: Where are you? I have something to tell you. >.<
I can't bring myself to reply to her text when she seems so excited. I literally just saw her and her childhood friend hugging and confessing their love to each other.
It hurts—more than I imagined.
I thought that I had finally managed to steal her attention away from him. But guess I was wrong; she probably wanted to tell me about what happened, right? That's why her text seems so happy. I can't do this. I don't want to see her talking about him.
I don't want to hear her say that they're together.
"Where were you? Nadine was looking for you. She seems excited."
Jason said as I accidentally bumped into him. Excited, huh? Of course she would be.
Maybe I should just give up now.
Every effort that I've made is useless since, in the end, she's going to choose him despite being the reason she always cries.
I hate this.
I don't understand why she keeps calling and texting me. It's been three hours; I mean, I did tell her to wait, but don't tell me she's still waiting?
Fuck.
I ran as fast as I could, back to the place where we were supposed to meet, but she's no longer there. For some reason, she makes me worried. Although I did get my heart crushed, But it's not like she knows about my feelings for her, right?
Shit.
Now that I think about it, I was the one being a jerk.
Seeing her walk in the pouring rain makes me worried. Why are you alone? Why is he not with you? Why are you walking in the pouring rain like it doesn't bother you?
𝗪𝗵𝘆 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝘀𝗼 𝘀𝗮𝗱?
I can't help but be worried, but my ego gets bigger as it consumes me. I know I was being a jerk for not explaining why I didn't show up when I told you to wait for me, but I don't know why I can't bring myself to apologise to you.
"Whoa, are you sick or something?"
Ruby asked, and I couldn't help but notice it too. Is it because of the rain yesterday?
"I feel fine; I'm probably just tired."
Although Nadine was smiling, it was obvious that she was lying. I am worried; I wanted to ask her if she's okay; I wanted to see her smiling face; I wanted to talk to her so badly but my body just won't move.
"Did something happen?"
Seeing Ethan come to the classroom to get her bag makes me worry even more. He seems genuinely worried about her too, which makes me relieved.
"Nadine's got a fever. We're going to leave school early."
Ethan told Ruby as he gave me a nod. I wonder if he knows what happened between us... I mean, I don't know if she would've told him about everything. Just maybe? I don't know. I can't help but feel troubled since I'm literally the reason she had to walk in the pouring rain since I told her to wait for me.
Fuck.
I miss her so much.
It's been two days since she's been absent, but it feels like forever. I miss seeing her happy face; I miss hearing her laughter; I miss her. So badly. I did go to check on her with Ethan's, but she was sleeping so soundly that she didn't even wake up when I touched her forehead.
"I'm sorry, this happened because of me."
I can't help but feel troubled as Ethan just keeps asking me what I mean by that.
"Are you sure you don't want her to know that the medicine and food are from you?"
Ethan raised an eyebrow as I sighed in return. What difference will it make if she knows that it was from me anyway?
She must hate me now.
"It's fine, she might not want to see me right now."
I replied truthfully as Ethan just sighed, telling me that he didn't want to meddle in my love relationship. If only we were in a relationship. That must be nice.
I'm sorry.
Two days without her make me realise how I have been so stubborn and stupid. She deserves an explanation, and I keep running away from that since I was too busy sulking.
ARGHH
I needed to tell her what really happened. I needed to tell her my feelings, how I saw her confessing her feelings to him, about me being jealous and everything.
I wanted her to look at me again.
Although I know that she's probably happy with him right now, but I just can't let go.
I'm not going to give up on my feelings.
"Ren."
Oh, how I miss her calling my name. I can't believe that the only thing on my mind was to kiss her. Shit, I'm going crazy after not seeing her for two days. Being in the classroom with her alone reminds me of the first time we stayed late to finish our homework. This feels just like that time.
But, of course, he just has to ruin everything.
"I'm coming; just wait for me."
Hearing her say that after getting a call from him makes me realise how I was never on her mind. But I don't want her to go. I don't care if I'm being selfish; I just don't want her to leave me for him. 
"Is that Koby? Can't you stay? Please."
I am desperate.
I was so desperate to make her see me that I failed to realise that he's the one that she likes. I needed to tell her everything before it was too late.
"I can't. He needed me."
Please don't say that to my face. It hurts enough to know that you choose him every time.
I hate this so much.
"I need you too. Please don't leave."
Please let me explain; let me tell you everything, so please don't look at me with those sad eyes. I don't want to see you cry because of me, since I promised that I would only make you smile.
"I can't do this right now. Can't you just let go?"
I know I deserve to be treated like this. I know you hate me for making you wait without explaining things, but I was stupid, I was jealous, and my emotions got the better of me. But it was all just excuses, since I refuse to believe that you chose him.
