I left my favorite spot and decided to go back to our classroom. I glanced at my wristwatch while heading there. Ten minutes left and it's already lunch break. Should I go back to the room or just wander around?
Where's Rocelia now?
I stopped and unconsciously bit the bottom of my lip when I realized I left her in the gymnasium. I can still picture out her worrief face. I wonder she goes.
I stepped upstairs.
"Waaah! Van, I'm so sorry! Sorry I didn't even defend you! Sorry!" A familiar high-pitched voice echoed and the last person I'm looking for have appeared in front of me.
"H-hey---" she jumped and hugged me tightly. I stilled.
She caressed my back."I know you're so hurt right now. I'm sorry for being weak enough, I can't even do something for you to feel light... If I could only ease the heaviness on your chest..." that made me blink twice.
I pulled back my senses and hugged her back, at the end.
I ducked my face on her shoulder."It's okay... I'm okay. It's nothing, I'm already used to receive those kind of lines." I responded weakly.
"Van... you're being tough enough," my grip on his uniform, tightened."Stop pretending when you're with me, will you?" She moved away to face me."Because it won't work, I know if you're lying or not. Believe it or not, I always observe you even before when we're not still this close and you're not yet letting me enter your life."
"Yeah, I believe that. I always notice your stares at me, in my peripheral vision." I highlighted. She pouted.
"I thought you don't care about my existence at all!" She slightly hit my shoulder.
I chuckled silently."Your thought was right, though. I don't really care about anyone. I prefer socializing with the wind than socialize with people who doesn't have good sense of humor." I shrugged.
Her lips stretched a wide smile. Oh, I know that look. My lips twitched a bit. She probably thinking silly again.
"So I have a good sense of humor? You're socializing with me now, you know." She wiggled her eyebrows.
Seriously?
I just rolled my eyes at her and was planning to walk out first when she held my shoulder. And her next words melted my heart unexpectedly.
"I understand if you chose to be alone after what happened, it's for your own peace and I know you wanted to control yourself, too. You don't want to cause trouble in the middle of the practice. You acted bravely, you're stronger because you're able to control your anger. Not all people can do that. I'm so proud of your progress, my friend."
I turned to her and nodded slowly. My face doesn't showing any emotion but my eyes does."Thank you for understanding me, and I'm... I'm sorry for leaving you earlier. I just don't want to divert all of my anger to you." As time passed by, her actions and words bringing me doubts no more.
She's true, pure and genuine. I'm ashamed whenever I remember the days I doubted and mistreated her when all she did is to be good for me. She proved that her intentions were crystal clear... despite my failed attempts of having what they called 'friends', I know she's different from them and she proved me right. She proved enough.
Rocelia's face softened. She stepped closer and cupped my face."I'm right about my deduction before. You're not really that bad girl which people always sees you. You're one of a kind rather!" My face crumpled when she pinched my cheeks.
"Stop it!" I removed her hands off me. She laughed hard at my reaction.
I was glaring at her laughing face. My most hated gesture is that one! I hate it when someone's pinching my cheeks, poking my side and anything related to my body!
But since she's Rocelia, I can't do something about it anymore.
"Don't call me one of a kind. I'm not like that, definitely not so me. That weak trait is already forgotten." I finalized.
Her happy smile faded."I may not know the history why you turned yourself into a villain everyone hates... I'm sure there's still chance for you to look at the bright and good side and strive for the better version of yourself..."
I just shrugged and walked out first. I heard her sighed but in the end, she has no choice but to follow me. We entered the classroom and we're welcomed by our noisy classmates, messed up armchairs and crumpled papers allover the floor. I looked at Rocelia, wondering. She said our president isn't here that's why they're like that since the last subject ended and even she's the vice president, they're not listening to her.
I sighed. I really hate public schools.
"Goodbye, Van! See you tomorrow!" Rocelia was waving her hands at me and suddenly, she winked.
I exaggeratedly rolled my eyes."Whatever, Lia. I'm still hesitating!" Her brow just arrowed.
"Don't be! I got you!"
I took a deep breath before going inside the limousine. I closed my eyes as I rested my back at the backrest. I started to overthink. Like what will happen tomorrow if I attend the practice again?
I'm done with that P.I.O bitch and I don't think I can still control myself if she start me again.
And then, Yukenzo's image flashed in my mind. With his disheveled hair blown by the wind, his chinky eyes, pointed nose and well-sculpted side of his face.
What the heck?
I automatically opened my eyes and held both of my arms. I'm having goosebumps! Why him? Why am I thinking that annoying guy? This is insane!
Probably my mind just reminding me that I should hate him everyday. Yeah, better that way.
Smile crept on my lips when I entered our mansion and realized Dad's not yet here including the Consuelos. I hurriedly went upstairs and changed my clothes before I go back to the first floor and walked towards the kitchen. I sneaked desserts and snacks, drinks from the refrigerator and cans. Good thing Anya and other maids were busy outside, cleaning the backyard and the garden.
I ran upstairs with bunch of foods with me. I locked the door of my room and put all of the foods to my own refrigerator and cabinet. I took the corn chips and teared it, I laid on my bed recklessly and took a bite.
I'm thinking... can I just lock myself forever inside this room?
I'm feeling contented until I fell asleep. I woke up at late midnight. I just took my midnight snack and watched movies before I covered myself with the comforter and let the realm of sleep pulled me. My every days went well. Practice everywhere, bond with Rocelia and visit the brotherhood. It was lighter for me that those past days.
And today is the day. The intramural fest. I trust Rocelia, when she said she got me, I know she mean it. But I just can't help but to feel nervous... and uncertain. This is the first time I'm joining a contest and compete with other beauties. I can't help but doubt myself.
All dressed and ready, I walked out my room and took a very deep breath. I was about to step forward downstairs when my eyes saw Daddy and his new family down there. I went near the railings and all ears, I heard their conversations.
"Goodluck, Akira. We are proud of you. Don't feel anxious, alright? I know you can do it well." Dad tousled her hair.
Akira giggled and hugged Daddy."But I want you to be there, too! You're going to watch my performance, right, Dad?" Her eyes filled with hope.
My grip on the railing, tightened. Sharon laughed at her daughter while Dad smiled, like he's very happy to see that side of Akira.
"Before 10 am, right? Hmm," I bit my lip, my chest started to get heavy.
Oh, please. Say no to her, Dad!
But my shoulders fell because my protests weren't heard."I'll cancel my appointments so that I can come over there and watch your performance," it was terrifying...
"Yey! Thank you, Daddy! You're the bestest!" Akira jumped and hugged him happily.
"Come on, sweetie. Your make up will fade, don't move too much." Sharon spotted her daughter laughingly.
Akira faced her, with her stubborn face."But I can retouch later, mom!"
Dad and Sharon looked at each other, shaking their head with a smile on their lips.
"What a happy family," I breathed along the bitterness.
Nice. He knows I'm joining the contest today as well but seems like, he forgot about it that fast. It's always Akira. She's always the favored one, the most favorite. I feel so discarded. Where's his promise to mom that he will take care and love me the way he loves her?
Maybe he didn't truly love mother. He's a coward, and he will remain that way in my eyes.
Out of nowhere, Innov joined them but his eyes looked up here like it's automatic. He saw me looking at them!
Before he could express something through his eyes, I already looked away and stepped backward. I ran to the veranda and decided to just wait 'til they leave the place.