This time it all felt really annoying. There are several things that keep bothering me. Even I'm getting fed up with all this. After several times I felt strange things that really annoyed me about all of this, I felt a lot that I myself was really pathetic. In a complicated situation like this I keep getting stuck in thoughts like this and that's what always haunts me. When I started to feel a fact that was truly unusual, I even felt tired of many things that could never be replaced. I wished to myself that all of this could end and it turned out to be no different from what I've been feeling. In this utterly insane reality, I can't even believe most people that's the way it should be. I wished to myself that all of this would end and it turned out to be no good at all. I hope to myself that in the end this will only be an excuse that always sucks and every time there is always one. Many things also make my head almost explode and that's what I feel right now. I saw something that looked familiar, at that moment I saw that in reality this world was quite strange with the current conditions. I was hoping that this time things would end well and it turned out to be no use at all. This time I came back in a muddled mind and it turned out that it was the truth. After some awkward things I asked a lot of people again and until I found something that I would never see again. As soon as I listened to everything, I felt that this world was strange and that was the truth. This time I really feel like this really can't be left easily and I'm also always stuck in this damn circle.
"Wow, looks like you're confused. Is it true?" Alona asked me with a look that seemed to be mocking.
"You're so loud."
"Come on, why do you have to be like that? Don't be too hard on yourself. You can feel everything just fine and there's no such thing as an annoying situation like this."
“You might say that easily. But the truth is it's hard for me. I'll bet you're saying all of this just to make fun of me?”
“What are you talking about? Of course not like that. I'm just saying a few words that really fit the situation you're currently facing. God, stop saying such nonsense. How about you go with me to the party tonight?”
"Party?"
"Yes. Party. You can have fun and forget all the noise. How?"
"I don't think that's such a bad idea. But why suddenly?"
"Because I just found out about the event. So far I'm not too close to many people and only know a few. But believe me they will not let me just like that. That's why they approached me by inviting me to their event I guess it was just to get to know each other. Maybe you'll understand what I just said."
"I know. They purposely get to know each other celebrities.”
"You are right."
In this truly dire situation, there are many reasons that make sense. In accordance with what I've done, I feel that in the end all of this is just something that is useless. I feel that those who come and those who leave make no difference at all. I also saw that in the end everyone would be alone. There are not several reasons that make sense and it actually comes to me with many reasons that are really annoying. This time I couldn't let all of this end just like that and until this moment I always hoped that all of this would end easily and it turned out to be much more difficult than all the things that had been calculated so far. When there are many reasons that come to me and many other things. I felt something strange inside of me and it turned out that none of that was any different from what I already felt. This time I got to know a lot of really troublesome things and it turned out to be true. I missed a lot of information and until this moment I also didn't know that in the end all of this was really really annoying. At that time I also did not understand and really wanted to stop all this. After several times I noticed, I felt many other strange things and it turned out that all of this was really too much. After I tried hard to return to a calm state, and it turned out that it was all useless. After several times I watched and in the end it's always like this. After I finished with class, I walked to go back to my house and this time I just remembered that there are some things that I really have to do. Even though I feel lazy but I can't just let this go and I really feel that this will only make me end up feeling a lot of disappointment and that's what usually happens.
"You want to go?" asked Alona and then stopped me.
"Yes. I must leave immediately.”
"Hey, are you sure you're going to just leave?"
"What?"
"You shouldn't have left so soon. What are you doing?”
"Why are you holding me? This is so weird.”
"You will regret it if you miss the event with us."
"What? Why should I go with you guys?”
"You don't like it when you go with us?"
"No it's not like that, I just feel there is something I really have to do and this is really important to me."
“Ah, well if you feel it's really important. Be careful on the way."
"Yes. Of course, see you guys."
To be honest, I feel bad about rejecting them but all of that continues to bother me and there are a number of other things that I still can't believe to this day. I felt something was wrong with myself and I couldn't figure out what it was. On this trip, I kept feeling uneasy and at that moment I saw several people with looks that felt familiar. That person looks like I've seen it before and maybe it's just my imagination. When I look at that person, I can never see wrong. Now I can just walk away and ignore it.
'What is this?' muttered to myself.