"I don't want to let you go."
I know I'm being selfish; heck, I seriously don't want to see her running to him and into his arms as they laugh together. I can't bear to look at her, smiling and laughing with another guy—him.
"I don't need to hear that from someone like you."
Nadine has every right to be angry and frustrated after what I did. It hurts me so much to see those expressions on her face.
I'm sorry for making you feel like I didn't care. I do, I really do.
"Let's just stop wasting each other's time. I'm done."
When she began to leave, every inch of my body just felt desperate. I don't want this to happen. Please, let me explain everything. I don't care if he's the one in her heart; I just want her to know about my feelings for her.
"Now that you finally got what you wanted, you're just going to act like we're strangers?"
What is wrong with me? Why am I so frustrated when I shouldn't be angry that she chose him over me? I was supposed to be blamed for avoiding her first. I am seriously a lost cause.
"What the heck are you on about?"
Nadine seems hurt, and I hate that I am the one who makes her feel like that.
"The second he calls you, you come running like a puppy. Are you happy now after stealing him from his girlfriend?"
𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝘀𝗮𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻.
I don't know what is wrong with me. I shouldn't be mad at her; I shouldn't have said that. For fuck sake, I was the one who suggested the idea in the first place. Seeing her teary eye makes me regret ever saying that. Don't cry, please. Although I've always told her that it was okay to cry, I just couldn't bear to look at her when I was the reason behind her tears.
"It was all thanks to you."
I could hear my heart breaking when she told me that, glaring at me as if she were pissed. She has every right to do so; I deserved this. I know I was being selfish and acting so stubbornly. I know I was acting like a stupid asshole. I know that as I am now, I don't deserve her attention.
But please, I don't want you to hate me. 
"Koby confessed his feelings for me."
𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄. 𝗜 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗱 𝗶𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗹.
"He told me that he would break up with Celine."
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽; 𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲.
"We liked each other, so what's wrong with being together?"
𝗡𝗼, 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗹𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴.
"I like him so much; I have always liked him." "It's only normal for us to be with each other, right?"
𝗣𝗹𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗷𝗼𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴. 𝗧𝗲𝗹𝗹 𝗺𝗲 𝗶𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗮 𝗹𝗶𝗲.
"I am SO happy, thanks to you."
𝗜𝗳 𝘆𝗼𝘂'𝗿𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝘆, 𝘄𝗵𝘆 𝗱𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗮𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝘆𝗲𝘀?
"Nadine, tell me you're lying."
I know that she's lying. But why? What happened? I know I shouldn't feel glad in this situation, but when she looks at me with those sad eyes, I can't help but feel stupid for letting all this happen. Having her in my arms, I don't ever want to let her go.
I'm sorry for making you cry. 
"I waited for hours like a fool, but you never came. I waited again for you to apologise and explain to me what really happened, but you never did. Why are you confusing me? Why are you doing this? Stop being so kind to me if you're just going to leave me too."
When Nadine said those words. I was dumbfounded. I was too blinded by my own ego and selfishness to realise that she was actually paying attention to me, that she actually sees that I am HERE.
"Why can't you see me?"
I can't believe this is happening. Since all this time, I wanted her to see me, but listening to her desperation and frustration made me realise that she might have actually had feelings for me too, but I was too blinded by my own jealousy to see that.
What the actual fuck have I been doing?
"I'm sorry for making you feel like that. I was an asshole, I was jealous, and I really am the worst for making you cry, despite saying that I would always make you smile. I deserved to be hated by you, but I don't want you to hate me. You deserve an explanation, and I will give it all to you, so please don't go."
Nadine continues to cry in my arms as I tell her that. Heck, an apology is not enough now after everything that I have done. But I am selfish; I don't want her to hate me. I am shameless; I want her to continue being in my arms. I don't know if I should be feeling like this.
"I can't stay. Koby needed me right now."
I knew it was too good to be true. But I can't really force her to stay with me when she looks so worried about him. Heck, I don't want to let her go.
"I understand. I will wait for you, like you waited for me. I have been waiting since forever; it's not something new to me."
I forced a smile, reassuring her that I would wait for her. She seems relieved to hear that.
"So it's okay; I don't mind waiting for a little more. Just promise me you will be back."
I am desperate. The truth is, I don't want her to go. But I deserved this for making her cry.
"I'll be right back. Please wait for me."
This is enough for now. Her reassurance is enough to make me wait a little longer. Because I have been waiting for her since forever, this will be the last time I am doing this. Since I know, she's going to come back to me. And finally leaving him—as her memory.
"I'll be waiting for you."
I have always liked her, and meeting her again makes me realise that I might like her more than I ever imagined.
So I'll be fine.