Upon seeing the smile on the girl's face, I felt a happy sensation. Apparently the person who bought my work was a cute girl . When we started talking about this work, that person immediately felt happy and seemed very satisfied with the work I had made. I was happy too when I saw the expression on his face that showed a happy smile. Less than an hour later, I had decided to return home. The girl escorted me to the front gate and not long after that waved at me. I left right away. On the way back, right now I still can't believe what I did just now. This is the first time I sell my work to other people and it turns out that people like my work. It was really unexpected. I'm determined to get back to work again. Arriving home, I saw one of the paintings I made yesterday. Right now I'm paying closer attention and it turns out that if you look closely, this shows everything. The meaning contained in it also reaches the connoisseurs of the painting. This time I intend to make another work. I have also thought this far to develop my potential even more. At the same time , I had time to read some notes shared by other people in special forums. They did it on purpose just to give information to other artists including myself. As soon as I read it, in my heart I felt both happy and relieved because this is indeed a perfect thing. I have used many references to make my work and there are only a few shortcomings that I must immediately complete. Maybe ordinary people will never see that, but some people who really understand art will never ignore even one point of mistake made by an artist. They will immediately dislike it and may never see the artist's work again. I've been well informed on that and now I just need to do well. My hands move as usual by skillfully playing the brush. I've been thinking about what to do next and now I want to make something out of the ordinary. So far, I 'm going for it despite the fact that all of this may or may not work. Grandmother had hoped for me and I couldn't ignore it. In the end my work is not much different from my imagination. I painted it how I wanted and now it's almost done. When I was busy painting, not long after that my aunt knocked on the door of this room and then entered.
“Wow. Have you started again? This is awesome.”
"Come on. It hasn't even happened yet.”
"Not yet so you've done well. The color is gorgeous just like your style.”
"Oh yeah, have you never painted with realism?"
"No. For me it does not suit. I just use the flow of naturalism only."
"Why? Is it just because it doesn't fit?"
"Not only that. Actually when I was at school I tried to use other streams and in the end they all failed. I guess I'm just not cut out for that flow."
"I see. Are there any friends of Auntie who feel rivaled?”
"Hah? Ah, I don't remember. But as far as I remember there was only one person and that was also at the college."
"So it doesn't rule out yes."
“Does anyone hate your work?”
"Who knows. I also do not know."
"If someone hates you?"
"That doesn't know either."
"Then why did you ask me that? I thought you were also in that position.”
“That's because I have to be on my guard. Isn't there nothing impossible in this world including human behavior?
"You are right. Yes , it's good that you'll be wary of other people. just don't make it too obvious."
"Why?"
"You will fail."
"I understand."
"When you're done, are you going to sell this one too?"
"If anyone is going to buy, I guess so."
Even though I'm a bit curious about the humans out there , I also can't deny it for sure. I'm just curious and I can use that as a reference to avoid problems. From what my aunt said, I think I already know that it's not as easy as imagined. Even though many people may admire me, it feels ridiculous to have the same ones . I feel it's like imagination. Unreal thing. However, the longer I also had time to feel a little pressure that made me not excited. Even that was as bad as what I experienced before in the past. When I looked back at my current work, I was almost satisfied too. But strangely the feeling of emptiness came instead. At times like this I can only sigh before finally continuing to paint. My aunt is still watching me paint and there seems to be something that makes her feel attracted when I apply red. At that time, I saw clearly that my aunt seemed to be seeing this for the first time. I'm getting amazed by this person. Even though this is nothing compared to his works which always appear in grandma's gallery. Sometimes I also feel jealous of the achievements that my aunt has achieved so far.
“The color is great. You mix it up so well that other people who see this painting will definitely be amazed.”
"Okay, don't overdo it. I think it's just a normal color.”
"You still deny it huh. even though I said you have to be confident and explain everything. That way other people will also be interested in seeing all of your work. If you lower yourself like that, they will only look down on you.”
"What? it's too cruel.”
"Reality is indeed cruel."
"Yes. I understand. Next time I will not be humble anymore and will be confident.”
"Yes. That's what you should do. What about previous works? Did that person like the work?”
"Yes. That person really liked the piece.”
At that time I just hoped that that person would not destroy me. I've always been narrow minded and it all turned out to be wrong. When I think back on it, I'm always happy and now that's the reason why I have to keep painting. I feel alive and now I've proven it again. Finally finished. Auntie who saw this painting did not stop commenting that this is very good. I also feel relieved. When I looked at it too, it felt very deep. The meaning I create for this painting will not easily be understood by others. Only certain people will understand it.
"It's done," I muttered to myself.
The next day. Today I went back to school as usual. When I saw people already in the classroom, I saw Yuko who had also recovered from illness. I quickly approached the person. When Yuko saw me, she immediately told me everything. A few weeks ago Yuko fell ill and had to be hospitalized. Yuko's parents informed the school about this. After several weeks, I finally met Yuko again and to be honest I was very happy to see Yuko healthy as usual. It wasn't long before class started. All students attended the class well. Until finally break time arrived. Instantly I felt a different sensation than usual. The people who looked calm and that even made me feel surprised. Usually they were just loud all the time and now it didn't feel like that. I immediately got up from my seat and walked out of the classroom. At the same time , I also saw several people busy practicing sports. Apart from that, I wanted to talk to Yuko again but some of my other friends still kept crowding Yuko. I had to wait for them to leave and apparently not long after that Yuko came up to me and asked me a few things.
"Anne."
"Yuko."
“I hear you managed to sell your art? Is it true?"
“Ah, that's right. but how do you know?”
"I heard about it from other friends. they also talk about your wonderful work.”
“Ah, so it's like that. I honestly didn't expect it to sell either."
"Really?"
"Yes. I don't think the results are as good as others think."
"You feel too inferior. Do not like that. you have to believe in your abilities. you understand!”
"Yes. I understand."
"It's good that you've grown a lot Anne."
“But, are you feeling much better? You're getting enough rest, right ?"
"Yes. I've recovered. Of course I'm well rested."
I could see from the expression on her face that showed the truth. At this time I was also feeling unwell. But I'm trying to stay afloat. Even if it's like that, I don't think there will be any other choice if you just keep losing, it will become an even bigger problem. Yuko is definitely aware of it. Currently we are still talking and joking before finally going to the canteen for lunch. When we got there, there were already a lot of people waiting in line and patiently we finally started having lunch. After that, actually I also want to ask about his illness. It's just the timing wasn't right.
'No. I guess I should save that question first,' I thought.