As soon as I got out of the taxi, I sought out Allerick and Blythe. As I was searching for them, I thought about calling Mama and Kuya Samuel, but their phones were out of service. A familiar voice from the backyard cried out the name of Allerick. I knew it was Blythe. There I saw Allerick laying down with Blythe standing in front of him, her clothing stained with blood and sobbing.
I drew nearer to them. When I saw the blood on the road, a deep sensation of terror washed over them, a short paralysis. "Allerick!" I yelled.
"Ate, ate!" Blythe cried out in distress.
I grabbed Allerick’s backpack as he was lying on the ground, looking for something I could wrap around his head before picking him up. "Get a cab!"
"Ate..."
"Blythe, take a cab!" I said as I shoved Blythe away.
Blythe wept with a loud voice as she rushed away from us, and when she returned, she was already in the cab. Allerick was carried by the driver. Blythe couldn’t stop weeping and refused to let go of Allerick’s hand until we arrived at the hospital.
Allerick was loaded onto a stretcher and sent to the emergency room. "Ate... What will happen to him?" Blythe gripped my palm hard, her hand quivering. She witnessed what had occurred and was terrified. "He’s not going to die, is he?"
I stroked her cheek to soothe her down. "No, Allerick will be OK, Blythe; nothing horrible will happen to him; he will not die."
"It’s all my fault! It’s all my fault. What if anything awful happens to him?" Her unending sobs flowed forth even more.
I embraced her while crying since Blythe was blaming herself for the act for which I was truly responsible. "No, Blythe, none of this is your fault; Ate is the one to blame."
Blythe calmed down and stopped weeping, but she continued to blame herself. Once Gabriel and Mishelley arrived at the hospital, I felt a bit better. "What happened?" Gabriel queried. The apparent horror in their expressions was obvious.
Tears welled up in my eyes, but I pretended to be brave. "A car hit Allerick," I explained.
Gabriel and Mishelley stroked my hair, while tears coursed down my face as well. "Shh, Gemma, please calm yourself; Allerick will be OK," Gabriel urged, but no matter how many times they told me that Allerick would be OK, I couldn’t relax until I saw it with my own eyes.
"Have you reached out to Aunt yet?" Mishelley asked.
I nodded. "I try, but she doesn’t respond."
"How about this, Mishelley will accompany you while I send Blythe to my place, where Mom can keep an eye on her for a time," Gabriel proposed.
Mishelley gave a nod of approval.
"No, I don’t want to go anywhere," Blythe said as soon as she learned of Gabriel’s plan.
I knelt a little to get to her. "Blythe, you need to nap; I don’t want you to see all of this, so please, I'm begging you, go to Gabriel’s house," I urged.
Blythe then failed to suppress another sob. "No, please ate! I want to know if he’s okay... I promised Allerick I'd be there when he woke up." She wiped her tears with her palm.
I didn’t make Blythe go until she fell asleep on my leg while waiting. I felt bad for my sister since I knew she was still blaming herself and didn’t want to return home.
"Gemma!"
I took a peek at Gabriel. "They’ve arrived," he said, pointing to mama and Kuya Samuel. I took Blythe’s back off my leg to approach them, but mama rushed directly to the emergency room, which Kuya Samuel prevented her from doing.
"Why? Why is my baby in there? What happened?" Mama couldn’t stop herself from panicking.
"I’m sorry, mama. I- I didn’t arrive on time. It’s my fault. I got careless. I’m sorry... " I lowered my head towards my mother, tears rolling down my cheeks.
"Why? Why did this happen, Gemma?" Mama inquired, her eyes filled with rage as if she was accusing me.
"M- mama,"
Mama slapped me across the cheek with her palm. "You're always thinking about yourself. You let this happen! You let them alone, and because of what you did, I will even lose a child!" Mama said as she pointed her hands at me.
"Mama," Kuya Samuel restrained her by clutching her shoulder.
"It’s just a simple thing, Gemma, I asked you to do a simple thing, but you didn’t do it!" Mama kept pointing at me, "If something terrible happens to your brother, I will never forgive you."
"Don’t say that, Mama..."
