When I looked back at the person, I saw no one. At that moment I thought that maybe what I saw was just an illusion. I looked back at my friends and went back to doing this group assignment. They continue to argue and there is one other person who also has a strong opinion. I felt that this would only lead to war and when I looked again it turned out that my guess was not wrong. At that time, I became more and more convinced that all of this would only end in endless bickering. I can't stop thinking about them. I also don't really understand why these people are always such a bother. After we managed to come up with an idea and that's when we calmed down to work again. I couldn't take it anymore and not long after that I really felt dizzy. When I came back, it turned out that they had started to disperse and there was only one person waiting for me. I could already guess that in the end they were always like this. It was then that I approached this person and then saw what this person was working on. Turns out I can only be silent. His eyes were quite serious when working on his writing and I had time to pay attention to him for a while. This person was really different compared to the others. I also wondered why I wasn't bothered by the noise caused by the others when I was hanging out together. The eyes that showed that everything was nothing, I also felt surprised for the umpteenth time and I also sometimes felt curious when this person opened his mouth. Strangely, this person never made a sound and I was also worried about his condition which might not be well. I sat right in front of this person and it wasn't long before I started talking to him despite the awkwardness between us. I can only start the conversation.
"Wow you do group assignments while doing other tasks?" I asked.
"Yes."
"Great. Though it is very difficult. How can you do it?”
"I'm just doing what I usually do. Why?"
"It is nothing. I feel you have worked hard. Do n't you want to go home? The others have gone home."
“Still not finished. If you want to go home that's fine, I can do it myself."
"No. I'll stay here until you finish your job."
"You don't have to be like that."
"It doesn't matter. I also don't want to go home. I feel so bored at home. So I want to be late.”
"So it seems."
"Yes. that's how it is .”
"You're not hiding something?"
"What?"
"Ah, apparently not huh."
Instantly the words sounded unpleasant to my ears. I was shocked when I heard it and then fell silent. I think there are a number of things today that really make me very curious about something. I felt uncomfortable in an instant as if I had just been stabbed by a sword and it was very painful. My heart was still beating and my breath was heavy. I started trying to calm down and then checked my phone. This feeling is really torturous. I saw several posts on social media and found that they only contained selfies of people in class. It didn't take long for me to put my phone back in my bag .
'How annoying,' I muttered to myself.
I've been annoyed with them for a long time. Sometimes the feeling comes very quickly and then engulfs my consciousness. This time I tried myself not to be affected and it was very difficult. At the same time , I also repeatedly felt this and at the same time there were several things that were blocking my mind. It feels like I'm playing myself and there's no end. I was also shocked and it turned out that all that was indeed done until I felt a terrible sensation. I also held my head again and felt quite dizzy. Not long after that, I also saw a note on my desk. While walking to pick it up, I'm currently curious about a few things. What auntie said and there were also other things that really made me feel a strange sensation. I feel like I have to suspect someone over and over again. This time I tried to control myself and in the end it was all in vain. I also couldn't stop thinking about it and it didn't feel good. This note contains text that I do not understand. I had a hard time reading it because the writing was somewhat confusing. In the end I put it back on the table and then played with my phone. I came across these noisy people's posts and all I saw were pictures of themselves. Even though I felt guilty for a while because of their actions, I also came back to think that it felt when I came home from school like someone was watching over me. Curiosity about it reappeared and this time even brought me into some troublesome puzzles. I kept thinking that maybe someone was following me or maybe it was just my feeling. Thinking back it was impossible it was just my feeling. Most likely it is a fact. But I don't see anyone else following me either. I'm getting more and more confused by this and so far I haven't found anything.
“Ah, damn it,” I muttered under my breath.
That day, when someone had witnessed some quite absurd incident. I, who was still small, felt the same way and at that moment could only be silent. Someone took my hand and then took me along with him. I can only see that fact from a distance and no one tells me everything. Time is ticking even faster than it should. That feeling always appears in my heart. Questions filled my head and I again couldn't do anything and I couldn't even ask anyone at that time. It just feels so wrong and that's how I feel. Even though that incident that made everyone feel scared appeared in front of everyone, I don't understand it at all . The me who was still in the past was really powerless. After I sighed again and then looked around, it felt like I was just starting to come back with the deepest desire to know some things that I had never known before. I kept feeling that curiosity and even almost killed myself. When I endured it, I was really tormented and this ambition filled my mind this time along with several other things. I haven't been like this in a long time.
"What else can I do?" muttered to myself.
Several times I often feel this way and continue like this. Actually I'm tired of all this and I can only keep breathing. At the same time I feel that this must continue to repeat itself like a food chain cycle. At that time I also did not understand with all this. I feel that I will eventually be defeated by this curiosity. Can't believe it's already night now. I just lay there all day after coming home from school. At that moment, I heard the voice of my aunt who seemed to be talking to someone in the living room. I don't want to see it. I thought that if I joined them, it would seem that I alone would not understand the discussion of their conversation. I decided to just stay in my room because it feels peaceful. Different from before. I also caught a glimpse of the person who was with the aunt and that person was like a private doctor. Not wanting to assume anything strange, I buried my thoughts and returned to my room as relaxed as usual. I didn't say anything at dinner either. Hearing the grandmother who kept talking almost made me not want to say anything and it turned out that it lasted a long time. I've given up on the words that came out of grandma's mouth because it continues like that. When I got back to my room I heard my phone ring and when I looked it was an incoming call.
"Hello?"
"Hey, where have you been?"
"What?"
"You haven't been to the library lately. Don't you like reading anymore?"
"Ah, actually I'm just busy with school work. Maybe next time I will come there again. By the way Miss Jasmine, I guess I have a few things I want to ask you.”
"What's that? just say . You can ask whenever you want."
“I feel curious about something impossible.”
"Hah? what are you talking about ?"
“That's how it is. I think we should just meet up."
It's true, that some things can't be understood by other people. I had already suspected that this whole thing was complicated and there was no point in going that deep into it. But, I still want to know more. Feelings of doubt arise again. I already suspected that in fact I really couldn't go any further to get what made me feel curious. This time the disappointment was inevitable. I've come to this. At that time, I also felt that someone was watching me but who was that person and where was that person until now there was no answer.