I immediately get to mom's bed and wake her up as the tension between Angelo and me grows. The only thing that keeps me from venting my anger at him is having mom in one room.
I gently rock mom's shoulder to wake her up. "Mom, he's here; wake up."
Mom must be in deep sleep as she hasn't come back to her senses the third time I shake her arm.
"Angel, you can let your mom rest for a while. I can wait." Angelo says to me while I am desperately trying to wake mom up.
I can't. I refuse to voice it out. I snort at the thought of it. It looks like mom is seriously sleeping like a baby, so I had no choice but to sit opposite Angelo's couch. I throw him a swift glance when his eyes are on mom.
Angelo is still wearing a black suit. He is obviously from work or from his office and goes directly here to meet us. The Rolex wristwatch is noticeable on his wrist. What can I expect from a business mogul like him? Even so, I don't feel like clinging into his arms, claiming him as my father.
I hate to admit it, but we have similar face profiles. I thought I was more of my mom's facial resemblance, but it's not. I got my eyes from Angelo as well.
"How are you?"
I look away when he sees me taking a second look at him. He smiles at me, I refuse to give it back to him.
"Fine." This is my short reply.
"I heard you and your friends were on holiday during the weekend. How was it?"
"It was fun," I answered, still avoiding Angelo's face. I can't stand looking at him in the eyes. I feel sick in my stomach; that's how much I hate him.
"I'm glad you had fun with your friends, that's the only thing I wanted, to see you happy. And besides, it's due time to go out with them for some time; it's part of growing up."
How did he know I had never gone out with friends? Probably mom told him. It turns out that there's nothing I can hide from him; they even have a secret together. I'm such a fool thinking mom and I are the closest. When she shared her secret with Angelo, it broke the close bonds between us.
I stay quiet to cut him off from asking more questions that I don't feel like answering. And hoping mom will wake up soon.
"Angel, how was your relationship with Maddox?"
What do I expect? Of course, he knows about Maddox and me. As the owner of the school, he can get any pieces of information he needs efficiently. Or possibly it was mom again; Angelo learned it from mom. Either way, I don't feel like talking about my personal life with Angelo.
I don't see him as a father figure to me; he is just an ordinary person. I heave a heavy sigh and look at him in the eyes.
"You seem like you can get any information you want. Why do you have to ask me?"
I feel terrible for answering him the way I did. He was kind, but the hatred in my heart resurfaces every time I see his face.
Angelo startles upon hearing my answer. He probably didn't expect I'd answer him the way I did. I was rude, and I don't feel good about it; yet, I don't like conversing with him either.
"Angelo, you're here," mom said, yawning.
Thank God she saves me from so much tension between Angelo and me.
"Mom, you're awake."
I walk close to mom's bed, and I hear footsteps behind me. It must be Angelo.
"Good evening, Athena; I'm sorry I haven't attended to your earlier. I have loads of work and meeting engagement." Angelo gathers mom's hand as he gets close to her.
"Please, Angelo, you don't have to be sorry. Everything is fine."
If I didn't know Angelo had a family, they would make a sweet couple. They look at each other with so much affection, a smile never leaving their faces. For a second, I admire them for having too much love even though fate wasn't in their favor.
It breaks my heart to think about it. If only fate was on their side, I would have had a happy family. I shut my eyes to cut off my delusional thoughts. Maddox's face flashes in my head. It shatters my heart knowing Maddox and I are in the same position.
I look at them, clearing my throat to get their attention which I succeed. Angelo and mom both shift on me as they entangle their hand.
"Angel, don't be mad that we have hidden this thing for you for quite a while. Angelo and I are only looking for what's best for you, for all of us."
"Mom, what is it? The anticipation is killing me."
Mom nods yes simultaneously. "Angelo, can you say it, please? I can't."
Angelo nods in response as he purses his lips in a thin line.
"Angel, your mom has lung cancer."
And there he goes, he said it looking into mom's eyes, not me. I have no idea if it was easy for him or not. Hearing it is definitely hard for me. Recently, I had doubts about mom hiding something from me, but not this worse.
My mouth falls open upon hearing Angelo say those words, the big C. All this time, mom has been dealing with this shitty cancer on her own while I keep venting my anger on her. I feel terrible in my core for being an evil daughter for her.
It must be hard for mom. I wish I could turn back the time, and I hope that mom had chosen me to share her secret, not Angelo by that time. I envy Angelo for being mom's choice of confidant. Even Aunt Melanie knew about her diagnosis first, and I was the last to know.
"Angel, stop crying."
I notice shedding tears as mom wipe them for me. Even if I try to stop them, the tears keep flowing, blurring my vision as I glance up to mom.
"Mommy, why do I have to be the last to know?"
"Angel, we know you won't accept Angelo's help if you know everything is from him. Sweetheart, Angel, forgive me if I have to do what I did. My expenses are getting bigger and I can't afford to provide you with even the basic needs."
"Don't blame your mom, Angel. It was me who suggested temporarily hiding this from you while your mom is getting her treatment. We were hoping that lung cancer would be gone, but it's getting worse as months go by."
Angelo chimes in. I can't be mad at him, given that he has been helping mom. For that, I can listen to what he has to say.
"I know that. I wish you two had me involved in this since I am old enough to know things you discuss. I'm not an innocent child anymore."
"I'm sorry, Angel, I thought it was the best thing to do."
It's a surprise to hear Angelo apologize, but I refuse to answer and focus on mom instead.
"I could have taken care of you from the start and avoided venting my anger on you. You have no idea how disgusted I am with myself for getting angry with you for the past few months. I hate myself for doing it to you. I'm a bad daughter."
"Enough, stop crying." Mom pulls me close to her, and then she wraps her arms around me.
"You are such a good daughter to me, Angel. I wouldn't want any other daughter except you. I will keep choosing you, sweetheart."
I can feel a hand stroking on my back, and I am sure it's not mom's hand. Angelo, trying to console me? I refuse to voice out my question. For the first time, I’m feeling a father's hand lay on my back. It's surreal, but I feel him gently easing my pain.
I keep sobbing in my mom's chest while Angelo continuously stroking my back. Am I delusional if I ask God to make it last for long?