Still Ella's POV
After that conversation with Ethan, I felt like something inside me just snapped. There were no more tears to shed, no more thoughts to dig through. It was just… emptiness. But I couldn’t stay in that feeling forever. I had to get out of it somehow, and luckily, Baguio was the perfect distraction.
I needed this. Being away from everything. Even my thoughts. Just being in the mountains with my brother and friends, breathing in the cold air, I could almost pretend everything was fine.
Khian had this whole day planned out, hiking, horseback riding, and later, some beach time even though we weren’t exactly in the beach city yet. It didn’t matter. Anything to keep moving, keep busy.
“Ella!” Sophie’s voice snapped me back to reality as she ran over, already holding a basket full of flowers. “You’re falling behind! Look at all these!” She practically shoved them in my face, laughing. I couldn’t help but smile back, even if it didn’t reach my eyes fully.
“Yeah, yeah. I’m coming.” I jogged over to catch up with them, letting myself fall into the rhythm of it, picking flowers, hearing Lily’s sarcastic comments about how Sophie was just picking whatever was color and not caring if they were ripe or not.
“This one’s tiny, Sophie. Did you even check it?” Lily laughed, holding up a tiny, half-ripe glomming flower.
“Does it matter?” Sophie huffed, crossing her arms. “A flower is a flower.”
Khian, as usual, stayed quiet but was smiling a bit as he filled his basket like he was on some serious mission. Seeing him like this, relaxed, not the overprotective older brother for once, made me feel better. He looked over at me and gave a small nod, like he knew what I was thinking.
I needed this. I needed to be here, with them. No matter how much everything hurt inside, at least I wasn’t alone.
---
Later, we ended up by some small lake, where they rented out boats. It wasn’t part of Khian’s plan, but Sophie, being Sophie, insisted on trying to row us around. I had my doubts, but the idea of getting out on the water seemed peaceful.
I found myself sitting in the back of the boat with Khian, while Sophie and Lily argued up front about who should row. Of course, it turned into a disaster, with the boat barely moving in any direction.
“This is not how it’s done, Sophie!” Lily groaned, yanking the oar from her.
“Then you do it, Miss ‘I-know-everything!’” Sophie shot back, letting go dramatically. The boat jerked a bit, and I almost fell off the side.
Khian chuckled beside me. “It’s a miracle we haven’t capsized yet.”
I rolled my eyes but smiled, watching them bicker. “If they’d stop fighting, maybe we’d actually get somewhere.”
It was nice, though. In the chaos of everything, I didn’t feel so heavy. It was as if the moment I focused on these little things, all that stuff with Ethan just faded into the background. At least for a while.
We finally got back to shore after Sophie declared she was done rowing for life. After that, Khian suggested we visit the strawberry farms one last time before heading back to the cabin for the evening.
---
Back at the cabin, it was quiet. The night air was cool, and for the first time in a long while, I felt some sense of peace. I sat outside on the small porch, staring up at the stars, just letting myself breathe.
Khian stepped out after a while and sat down next to me. “You okay?” he asked, his voice gentle.
I nodded, though I wasn’t entirely sure if it was true. “Yeah… I think so. It’s just... everything with Ethan. It’s hard to shake.”
He didn’t say anything for a bit, just stared out at the trees, his usual calm demeanor kicking in. “It’s gonna take time,” he finally said. “But you’ll get through it.”
“I don’t know, Khian. It’s like no matter how hard I try, he’s still there. In the back of my mind.” My voice wavered just a little. “But I don’t want to feel like this anymore. I want to move on, be okay without him.”
“You’re stronger than you think,” Khian said, giving me a reassuring look. “And you’ve got us. Don’t forget that.”
I leaned into him, resting my head on his shoulder. “I know. I just need time. A lot of time.”
We sat there in silence for a while, just watching the stars, until Sophie burst through the door, breaking whatever quiet moment we had.
“Guys! The movie’s starting! Get in here!” she shouted, waving her arms like a maniac.
Khian chuckled. “Guess we should head in before she loses it.” I nodded and smiled.
I stood up, feeling better. Maybe I wasn’t completely okay yet. But I’d get there. I promise that.
---
As we headed inside, the warmth from the small fireplace in the cabin hit me, and I realized how cold it had gotten outside. It was comforting in a way, like I was finally able to thaw a little from all the feelings I’d been pushing away.