The sorrow I feel multiplies the minute Mama says those words. I expected Mama to say that, but I wasn’t expecting the anguish, the ache that appeared to be steadily crushing me.
Tears spilled in mama’s eyes, and her condition deteriorated further, Kuya Samuel forced her to sit on the bench next to Blythe. Gabriel and Mishelley initially took me away to calm Mama down. Everything mama said to me stings, but I’ll accept it because it’s my fault, and it’s my responsibility that this is happening to us.
My knee gave up on purpose because it was in excruciating agony. I sat on the floor, unable to stop sobbing in front of the crowd, though it seemed idiotic. I used my two hands to hide my face. As my tears spilled, I felt their embrace.
"Gemma..." They just could not hold back tears of sympathy for me.
"I’m useless," I sniffed. "I save other people than my brother, and I'm... a useless piece of shit..."
"Don’t say that, Gemma. Mishelley and I both know you don’t want this to happen," Gabriel replied, stroking my back.
I felt pain in my eyes after that heavy sobbing, and I couldn’t see due to the swelling in my eyes. The two did not abandon me; instead, they accompanied me. Mama was standing outside of the emergency room while Kuya Samuel brought Blythe home. Neither my elder brother Samuel, nor I can force her to go home. She’s too worried.
"Auntie, eat first," Mishelley said as she handed Mama a slice of sandwich.
Mama yanked Mishelley’s hand away from where she was holding the sandwich, refusing to eat it.
"But, Tita..."
"Do you think I can eat like this?" Mama said a bit more loudly. I’m concerned about her; even though I want to approach her, I can’t because I don’t want her to become more stressed.
"Are you Allerick Mendoza’s mother?" the doctor asked, holding gloves that appeared to have recently been removed.
We all rose to our feet. "Yes," Mama said, nodding. "D- doctor, how is my son? Will he be all right?"
The doctor gives us a disheartened expression. "I’m sorry to inform you that your son is currently in serious condition."
I was on the verge of collapsing. "What do you mean, doctor?" I asked.
"Due to the traumatic injury that he received in the accident, we identified a pool of blood trapped outside his blood vessel. Your son had a subdural hematoma. Unlike mild hematomas, which may heal in about five days, large hematomas, which is the case, can last weeks to months, but subdural hematomas can cause a slow loss of consciousness and carry a high risk of death," the doctor explained.
"D-death?" Mama nearly fell to the floor once the doctor informed her of Allerick’s condition, but Gabriel grabbed him.
"We can do surgery on your son, a procedure called a craniotomy, to remove the large subdural hematoma, but I have to warn you, this is highly dangerous. He might die, and even if he survives, his brain will not function normally. Only 20 to 30 percent of individuals can expect to see a full or almost full recovery of brain functioning."
"W- what's possible? Even after the procedure, there's no guarantee he'll survive?" I inquired, perplexed by the doctor's explanations.
The doctor nodded. "Unfortunately, yes."
My entire body began to quiver as if I were about to pass out. Even if he is in surgery, there is a chance that his brain will not work correctly. "Look what you've done! You ruined Allerick, and he could even die as a result of your actions!" She then slapped me, which I accepted and did not resist. "You're worthless!"
"Tita, please!" Mishelley grasped my mother’s hand as Gabriel stepped in between us.
"You’re selfish!" Tears of anger and shame burned Mama’s eyes as she continued to smack her hands against me.
They both helped Mama to sit down. "Drink this," Gabriel said as he handed Mama some water. "Tita, relax."
I hurried out of the hospital as my tears continued to fall. I’m usually like this; I flee anytime I’m in pain or embarrassed.
"You're always thinking about yourself. You let this happen! You let them alone, and because of what you did, I will even lose a kid!"
"It’s just a simple thing, Gemma. I asked you to do a simple thing, but you didn’t do it!"
"If something terrible happens to your brother, I will never forgive you."
Why? How come this is happening to us? Why is it that horrible things constantly happen to my family? What sin did we commit? You have presented us with a tricky problem that was hard to solve. You’ve already taken everything from us, so if you’re going to take Allerick from us, it’s as if you killed us, too.