Chapter 4

Irina's words really made me feel that there might be more to me than me. It's just, I feel that it's just to amuse me. After we talked to each other, I knew right away that there was actually something wrong with today. When some other people decided to look for the whereabouts of the dance club president, I was the only one who felt that it was just a waste because that person might not even be in this school. Since then, too, I've felt something is wrong with all this. A situation that felt like being in the middle of someone's threat and this was even more obvious. Behind all that, I feel that someone is currently eavesdropping on our conversation. At that time I also tried to prove my hunch, and it was true. I saw a female student watching the two of us and when I looked at that person, apparently that person immediately realized and just walked away. I had thought that this would definitely happen and it was true. At the same time , I've started to feel sick when someone is always like that. Not long after, I returned to listen to what Irina had to say about my work of art. Many students also asked questions that were not much different from before about the painting I made. They seem to think that my painting has two meanings. Actually it can be interpreted according to what is in the mind of the person who saw it or just what it means from my thoughts. They became more and more curious about all my work and kept asking why not show it all off. I started to think that if I took part in some painting competitions and exhibited my work, I would feel a little insecure if I could. All of that continues to haunt me and even now. It's been a long time since I've made another work and this is the last time I've done it.
“Ah, actually I'm a bit concerned about that. maybe one day I can do it,” I said to one of the students who kept asking.
“Is that so? OK, I'll be waiting."
"What?"
"That's enough. I think it's time for you to show your all and shine brightly,” said Irina. The student immediately left.
"I guess I still can't."
"Why?"
"I feel like I haven't."
"So we have to wait until you're ready? I guess it's just going to take too much time. You better prepare yourself and forget what 's bad in your mind. You 'll never be able to if you continue like that Anne."
"I think what you said is true."
"Of course. After graduating from this school, you can become an artist. I believe it."
"Is it true?"
“You still doubt yourself huh. God, you are so stubborn."
"Oh yes, one other important thing you have to keep working."
"I will do it."
"Good. Your talent is extraordinary. You have to make use of it not to lose it all. Even though there are some people who most likely don't like you, it's best if you don't mind them. You just have to focus on yourself. Not other people."
"Thanks for the advice, I feel much better now."
"Yes. Of course. By the way, why are those outside so noisy?”
"They're looking for the dance club president."
Irina who heard what I said, Irina immediately fell silent. After that I saw the expression on Irina's face which showed that it seemed this person was also surprised by the news that had been spread. I feel that this is like a game of hide and seek. One is missing and the other has to find him. They may already feel tired from continuing to search for that person's whereabouts. It's just that I feel that all this is pointless and just takes up too much time. Time just wasted and the person we were looking for was never found. It is very painful to see the reality that is like that. I intend to return to the classroom. After saying goodbye to Irina, I went straight to the classroom. As I walked towards the second floor, not long after that I ran into two female students who seemed to be discussing something. I heard it wasn't very clear and after that I felt curious again. This situation is no longer safe. I saw the others continue to feel fear as if they thought this was terror. Arriving at the classroom, I saw that there were several people who were enjoying themselves and they didn't seem to care about this situation. I also immediately sat down in my place and then played the phone just like they did.
“Anne!” someone said.
"What?"
“Ah, damn it. You are here it seems. I was looking for you though."
"Why are you looking for me? What do you want?"
"Hah? There's nothing I want. I just need to talk to you for a minute."
“Speak. I will listen to the end.”
"It's about the painting you made."
"What's wrong with my painting?"
“To be honest there is someone who wants to buy that work of yours. But are you willing or not to sell it?”
"What are you saying?" I said standing up because I was surprised.
“Ah, I mean I won't force you. Really."
"Who wants to buy my work?"
“Eh?”
“You said someone wanted to buy it. So tell me who?"
"That person doesn't attend this school."
"What? then how do you know about my painting?”
“Because I posted it. Your work is really beautiful so I share it on my social media status.
"I see. So that person saw your status and then wanted to buy it?”
"Correct. take a look . This person keeps calling me," said Gracia while showing the message that came in on her cell phone.
"Good grief. I still can't believe it. How could anyone want to buy that.”
"Hah? what are you talking about? It's clear that your work is excellent. That's why there are people who feel interested in buying it.”
"I'll think again."
"Hey, you can't be like that. That person really wants your work. Why are you telling people to keep waiting?”
"You are right. fine then. It's a shame."
"Okay. I will tell that person.”
Even now, I still can't believe it. Even though I felt a bit confused, I should have looked at all the facts and accepted them. Many people turned out to be quite interested and that actually made me feel an extraordinary burden. I'm like a human who just got hit by a rock. I can't say anymore that it's obviously very heavy. I had no other choice but to say yes and that was the only thing that could help me. After I talked to Gracia, I couldn't calm down anymore and maybe the person who contacted Gracia could be my customer. My mind has now started to vacillate and apparently it lasted quite a long time. I returned to the exhibition room and when the festival time was over, at that time I paid a little more attention to my work and when I looked again it was indeed quite impressive. This is the first time I admire my work in my life. After that, I took off my painting and then took it to the classroom before going home. At that moment I saw the view of the class which was already crowded and they seemed to be getting ready to go home.
"Ah, it's time to go home apparently," I muttered.
Not long after that we returned to our homes. I am already in front of the door of the house, as soon as I open the door it feels like I am back to the peace that is usually my daily meal. At this moment I also saw the grandmother who was still relaxing while reading a magazine. The scenery is quite not too much to my liking. I often don't talk to grandma because I really don't have anything to talk about. As soon as she saw me now, grandma's gaze seemed to show me that I had to speak for a while. Even though I'm tired, I still have to try not to become a big problem. Grandmother then put down the magazine and immediately said something.
"What's that?"
Ah, this is my painting. I brought it from school because someone wanted to buy this. that's why I brought it.”
"You don't immediately give it to people who want to buy your work?"
"Yes. Because that person was not at home so that person asked me to come on Sunday and arrange this.”
"I see. You've grown even more now."
“Eh?”
"Continue."
"What?"
“That talent of yours could come in handy. You just need to use it well and it can help you in the future. Do you understand what I'm saying?"
“Of course I understand. Thank you grandmother."
"No need to thank. That was your talent from the start.”
To be honest, I was surprised by what grandma said. I felt that in the end grandma would acknowledge me. Before, I had never gotten this kind of compliment before and all I received was a very different view. This time I will not run again and will never deny my talent again. I've been determined to do my best and I have to prove it. My mind had calmed down and at that moment I immediately returned to my room. Meanwhile, in a different place, a girl was seen reading one of Grace's messages and soon the girl smiled as if she was very happy.

Book Comment (112)

  • avatar

    very good

    14d

      0
  • avatar
    AzamFakhrul

    your writing is good

    20/09

      0
  • avatar
    Nini

    love it

    20/09

      0
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