Sophie had already set up the blankets on the floor, popcorn everywhere as usual. She was flipping through channels, looking for some cheesy movie that none of us would admit to loving but would secretly enjoy. Lily sat cross-legged with her phone, pretending to be above all of this, but I knew she’d cave and watch. She always did.
I plopped down on the couch, pulling a blanket over myself, trying to hide a small smile. Khian sat beside me, settling in with the rest of us, though his focus was half on his phone—probably something to do with the school board, as always. But he was here, and that’s what mattered.
“Okay, okay! I found one!” Sophie yelled, throwing the remote down triumphantly as some romantic comedy flashed on the screen. I groaned.
“Really? This one?” I asked, though I couldn’t hide the small laugh that escaped me.
“Yes, this one,” Sophie said, her eyes gleaming with fake seriousness. “We need love and laughter, Ella! Don’t fight it!”
Lily snorted, finally tossing her phone to the side. “You say that, but you’ll be crying before the end.”
“Will not!” Sophie shot back, her cheeks already pink from laughing too hard.
---
The movie played, I found myself getting lost in it. Not in the plot, but in the way it felt to be surrounded by these people. My brother, my friends. These were the moments that made everything bearable, even when life felt too big, too heavy.
There was a scene in the movie, a couple arguing, something dramatic and over the top, and I saw Sophie sneakily wiping her eyes. I nudged Khian and nodded toward her, both of us stifling a laugh.
“You okay there, Soph?” I teased.
Sophie glared at me through teary eyes. “Shut up, Ella. It’s just... look, they love each other but keep messing things up. It’s sad!”
Lily rolled her eyes. “You cry at toothpaste commercials.”
“You’re heartless, Lily!” Sophie whined dramatically, throwing a handful of popcorn at her. “Heartless!”
It was silly. Ridiculous, even. But for those moments, I forgot. I forgot about Ethan, about the hurt, about everything weighing on me. It was just us, in this tiny cabin, laughing, making fun of each other, pretending like the world outside didn’t exist.
---
Hours passed, and by the time the credits rolled, Lily and Sophie had both fallen asleep on the floor. Sophie snored lightly, tangled in blankets, while Lily lay sprawled out, still clutching her phone. Khian had slipped away at some point, leaving me alone on the couch, just staring at the TV screen, now dark and silent.
I thought about everything, again. Ethan’s words kept replaying in my head, like a broken record. No matter how hard I tried to distract myself, he was always there, in the background.
But being here, in this moment, surrounded by the people I loved... it was different. Maybe I didn’t have to have all the answers right now. Maybe it was okay to just let things be, even if they were messy and confusing.
I heard soft footsteps behind me and looked up to see Khian leaning in the doorway. He didn’t say anything, just gave me a small smile, like he knew exactly what was on my mind. He always did.
“Thanks,” I whispered, not really knowing what I was thanking him for. Just… everything, I guess.
He nodded, as if to say, “Always.”
---
The next morning, the sunlight streamed through the cabin windows, waking us up one by one. Sophie groaned dramatically as she stretched, rubbing her eyes. “Do we have to get up?”
“We’re going to the beach today,” Khian said, already packing up his bag. He was always the early bird.
The mention of the beach got everyone moving, even if Sophie still complained about how tired she was. We packed our things and headed out, the cool breeze of Baguio following us as we made our way down the mountain toward the coast.
I didn’t know what I expected from this trip, but whatever it was, it was better than being back home, drowning in all those heavy feelings. I needed to be here. To feel this. The air, the laughter, the quiet moments.
As we reached the beach, I let the sand between my toes ground me, the waves crashing softly in the background. We ran into the water, splashing each other, laughing like we were kids again. For the first time in a while, I felt like I could breathe, like I wasn’t carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders.
Sophie tackled me into the water, making a huge splash. “You’re not getting out of this one, Ella!” she shrieked, grinning wildly.
“Okay, okay! I give up!” I laughed, wiping water from my face.
For a moment, I looked out at the horizon, the sun starting to dip low in the sky. And maybe things with Ethan weren’t as clear as I wanted them to be. Maybe there would be more pain, more confusion. But right now, standing in the ocean with my brother and friends is enough for this today.