen to my words... She never knew it... Hyuk is the only person who knows my sins. The kids were disappointed and I could tell that she was too. My parents got busy after and we rarely visited the orphanage." Jia could feel Juno's emotions. His voice broke off while speaking.
"Then the time came when she was adopted without my knowledge. You see Jia... I am presumptuous, I thought she would stay here and I will watch her get older, and maybe someday I could confess my feelings. Hyuk said that I was a fool." Juno smiles bitterly. His brows are wrinkled as he carves his memories.
"I look for her everywhere... Asked my parents to hire someone to find her whereabouts..." Juno's dejected face crosses from his handsome face. Jia knew that at this period, it would be a tragedy.
"The people who adopted her are bad. She was abused for many years... I-I never knew it until Hyuk found her. I became a coward for not facing her. She died because she couldn't handle the pain anymore. Everything that occurred to her was my fault because I am selfish." Jia couldn't react to Juno's depressing story. She can't judge him because he was young and insensitive.
"When you tell me your story, I feel like I have hope and feel a little bit happy. I detest myself for acting selfish but I'm doing exactly… using your pain... I apologize to you Jia. I failed to be your friend. I only think of myself and I-." Juno messed up his hair searching for words to say but Jia knew those feelings... The regret of relinquishing someone precious to you. For being depressed, hurting those, and acting selfishly over and over again. She understands it very well.
"It is okay to feel that way. I also went to that hell after seeing Yumi die before my eyes. I only realized my selfishness when I saw Yejun beg for the love of his life and how I ruined Penelope's future. The sorrow of rejecting your actions and couldn't rewrite time. I was lucky when I died afterward. I have no spare time to feel the loneliness that you've been through." Jia grins, a faint smile while her heart is throbbing anxiously.
"I don't deserve second chances but God made me choose. I don't know why he decided that, I never regretted my decision until the day I died. But maybe God knows that I have no reason to live if he lets me live that time." Jia looks at Juno's messed-up face. Tears are flowing to his cheeks. Jia did not attempt to wipe it. "But maybe God knows that I have no future anymore. I only exist in the past and that's the reason why I'm here Juno... Jia in the future did not exist. I refused to live feeling terrified that I'll be back again to the way I used to be. I'm tired of hurting the people around me because of my bad decisions."
There is silence. The sun is settling and Juno remains still in his position and refuses to acknowledge Jia's opinion. He envies her for being able to go back because he will choose it too. But Juno has people who are important to him, Hyuk, his best friend, never departs his side and doesn't have the heart to hurt him directly because of his selfish decisions. While Jia did not see herself in the future, Juno dreamed of the future where he is strong enough to face his demons. Will does his best to help those in need like the girl he likes. Juno realized that he was guilty and frightened because of his past. Juno understands Jia but he isn't strong enough to follow her... He wanted to do something in the future. Juno sighs, realizing he is a big pushover.
Jia's heart ached badly. The wound she created is deeper and Jia couldn't touch the scar without her hurting herself. Haru twitched at how heartbroken she was... If she remains alive without Yumi or stays with the memories of Penelope and Yejun's death. Jia knows better that she would rather choose death.
End of chapter 27