**** Wedding night. ****
 “ His ways are not our ways and his thoughts are not our thoughts. ”  
****
      As the ceremony slowly came to an end, Mira felt her heart racing. It didn't help much that Jose, her new husband, kept staring at her with that look, she hadn't identified yet as it was one she wasn't familiar with. 
    “ You are now husband and wife. ” the words of the priest brought her attention back to the present. She stared at her lover and couldn't deny the love and compassion she saw in his eyes.
   She could do this, couldn't she? 
For him and their love, she could overcome her fear of intimacy, couldn't she?
****
—  Joseph. —
   I felt Mira's hand froze in my warm ones as I carried her bridal styled up the stairs. “ Could she really be afraid? ” I wondered.
We've both waited for this day for so many years already and now that it's here. I couldn't help feeling nervous.
Cos, if one thing. It's going to be a turning point in our relationship.
   Slowly, I placed her on the bed and took a second to compose myself before cupping her face.
    Her eyes looked larger than usual and must I say, she looked more beautiful than I've ever seen her.  “ Do you want to do this? ” I found myself asking, despite knowing the obvious. 
    “ Hmm… ” she nodded, I could see fear and dread written all over her face. Could she possibly be this scared of intimacy?
  “ Wanna take a bath? ” I offered carefully. Seeing her eyes widen in surprise made me almost chuckle. “ Together? ”  she said as if her entire life depended on it. 
“ Do you want that? ”
“ No. I'll freshen up alone. ” And without waiting for me to reply, she ran off into the bathroom and shut the door behind her. 
****
In the bathroom.
“ God. ” she gulped. “ I can't do this. ” Her fists were tightly clenched right beside her, as warm tears spilled out of her eyes. 
“ You can, Daughter. ”
“ Don't be afraid, for I am with you. ”
“ Don't be dismayed, for I am close to you. ” 
As those words descended, she felt his presence all over the room and the peace that passes all understanding washed over her and it was truly beautiful.
“ Thank you, father. ”
Slowly, she stripped off every piece of clothing and entered the shower.
   Ten minutes later, she slipped into a simple nightgown and slowly stepped out of the bathroom.
 The sight that greeted her was that of multiple colored candles lit all over the room, she noted the difference in atmosphere which was super comforting and relaxing.
  While she was still lost in her thoughts, she felt herself being lifted off the ground, before she could let out a Yelp. She found herself on the bed with Joseph on top of her. 
   His eyes were blazing with an emotion she didn't recognize. “ Jose. ” her voice only added fuel to the already lit fire. 
     “ Mira. ” the words died down in his throat as he covered her mouth with his.
At first, she felt weird until passion consumed her and she melted. 
    She felt herself being overwhelmed by a thousand emotions, some she couldn't recognize. she was filled with euphoria until she felt the sharp pain that brought out of her dream-like state.
    “ Jose. ” she moaned as warm tears streamed down her face. “ It hurts. ”
Her words made Joseph pause, “ Shush. It's going to be okay. ” He coerced her, reducing his pace. 
Despite his assurance, the pain didn't stop, rather it became intense with each passing moment and the last thing Mira noticed before passing out was the oneness she felt with him and the beauty of the moment.
It was like a diamond in the rough.
Yet, she wasn't able to enjoy the moment as much as Joseph would have wanted her to as she passed out right before she could. 
….
 — Mira. —
The atmosphere felt different when I opened my eyes. 
  Where am I? I thought as my eyes slowly adjusted to the light.
  I tried sitting up, but a dull ache in between my legs reminded me of an important fact I'd probably missed.
“ What's going on? ” I thought again, as memories of yesterday's activities slowly invaded my mind. 
   The bits I remembered made me cringe.
  “ Does that mean I'm no longer a maiden? ” As if the thought that I was no longer pure wasn't enough. I was reminded of the fact that, My new husband didn't actually use protection. “ What if I become pregnant? How will I live my life then? ”
My thoughts were interrupted when the door opened and my New husband walked in. 
   He was holding a tray of food. I thought I saw his eyes lit up on seeing me awake.  “ You are awake, Babe. ” I'd probably heard those words so many times that have lost count, but for some reason. Hearing them now made me feel disgusted.
    I simply stared blankly at him, disregarding my racing heart as he closed the distance between us.
    The moment Joseph stepped into the room and saw his new wife looking so lost yet beautiful. He had a bad feeling. He felt that something was wrong, but he couldn't pinpoint exactly what it was. 
    He knew the intimacy will cause a change in their relationship, but it's meant to be a good change, shouldn't it? Why then does it seem like they've grown miles apart after it?
    “ Mira.  ” he felt his heart freeze, when she avoided his touch.  “ Are you okay? ” Her red eyes didn't make him feel any better at all.
He saw her open her mouth slowly, he didn't realize just how eager he was to hear her voice until she spoke. “ I'm no longer a maiden, am I? ” Though her question sounded super weird, yet he felt he had to answer and he did.  “ Yes. ” 
“ I am also very likely to become pregnant, right? ” Joseph struggled to let out his words, as the emotions present in her words were too intense. “ Yes. ” 
He tried to reach for her once again, but she avoided him. She stood up abruptly from the bed and that was when she noticed the red patch of blood on the sheets. Though he already changed the sheets to avoid scaring her, it couldn't be helped since she was still bleeding.
  
  Their eyes met after being fixed on the spot for about a minute, he thought he saw the lone tear which fell out of the corner of her eye before she wiped it out at the speed of life. “ Please stay away from me. ” He gulped hearing her words. “ I don't feel safe around you. ” Her final words were like fiery knives piercing through his heart. 
   She ran off into the bathroom and shut the door behind her before he could even react. 
“ What's this, Lord? ”  He fell on his knees  feeling completely broken after her outburst. “ This wasn't part of our agreement. ”
 “ My thoughts are nothing like your thoughts, And my ways are far beyond anything you could imagine.
 For just as the heavens are higher than the earth, so my ways are higher than your ways and my thoughts higher than your thoughts. ” The deep still voice made him pause as he figured the hidden message behind them.
“ Love is patient. ” He'd only glanced through 1 Corinthians 13 a couple of times, so he wasn't expecting a verse from him to drop at that time. But it did.
Indeed. he was going to be needing a lot of patience from here on.
Funny how his love was finally going to be tested.
Whether or not his love will win is left for us to find out. 
……
A/N : What do you think, guys?