I DON'T know but I suddenly felt guilty because of what I said to Zandy the other day. I still can't get out of my mind the conscience and the look of disappointment on his face that day. I also felt as if he was avoiding me. He doesn't even look at me or talk to me. I also feel that I am now the one to blame for him and that I should apologize even though I try to think that he is the one to blame for me.
Beverly is also messing with my mind. I want to ask Zandy about this but I don't feel like I'm in the right place to ask.
From the door of my room, I saw Zandy on the terrace facing his laptop while drinking coffee. He's been busy with whatever he's doing for days. I snorted. Someone whispers to me to approach him but I stop myself.
I took a breath and decided to go down. Since it's still early and I don't have school because it's a holiday, I thought of going out of the house to visit the plants outside. The sun is so beautiful. I started watering the plants. Even so, I smile at the beautiful flowers that grow together with the beautiful weather.
From where I was, I looked at Zandy who was still busy typing on his laptop. Several times I wanted to approach him and talk to him but I just chose not to. Maybe everything will get even more messed up.
"Miles."
I frowned and turned to the man who called me. I was a little surprised to see Ton. I remembered what I was thinking about him and Zandy and now I doubt what I thought. It turns out that Zandy is not gay and I was just wrong about what I saw but now I know what he is.
"Oh! Ton, what are you doing here?" I turned off the water on the hose and went to the gate to open it.
"Is your husband here? I mean, Zandy? I have something to tell him," he said while smiling at me. He was holding an envelope. He also seemed embarrassed by what was said. Because he knows the real relationship between me and Zandy.
I turned to the terrace. "He's busy typing on his laptop," I said and then turned to him again. "Come in, Ton and just go see Zandy on the terrace," I invited him.
Ton smiled. "Sorry for the trouble, Miles. Thank you," he said, then went inside.
I just smiled before Ton finally entered. I just looked at him and continued watering the plant. After I watered, I went inside and that's when I started cleaning.
I sat on the sofa after I cleaned the living room. I was tired because of its size and I could feel the sweat on my forehead. I rubbed it. It's been a while but Zandy and Ton are still up there and still haven't come down.
Can I bring them a snack? I don't know but I thought about it and I want to do it. I stood up from my seat and went to the kitchen. At least I know how to make a sandwich.
I started preparing the ingredients for the ham sandwich I was going to make. It's good and there's bread there. There is also ham and vegetables. I have also made a cold juice that is perfect for hot weather.
Am I doing it right? I'm nervous about Zandy's reaction to me doing this. I sighed before carrying the tray containing Zandy and Ton's food and drinks.
I closed my eyes for a moment and let out a breath before going up the stairs. I saw the two talking while the photos and layouts were on the table and I couldn't understand what they were for.
"I prepared sandwiches and juice for you two."
The two men looked up at me but my focus was on Zandy and her reaction. His face was serious but there was a hint of surprise.
"Ow! You made this for us, Miles, we'll finish anyway, but thank you," Ton said shyly while smiling.
"No, it's ok, Ton, I noticed that you are too busy and you might be hungry, so I prepared a snack for you," I answered and smiled even though I was nervous about Zandy's looks.
"Thank you," said Zandy seriously. He took the tray I was holding. Our skins touched which gave me what felt like electricity and burning.
"We're almost done, Miles. We're just planning the design of the restaurant that Zandy's wanted to open by the end of the year," said Ton.
Restaurant? So, that's why Zandy has been busy these past few days because he planned for the restaurant they will build. I felt happy for him because he was still pursuing what he wanted to do.
"You prepared this sandwich or you just ordered it outside?" Zandy asked while looking at the sandwich on the plate.
"I made it with my own hands, Zandy. I also know how to make other food. I may not be good at cooking but still, I can make sandwiches," I said.
"Fried potato, tomato, and ripe mango?" asked Zandy.
"Yeah! I used to prepare such sandwiches since when I was in high school," I said.
"Wow! It looks delicious," Ton complimented and took a sandwich and ate it straight away. He closed his eyes and savored it. "You made it well, Miles. The sandwich is delicious, the tomatoes, fried potato, and the mango blend well and create such a taste that leaves the taste buds," he added as if he were a food reviewer.
"Thank you for the compliments, Ton," I said happily. I turned to Zandy, who was already holding the sandwich and looking at it. I'm nervous and tense I don't know why. It's like I'm on a cooking show and I have to impress Zandy.
I held my breath when I saw Zandy take a bite of the sandwich and chew it. He ate very elegantly and every time he chewed, I could see the detail of his lips. Suddenly my mind came back to our wedding kiss and his soft lips that I felt.
"You look tense, Miles. Are you scared that Zandy might not like your sandwich?" Ton asked. "I'll tell you this, when you prepare food for him, you should be really scared. His ability to taste the food is different. It's hard to satisfy his taste," Ton added with a laugh.
I blinked and bowed slightly. I felt my cheeks flush. I should have left before them.
"Let's go back to what we're talking about, Ton," Zandy turned to the person in front of him and put down the sandwich he had just taken a bite of. Didn't he like it? I felt frustrated and sad.
"Thank you again, Miles, for the snack. Don't be sad, I liked what you prepared," said Ton who might have noticed my disappointment. I just smiled at Ton. He also faced Zandy. "So, all the requirements we need, we already have, and also the design and name of the restaurant. The next thing we need to do is to visit the place on our list."
I snorted. I turned to Zandy again before turning around and going down to the living room. I feel weak. I don't know but I felt sad. I just wanted to be in a good mood but Zandy didn't seem to like that.
I stayed in the living room. It was more than an hour before Ton came down. He even told me that he was going home. He also thanked me.
When Ton left, I also decided to go upstairs to take a shower in my room. When I got upstairs, I saw Zandy heading to his room. Our eyes met for a moment but he immediately avoided it. We met and he passed me. Is he really mad at me?
I grabbed the doorknob of my door and turned it. Just as I was about to open it, I was stopped by what Zandy said.
"I like your sandwich, Miles. Thank you."